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Single Moms Single Moms

How do you answer your kid?

Posted by on Feb. 19, 2012 at 4:24 PM
  • 129 Replies
3 moms liked this
Today my son asked me, Mom how did you have a baby if you didn't get married?

This broke my heart and made me so sad! I told him that people can make babies even if they aren't married. I also explained how his one auntie is my half sister and has a different mom than me. He was like oh okay. But still it made me sad. I don't want him doing the things his dad did or that I did.
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by on Feb. 19, 2012 at 4:24 PM
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Replies (1-10):
clfranc
by on Feb. 19, 2012 at 4:32 PM
I'm in the same boat! I'm pregnant now and although I was suppose to get married with the bd and we were suppose to move in together complete opposite happened n on left to do it all alone. I have 3 kids my older 2 from x husband and my Lo from x boyfriend. So they understand the half sister but my middle daughter keeps asking the same ? How am I pregnant n having a baby with bd if we aren't married. I have to keep from breaking down when she asks that.
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court.0125
by on Feb. 19, 2012 at 4:38 PM
4 moms liked this
I think you answered it well! I'm pregnant with my first and am dreading the day this will come up. It's hard! But, your son is little- right? So I feel for now a simple explanation is okay. As you said he replied 'oh okay' he sure seemed to be okay with the simple explanation! As he gets older, if it comes up more, your answer can be different/more detailed.
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StephMarie_Mom
by on Feb. 19, 2012 at 6:30 PM
Bump!
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StephMarie_Mom
by on Feb. 19, 2012 at 6:31 PM
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This is a good question. I sometimes fear the day when my daughter may ask me the same thing, because her father is totally out of the picture since I was pregnant. He harassed me a couple times, but it's been quiet *fingerscrossed* since then. He's a pretty unstable person with a drinking problem, and I hope to keep him as far away as possible.
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Shy_Dia
by Silver Member on Feb. 19, 2012 at 6:41 PM
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at least your son doesnt want to marry you...?

DS went through this stage where he wanted a baby brother... so he figured that HE'D be the dad, and I'D be the mom, and we had to get married to get it done... i was like "where would B be in all this?" (B if my BF- not DS's bio-dad).... and he said something about being a grandpa.

he'll be okay though. even if he goes through the same things you or his dad did- its lessons that he might have to learn himself... hopefully he learns through you- but some people are hardheaded and stubborn! lol

MissTuree
by Bronze Member on Feb. 19, 2012 at 7:36 PM
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When my son started asking about it I told him that there were a lot of parents that didn't get married. Some mommy's just take care of their babies by themselves, some daddy's take care of babies by themselves and some don't have any parents, just grandparents. All families are different, but that didn't mean that any were less special...just different.

 

MeeshMom
by Platinum Member on Feb. 19, 2012 at 9:02 PM
My son wants to marry me too. Lots of kids go thru a phase at this young age that they wanna marry their mom or dad. It's normal.

Quoting Shy_Dia:

at least your son doesnt want to marry you...?

DS went through this stage where he wanted a baby brother... so he figured that HE'D be the dad, and I'D be the mom, and we had to get married to get it done... i was like "where would B be in all this?" (B if my BF- not DS's bio-dad).... and he said something about being a grandpa.

he'll be okay though. even if he goes through the same things you or his dad did- its lessons that he might have to learn himself... hopefully he learns through you- but some people are hardheaded and stubborn! lol

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mysty923
by on Feb. 19, 2012 at 9:18 PM

OUCH

I can't imagine.  Good luck

iluvmybabe
by on Feb. 19, 2012 at 9:37 PM
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Yeah, I dread the hard questions. Luckily she has only brought up the (former) engagement a few times and is like oh, ok.

This morning DD asked me "why didn't God give me any brothers or sisters?" I told her that before I even think about having another baby I have to find someone who loves us very much and wants to be part of our family.
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Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Feb. 19, 2012 at 10:03 PM
1 mom liked this

I get the "how come you and daddy aren't married anymore?"

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