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Ex came by and a question? *EDIT*

Posted by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 2:59 PM
  • 90 Replies
So about an hour ago my ex came by. He knocked on the door and I looked out the side window and saw it was him so I didn't answer the door. He knocked and knocked for about 15-20 mins and then left.

About 5 minutes later he came back and started knocking again and went back to his car to blow the horn. My mom finally went to the door and talking to him through the door told him that my son and I were not home. He asked if he could wait and she told him no. He asked if he could come again to see my son and she told him it was best that he went to court to get visitation rights. He says if seeing his son would cause problems he wouldn't come again then he left. I hope he stays away so kmfx!

Now to my question: Since he's came to my home before and my son and I voluntarily left with him, if he ever decided to barge his way into my home and gets shot would it be self defense or murder?

Also, I know that I can use the FB messages against him but he can also use mine against me. We had even talked about getting back together at one point. What do you think?

EDIT: Wow, really didnt expect all of this especially the comments from a few of the commenters BUT let me say this. Y'all newbies dont know my story or situation so dont go assuming this and that in your comments.

To those with helpful comments/suggestions thank you. I appreciate it. I'd like to clear up a few things though. As much as my ex as hurt me emotionally, mentally and physically I would never want to see him hurt and I would never intentionally hurt him. I wish him nothing but the best in life. With that being said should he ever break INTO our house ( I know there's a difference between trying and actually doing it) I would try and protect my family. Imo I dont consider that premeditated because its not like I'm going to go hunt him down and hit him in the head with a baseball bat lol. Hope this clears a few things up. :)
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by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 2:59 PM
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Replies (1-10):
amber_jean101
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 3:09 PM

Why cant he see his son? This makes no sense to me.... You have no back story just a story that starts out as a dad wanting to see his son and you not wanting him too.... It was done very childishly... 

I would want my kids dad too see them if we were not together. Tell him to call and make arrangements before showing up.

Take him to court and make a schedule or even let him see your son while your there. I am not sure if he is just a bad person or you just don't want him to see his son.... Anyway your son shouldn't be kept away for no reason.... If you thought about getting back together with him then he cant be that bad and why would there be a need too shoot someone!!! That is crazy to me.

faerie75
by Ruby Member on Jan. 15, 2012 at 3:10 PM
If he came in and physically attacked u, its your right but if I was u id call.911 first befire trying to shoot him.
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faerie75
by Ruby Member on Jan. 15, 2012 at 3:11 PM
There is a background, she's a regular poster. I agree w you in most cases. This guy however just comes sniffing around trying to get in her pants. The son is just an excuse. And he's controlling

Quoting amber_jean101:

Why cant he see his son? This makes no sense to me.... You have no back story just a story that starts out as a dad wanting to see his son and you not wanting him too.... It was done very childishly... 


I would want my kids dad too see them if we were not together. Tell him to call and make arrangements before showing up.


Take him to court and make a schedule or even let him see your son while your there. I am not sure if he is just a bad person or you just don't want him to see his son.... Anyway your son shouldn't be kept away for no reason.... If you thought about getting back together with him then he cant be that bad and why would there be a need too shoot someone!!! That is crazy to me.

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amber_jean101
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 3:13 PM

thanks that makes more sense then! She needs to go and get somthing done with him then... Seems like he is just a dirt bag then!!! I would be going to court hunny!!

Quoting faerie75:

There is a background, she's a regular poster. I agree w you in most cases. This guy however just comes sniffing around trying to get in her pants. The son is just an excuse. And he's controlling

Quoting amber_jean101:

Why cant he see his son? This makes no sense to me.... You have no back story just a story that starts out as a dad wanting to see his son and you not wanting him too.... It was done very childishly... 


I would want my kids dad too see them if we were not together. Tell him to call and make arrangements before showing up.


Take him to court and make a schedule or even let him see your son while your there. I am not sure if he is just a bad person or you just don't want him to see his son.... Anyway your son shouldn't be kept away for no reason.... If you thought about getting back together with him then he cant be that bad and why would there be a need too shoot someone!!! That is crazy to me.


SexyDiva19
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 3:48 PM
Sorry for no back story. Like faire said I'm a regular here. The (short) back story is he is abusive and controlling. Restraining orders and assault charges and a torched car resulted from dating him when I was 15. He does not and should not be around my son without a court order.

Yes hes been around my son but never without me.

Quoting amber_jean101:

Why cant he see his son? This makes no sense to me.... You have no back story just a story that starts out as a dad wanting to see his son and you not wanting him too.... It was done very childishly... 


I would want my kids dad too see them if we were not together. Tell him to call and make arrangements before showing up.


Take him to court and make a schedule or even let him see your son while your there. I am not sure if he is just a bad person or you just don't want him to see his son.... Anyway your son shouldn't be kept away for no reason.... If you thought about getting back together with him then he cant be that bad and why would there be a need too shoot someone!!! That is crazy to me.



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Chanel5nyc
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:03 PM
Its very hard to prove self defense, especially with this post on cm. Even if you don't use your real name or picture on here because if you use CM on your phone or computer the police can get a lot of information from there.

Buy a stun gun or taser or something.
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SexyDiva19
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:24 PM
How so?


Quoting Chanel5nyc:

Its very hard to prove self defense, especially with this post on cm. Even if you don't use your real name or picture on here because if you use CM on your phone or computer the police can get a lot of information from there.



Buy a stun gun or taser or something.

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Blessedmommytob
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:33 PM
Being that you posted this if you were to shoot him you would be put on murder charges and it would be pre meditated. The law states of equal or lesser force, if he breaks into your house and has a gun and you shoot him you may get away with self defense. But if he comes in and hes just being forceful all you can really.do is fight back and you could even possibly get away with knocking him out with an object simply bc he is a man and you are a female. However if he doesnt have a background and ges never done anything to harm your son i dont see th re problem with letting him see his son, its not right to use that child as a weapon i dont care how he treats you, thats why hes your ex its about how he treats that little boy and your mother should stay out of it.
Chanel5nyc
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:34 PM
Let's say: Your ex comes over, you shoot him, the cops will look at all sides of the story. Self defense is the hardest thing to prove unless you are on video during the attack.

Now if the cops take your computer, its not hard to see the things you typed and posted online.

You buying a gun, shooting him and making this post in a PUBLIC group can also prove that you planned on killing him and make it look like self defense.

Instead take self defense classes, buy a stun gun, buy pepper spray, etc.

But don't get caught up with murder or self defense. I don't want to see you on a cover story for Nancy Grace. Lol.


Quoting SexyDiva19:

How so?




Quoting Chanel5nyc:

Its very hard to prove self defense, especially with this post on cm. Even if you don't use your real name or picture on here because if you use CM on your phone or computer the police can get a lot of information from there.





Buy a stun gun or taser or something.

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Chanel5nyc
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:37 PM
1 mom liked this
The ways he treats her does matter, especially when does it around their son. From her previous posts, he is verbally abusive, controlling and he broke her phone because he thought talking or texting a guy.

Quoting Blessedmommytob:

Being that you posted this if you were to shoot him you would be put on murder charges and it would be pre meditated. The law states of equal or lesser force, if he breaks into your house and has a gun and you shoot him you may get away with self defense. But if he comes in and hes just being forceful all you can really.do is fight back and you could even possibly get away with knocking him out with an object simply bc he is a man and you are a female. However if he doesnt have a background and ges never done anything to harm your son i dont see th re problem with letting him see his son, its not right to use that child as a weapon i dont care how he treats you, thats why hes your ex its about how he treats that little boy and your mother should stay out of it.
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