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what all can be put in a court order?

Posted by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:12 PM
  • 7 Replies
I've been getting little pointers from you ladies, family, and friends about putting this in the CO, putting that in the CO. Are COs really that detailed? I would like to ask for things in our CO for our upcoming court date next month, but I don't want to seem unreasonable or that I'm asking for to much. I just want to feel safe sending dd 1200 miles away. What I thought about asking for in the CO is: * bf maintain a phone. * he gives 30 days notice of his choosing of weeks for summer visitation. * no spanking. * notice of where dd will be when with him, if he has to work(who will be watching her). * 30 days notice of any cancellations or schedule changes. * if he misses any of his scheduled visitations, he can't make them up. * at any chance he can't either accompany dd back to me, and I have to fly to get her he either loses his next schedule visitation or he pays for both pick up and drop off tickets. Plus he has to come get her. * same things goes for if he can't pay to return dd. * we are only to communicate via email, UNLESS dd is calling the OP. Does any of this sound unreasonable? ** my situation is my ex has been mia til this june(dd is 3), we went to court and as of right now he has supervised visitation one day a week for 3hrs. We go to court again on the 25th of next month. And we are relocating 1200 miles away from him in January. Also if this matters I have sole physical and legal custody of dd.
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by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:12 PM
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Replies (1-7):
mommyneedssleep
by Member on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:24 PM

i would word it that he wont lose his next visit if you have to fly to get her, i would just state that he is required to pay for her visit to him and back.....they wont take away visits as it interferes with the relationship that is trying to be built, now if chooses not to take her that is different

 

ame4c
by Group Admin on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:41 PM

 CO are as detailed as you want them to be.  You can put anything in it.  If you want him to return your kids only wearing blue socks and red underwear then that can be put in the order as long as he agrees to it or the judge orders it.

I don't think they will allow 30 days notice though.  2 days is what a judge gave me and shit he doesn't follow it.  You need to pick your battles, because if it's crazy stuff then most likely your X will not follow it and then you can either accept he's not going to follow it or take his ass back to court (that can get expensive).  I would have things like who's paying for travel on visitation days?  Who is keeping insurance on the kids?  I don't see anything wrong with your requests.  Just keep in mind that you may not get everything you ask for.

If he's been MIA, has he been paying child support?  If not you can ask for child support to be back dated.  Your lawyer should be able to tell you if what you want is unreasonable.  He or she will know the judge better because they have been in their courts before.

I'm not quit sure about the sole physical and legal custody, if you have that then why are you going back to court?  Is he trying to get joint?  If that's the case, I don't see the judge giving joint to a MIA father.

luvmykids08_10
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:58 PM
No we're going for a parenting time modification for now until January when we relocate, and then from January on til.


Quoting ame4c:

 CO are as detailed as you want them to be.  You can put anything in it.  If you want him to return your kids only wearing blue socks and red underwear then that can be put in the order as long as he agrees to it or the judge orders it.


I don't think they will allow 30 days notice though.  2 days is what a judge gave me and shit he doesn't follow it.  You need to pick your battles, because if it's crazy stuff then most likely your X will not follow it and then you can either accept he's not going to follow it or take his ass back to court (that can get expensive).  I would have things like who's paying for travel on visitation days?  Who is keeping insurance on the kids?  I don't see anything wrong with your requests.  Just keep in mind that you may not get everything you ask for.


If he's been MIA, has he been paying child support?  If not you can ask for child support to be back dated.  Your lawyer should be able to tell you if what you want is unreasonable.  He or she will know the judge better because they have been in their courts before.


I'm not quit sure about the sole physical and legal custody, if you have that then why are you going back to court?  Is he trying to get joint?  If that's the case, I don't see the judge giving joint to a MIA father.


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Robsessed98
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 2:20 PM
anything can be put in a co. i doubt youll get everything you want though. 30 days is probably not gonna happen. I get 48 ho├║rs notice. but be sure you ask for everything you want.. the worst that can happen is the judge says no.
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manders018
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 2:28 PM

You won't be able to take away his visitation time. You are the one who is relocating so you might even be required to pay all of the travel expenses.

You can have your court order set up with great detail. Mine has exact times, locations and dates for visitations. I also have sole legal and physical custody.

Good Luck and your best bet is to get a good lawyer.

rugrats2
by on Sep. 15, 2011 at 3:13 PM

Definitely be detailed. If he has supervised visits then and she is soo young i wouldnt agree to any visitation unless he flies to you , do you trust him with your child? No if you have sole l& P custody then you make the decisions not him. Why are his visits supervised? why doesnt he have a phone? Why do you communicate only by email.? It is better to be very tight about what you give up now, you can always give him more time as she gets older BUT its alot harder to take back what you give him now. Believe me!

luvmykids08_10
by on Sep. 15, 2011 at 3:44 PM
He's been mia for 3 yrs, the courts gave him supervised because she doesn't know he's her father. He says his phone is cut off.


Quoting rugrats2:

Definitely be detailed. If he has supervised visits then and she is soo young i wouldnt agree to any visitation unless he flies to you , do you trust him with your child? No if you have sole l& P custody then you make the decisions not him. Why are his visits supervised? why doesnt he have a phone? Why do you communicate only by email.? It is better to be very tight about what you give up now, you can always give him more time as she gets older BUT its alot harder to take back what you give him now. Believe me!


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