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Husband At Any Cost?

Posted by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 10:30 PM
  • 14 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Should you marry someone just....

Options:

so that you won't be alone

so that you're kids have a father

for the money?


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 4

View Results

Sometimes I feel like I desperately need to find a husband!!!  I am so afraid trying to raise these babies by myself!!  I am so tired and wish I had someone to lean on sometimes.  What should I do?  I want the babies to have a father and not just a series of "uncles".  But I'm also afraid of bringing a monster into their lives.  How can I EVER do this alone?

I am tired, worried, stressed out and afraid:(

by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 10:30 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Tashia07
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 10:50 PM

I would love to have a partner, but not at any cost. That just creates a terrible atmosphere, where people turn into roommates and not a couple. My son has a father attempting to be in his life, but they just don't seem to click (even at 3 yrs old). My son prefers my brother in-law.  You can do it alone and if the right person enters your life you'll know.  Don't settle because the moment you do the perfect man will show up. LOL well that is my luck anyways!

serenityspeaks
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 10:54 PM

no no and no....my kids have a father so if I find someone it would be because I love them. They need to of course be good with my kids and treat them well but I cant imagine any man treating them like their dad so when that man comes along then maybe he will be the right one...I dunno I am new to this. I am not rich and while it would be nice to be with someone that makes good money its not a reason to marry. I mangae on my own somehow someway.

LancesMom
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 11:12 PM

None of the above!

Kissybratzmom
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 11:20 PM

Exactly. I would rather be alone the rest of my life then to settle with someone. You do NOT need a man to raise your children. You CAN do it by yourself. If you go into something looking for a father figure you're just going to scare the guys away from the get go.

Quoting LancesMom:

None of the above!


krysstizzle
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 11:23 PM
I say none of the above, but I know how you feel. I don't know if its my age or the season change or what, but all I think about lately is getting married (well, not ALL, but ya know....) it gets kinda lonely sometimes, and I'd love to have a dad around for my boys (their dad isn't in their life). But you just have to do your thing, enjoy it and wallow in it. As many nights as I lay in bed exhausted, wishing I had someone around to be my friend, i'll have just as many nights where im listening to sinatra, drinking red wine and dancing around my kitchen while I cook awesome italian. Things will happen when and how they're supposed to, chin up. It'll work, somehow, someway. :)
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LifeCafe42
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 11:28 PM
Agree fully!

Quoting Kissybratzmom:

Exactly. I would rather be alone the rest of my life then to settle with someone. You do NOT need a man to raise your children. You CAN do it by yourself. If you go into something looking for a father figure you're just going to scare the guys away from the get go.

Quoting LancesMom:

None of the above!


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
LovinLiv
by on Nov. 10, 2011 at 12:35 AM



Quoting LifeCafe42:

Agree fully!



Quoting Kissybratzmom:

Exactly. I would rather be alone the rest of my life then to settle with someone. You do NOT need a man to raise your children. You CAN do it by yourself. If you go into something looking for a father figure you're just going to scare the guys away from the get go.

Quoting LancesMom:

None of the above!



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
SinceresMomma
by on Nov. 10, 2011 at 12:41 AM
Snatched the words right out of my mouth. So agree


Quoting LifeCafe42:

Agree fully!



Quoting Kissybratzmom:

Exactly. I would rather be alone the rest of my life then to settle with someone. You do NOT need a man to raise your children. You CAN do it by yourself. If you go into something looking for a father figure you're just going to scare the guys away from the get go.

Quoting LancesMom:

None of the above!



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
hargonagain
by on Nov. 10, 2011 at 2:11 AM

Your kids' safety and happiness are more important than getting married for the sake of being married.  Many pediophiles use women for easy access to their kids.  Also, I don't know what it is, but many of the cases of child abuse we get at my work (I work at a prison) are step fathers or mother's boyfriends that beat and kill these babies.  I adopted my son as a single mom and I have dated four people since he was placed.  I am much happier and more relaxed doing it by myself because I won't trust anyone with my son.  My son's life is worth way more than any of the reasons you mentioned.  Instead of leaning on a guy, find a friend who also needs some time off and swap babysitting once a week.  Don't be afraid, women are extremely strong when they need to be!  It sucks they call us the weaker sex, women are powerful and strong when they have to be.  God gave us the strength to care for, protect, nurture and raise our babies, we just have to find it.  It isn't the father bear who will maul you to protect his cubs, it is the Mama bear you have to watch out for! 


You can do this!

Momsboys2
by on Nov. 10, 2011 at 2:11 AM

 I am not at a place where I want a partner, but there are times when I don't like being single. I can't see ever being at a point where I would be willing to do anything just to not be alone. Just try to stay strong and that when you are where you need to be in your life will meet that someone special until then just try to stay strong.

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