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No dad or pt dad? Vote

Posted by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 12:10 PM
  • 33 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Do you think it is best for a child to have a dad who is in and out at their conveinence but they have someone or no dad

Options:

No dad

A part time dad


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 115

View Results

by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 12:10 PM
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Replies (1-10):
taylansmom
by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 12:13 PM
being a parent is a full-time job and your either in it or out of it thats my take

 

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elvir2babes
by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 12:15 PM
Mine was like that, he decided to do as he pleased, and not go by the court ordered visitation schedule. There were long streches of time that he didn't even come to see the kids.
He sucks and so does any man who does this!

newmom52907
by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 12:21 PM
I am just curious as to the results. I feel i would rather have no dad than someone who comes and go's as they please. I would want consistency as far as if he comes around once a week every week as long as he does not skip visits or go months with no visits. I told my son's father that he needs to be 100% sure he wants to be in his life and i will not allow him to be in and out that is not fair to anyone. So i told him until he decides that stay away. I know he can tell me and not be 100% but i will not allow him to be in and out.
mommy2003of1
by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 1:07 PM
i say no dad cause it happened to my daughter and he was here and there when ever he wanted and it took its toll on her . and kids need staple, stearty enviroments and that includes the parents to ither your there or your not its not a choice and its not at your conviounse.. and a part time dad or mother for that matter does hurt the child more then it hurts anyone.. and it causes them to grow up and some think thats whats there suppost to do too...

   
JSG924
by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 1:15 PM
Cooper's dad has never met him and has never asked about him. So I don't know what it like to have a partime dad. So I said no dad!

Jill

single mom to little Cooper

 


 




ENIGMA007
by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 1:17 PM
My ex is strictly a Holiday dad. He lives 5 minur=tes away and only wants the child on holidays and bdays
tracy0052
by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 1:23 PM
My exhusband is a part timer and before he started that it was easier on the kids. I think if he ever gets his act together he would be good for the kids. But like it is now is no good at all! The father of my youngest, i just call him the LIAR, he's not around. I made the decision for him since he couldn't make the effort. He can just make the half ass attempt to be a part time daddy to his other 4 kids.... *a little bitter LOL

kencloli
by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 1:53 PM
I agree w/ the no dad scenario.  My ex has the kids one day a week and every other weekend and it only hurts them to not have him there more, they cry when they drop him off and they ask me questions why he spends more time with his girlfriend then them.  He only takes them because he has too and because pays child support.  He won't take them anymore than necessary because he pays me to have them full-time.

Perfect example. 

Last night my 7 year old daugther comes into my room before bedtime and asks if she can call daddy.  I never restrict my children fromm their father and so I handed her my cell phone and dialed his number.  Of course, he didn't answer it and she left him a vm telling him to call her and that she wanted to tell him good night and that she loved him.  She immediately bursts into tears and asks me why daddy doesn't love her and why daddy doesn't spend time with her, he only spends time with the boys because he says his mother spends alot of time with our daughter.  I lied and told her that daddy was probably asleep because he had to work and that he would call her back and if he did it later then I would wake her up so she could talk to him.  I got her to bed, she cried herself to sleep and about 20 minutes later I sent him a text message telling him that our daughter wanted to talk to him and to call her.  He never called.  She woke up this morning and asked if he called and I told her no and she started to cry again.  It breaks my heart that they are going through this and this was not the life that I wanted for them.  I am so pissed at him for what he did that I want to call him and tell him off.  I want to keep the kids from him because I know that it would be best for them but I know that that isn't right. 
taylansmom
by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 1:58 PM

Quoting kencloli:

I agree w/ the no dad scenario.  My ex has the kids one day a week and every other weekend and it only hurts them to not have him there more, they cry when they drop him off and they ask me questions why he spends more time with his girlfriend then them.  He only takes them because he has too and because pays child support.  He won't take them anymore than necessary because he pays me to have them full-time.

Perfect example. 

Last night my 7 year old daugther comes into my room before bedtime and asks if she can call daddy.  I never restrict my children fromm their father and so I handed her my cell phone and dialed his number.  Of course, he didn't answer it and she left him a vm telling him to call her and that she wanted to tell him good night and that she loved him.  She immediately bursts into tears and asks me why daddy doesn't love her and why daddy doesn't spend time with her, he only spends time with the boys because he says his mother spends alot of time with our daughter.  I lied and told her that daddy was probably asleep because he had to work and that he would call her back and if he did it later then I would wake her up so she could talk to him.  I got her to bed, she cried herself to sleep and about 20 minutes later I sent him a text message telling him that our daughter wanted to talk to him and to call her.  He never called.  She woke up this morning and asked if he called and I told her no and she started to cry again.  It breaks my heart that they are going through this and this was not the life that I wanted for them.  I am so pissed at him for what he did that I want to call him and tell him off.  I want to keep the kids from him because I know that it would be best for them but I know that that isn't right. 

I almost burst into tears reading this how could he do that?

 

If you collect support: http://www.cafemom.com/group/28521

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johnsonata
by on Nov. 20, 2007 at 2:05 PM
 its deifinetly better for them to have no dad at alll.... "speaking from experience".... my children havent seen their dad in four years.. but when he would come around he would do it for awhile and then we they got use to him ... he would disappear!!! It confuses them for their parent to be there part time. its not fair. Then we as the mothers have to try and make up excuses or explanations over and over .... My kids are like why does daddy always have to work... (cause thats what i tell them... he lives in cali and we live in florida) now, they are like whatever....but at this present time "he" is talking about moving back here... GUESS WHAT???? you arent about to confuse my kids.... if he wants to come back and be a man and a father and take care of his responsibilites ... thats fine... but the part time thing doesnt work... and we can do bad alll by ourselves... so save the drama for someone else.....
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