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This post is a place for us to share advice, questions and personal stories on child support.  


Here are some tips from moms in this group:

  • Creating a child support schedule without involving the court
  • Visitation when not receiving child support
  • Receiving child support while on public assistance
  • Employer withholding of child support
  • Collecting past due support payments

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Please share your best advice for those facing child support issues below!

by on Dec. 22, 2011 at 2:45 PM
Replies (171-180):
Toshi92
by on Nov. 20, 2012 at 10:15 PM

Hi folks, 

I am so glad I joined this group! My situation that I need some advice on is that I am wondering should I take my son's father for child support. All I ever asked him was to pay the tuition when I paid the sitter when my son was younger. He's 14 now. before when we both made around the same amount we went half on tuition. But now due to the economy I had to take a lower paying job and now he makes more than half of what I make yearly. so I asked him to pay more of the tuition 70/30 split which was fair. he also has tuition reiumbursement from his job and is now telling me he can't afford it??  he has a new baby now and has a family whom he lives with and his new baby momma  has another son from a previous relationship whom my son's father takes good care of. He takes so much better care of that family then his son. I sat back for 3 years and watched him do this and my own child has come back (now a teenager) and told me stuff along with mutual friends.  so we've been arguing for months now because he tells me the he can't afford it anymore and won't pay. I know eventually he will pay because he usually does at the last minute when the school is threatening to kick my child out. The thing is we share time almost joint and hes under his medical only my dental and my son is under his father's cell plan. being that he paid tuition in the past and is not necssarily a deadbeat. I'm wondering should I open up a can of worms? It's so much more convulated then this. Please ask any questions you need and give any advice you can.  I would so appreciate it. 

Has anybody been in a similar situation?

Thanks!

Cafe AmyS
by Head Admin on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:18 AM

Yes!  It's not for you, but for your son and he should be responsible for supporting him just as you are.

Quoting Toshi92:

Hi folks, 

I am so glad I joined this group! My situation that I need some advice on is that I am wondering should I take my son's father for child support. All I ever asked him was to pay the tuition when I paid the sitter when my son was younger. He's 14 now. before when we both made around the same amount we went half on tuition. But now due to the economy I had to take a lower paying job and now he makes more than half of what I make yearly. so I asked him to pay more of the tuition 70/30 split which was fair. he also has tuition reiumbursement from his job and is now telling me he can't afford it??  he has a new baby now and has a family whom he lives with and his new baby momma  has another son from a previous relationship whom my son's father takes good care of. He takes so much better care of that family then his son. I sat back for 3 years and watched him do this and my own child has come back (now a teenager) and told me stuff along with mutual friends.  so we've been arguing for months now because he tells me the he can't afford it anymore and won't pay. I know eventually he will pay because he usually does at the last minute when the school is threatening to kick my child out. The thing is we share time almost joint and hes under his medical only my dental and my son is under his father's cell plan. being that he paid tuition in the past and is not necssarily a deadbeat. I'm wondering should I open up a can of worms? It's so much more convulated then this. Please ask any questions you need and give any advice you can.  I would so appreciate it. 

Has anybody been in a similar situation?

Thanks!


ktillman91
by on Nov. 24, 2012 at 4:27 PM

I am supposed to get child support from my sons father and he hasnt paid a dime of it. Its been 5 months now. and when I called my case worker she told me that if he doesnt pay then i dont get it. what can I do to get it really enforced? He doesnt have a job so its not like they can take it from his checks?

Cafe AmyS
by Head Admin on Nov. 24, 2012 at 5:30 PM

They may not be able to take it from his checks, but it can be garnished from his tax return.  Talk to your caseworker again and if that fails, talk to an attorney.

Quoting ktillman91:

I am supposed to get child support from my sons father and he hasnt paid a dime of it. Its been 5 months now. and when I called my case worker she told me that if he doesnt pay then i dont get it. what can I do to get it really enforced? He doesnt have a job so its not like they can take it from his checks?


Searramommy
by on Nov. 27, 2012 at 7:07 AM

Hey I'm a single mom of two I just recently broke up with my sons father he is on disability ssi and ssa I don;t know if I can get child support on our son?

amc_nlmc2007
by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 12:04 PM

I have an amazing daughter but her father wants nothing to do with her even though I just started recieving child support but in the papers it doesn't say anything about him having visitation rights. Anyways he wants to sign his rights over to me so that he doesn't have to see her and what not. I am stuck in the middle of letting him sign them over or just keep things as they are? What do I do!?

Cafe AmyS
by Head Admin on Dec. 5, 2012 at 3:56 PM

Welcome to the group.  Do you think it would be better for your daughter if he signed away rights?  Does she want to know her dad?

Quoting amc_nlmc2007:

I have an amazing daughter but her father wants nothing to do with her even though I just started recieving child support but in the papers it doesn't say anything about him having visitation rights. Anyways he wants to sign his rights over to me so that he doesn't have to see her and what not. I am stuck in the middle of letting him sign them over or just keep things as they are? What do I do!?


Cafe AmyS
by Head Admin on Dec. 5, 2012 at 3:56 PM

I'm sorry for your recent break up.

You should file for child support.  I'm pretty sure you'd still qualify for at least something.

Quoting Searramommy:

Hey I'm a single mom of two I just recently broke up with my sons father he is on disability ssi and ssa I don;t know if I can get child support on our son?


tfmom3
by on Dec. 6, 2012 at 9:43 AM

My ex wants to go to court to decrease child support payments. I haven't recieved anything since Aug.2012. I think because he was out of work (again). Now that he has a job he's scared to pay. Also has about 4,500 in arrears due. He doesn't have a lawyer. Not sure what I need to do. I obviously don't want the amount changed, I still need it. I don't have money to hire a lawyer either. Can I represent myself? How?

Missjenn0829
by on Dec. 6, 2012 at 10:09 AM
I'm hoping someone can help me on my situation. I live in Arkansas and have been separated from my children's father for close to 4 years now. He is out of state and I don't have his address. I am not receiving any support from him and when he offers it, it's with a condition that he speaks to the kids. I stopped all communication between him and the children shortly after he left because while we were together he emotionally and physically abused the kids. Then even being 500 miles apart every time he would get on the phone with them they would be back in the emotional state as if he were there for days afterwards. There is no amount of money that would ever convince me to put my children in that spot again. So the situation is I need support I do not have the money it is going to take to hire a lawyer (required in my county for divorce with children) or to start a child support case. I am not receiving any benefits from the state and I'm just at a loss. He has left me with over $12,000 in debt from hot checks he wrote on our joint account (to which I've paid down to $2500 now) and with 4 kids to support on my own and no state assistance I feel very alone and stressed! I'm trying to go to school so I can make more money to support my kids but this seems to consume my every thought. Please if anyone can offer some advice on where to turn I would much appreciate it! Thanks!!
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