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Tell me your story

Posted by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 1:25 PM
  • 35 Replies

 Lets get to know eachother! Tell me your story :)

I was 17 when i got pregnant by my bf of 9months. We  got engaged..it took me 3days to call that off because hes just really immature. He abused me emotionally and physically throughout my pregnancy(physically wasnt very often so i thought itd get better). We found out we were having a girl, he was really disappointed and said we should try again after i have her...he worked at tacobell at the time and didnt make nearly enough to fully support one baby let alone 2. I was a nanny for 2 little girls. A 3month old and 2yr old. I had to quit my job when i was about 26 weeks pregnant bc i started having contractions and they said she had IUGR. My dad has alot of heart problems and had major heart surgery at the Cleveland clinic, he wasnt supposed to survive but he did. Hes 45 never smoked, hardly ever drank, very physically fit and has always had heart problems for whatever reason. That was very stressful and no surprise my bf wasnt supportive or helpful emotionally at all. He got a reckless driving ticket with me in the car while i was pregnant he really just doesnt care about anyone but himself and it makes me sad for our daughter but oh well. So my dd was breech so we scheduled a csection at 39 weeks. her dad was in the room. He stayed overnight with me and was super helpful at night but slept all day..but he was still more helpful than i expected so i was thinking maybe this will actually work. When i got home i had to beg him to come see me and the baby. Whenever i saw him he would try to get me to have sex(i was 2weeks pp when this started happening) and he tried to convince me to try for another baby as if he even cares about this one :( Eventually i grew very distant because of resentment and him basicly being a douche so the day before valentines day he comes over then says he has to go do something he'll be right back(15 minutes he says) 3hrs later hes still not there i tell him this isnt working out and he says i was thinking the same thing. later i find out hed been cheating on me and is now dating that girl. He comes to see dd maybe once a week for an hour but says he wants 50/50 custody and hes going to take me to court. I left alot out but im having a bad day so i thought maybe thinking about all the horrible things hes done and is doing would make me feel better about being without him and it really helped :) so share your story if you want

by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 1:25 PM
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Replies (1-10):
xpectingmama10
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 1:44 PM

My DD's dad proposed after 6 days of meeting...i was stupid and thought omg yay wedding so i said yes. He had an awesome job it was great 2 weeks later he quit cuz his daddy yelled at him at work. i didnt see anything wrong at the time so i supported him with my 1600$ a month and paid all his shit and ended up in debt and hiding my car from getting repo'd and dealt with his alcohol abuse which he would beat the shit out of me or try to kill me depending on how he felt that night. one night i remember he came after me and his friend knocked him out with one punch. well he asked for a baby and STUPID ME i got pregnant then he pulled the me or baby card on me i chose baby he stuck around for another 2 months abused me more then took me to my mom and dads and i never saw him again my dd is 2 now and has never seen him. fine with me hes no good. i suffer from anxiety and depression because when i got induced at 35 weeks my daughter was really sick and i didnt get to see her till the next day so it still upsets me to think about it. but now shes healthy happy and wild hhahaha. 

photogal831
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 1:51 PM

Sounds like getting out of that relationship was the best choice you could have made. I'm so glad to hear that you're dad made it through that surgery, my dad has heart issues too...only his isn't operable.

My story isn't very dramatic...kinda but not too bad lol bd and i started dating spring of 2009, he broke things off with me in the fall of 2009....broke up with me over the phone while he was at some girls house...he said nothing happened before we broke up but they slept together two days after we broke up, smh....the reason he said he didn't want to be with me was because I asked too much from him...he broke things off the night before my friends funeral....I was pretty devastated. Well come to find out this girl he got with has a fiance she never told bd about, so she breaks up with bd and goes with her fiance out of state. Me and bd started "hooking up" again....nothing serious lol then what do you know 4 months later I find out I'm pregnant! A month after, we decided to give it another go....it went pretty well until I was 8 months pregnant and his ex comes back around, saying that her son (who was like 3 or 4 months old at the time) could be bd's....I was crushed! To this day we still don't know for sure....any way.....after a very dramatic couple weeks, she gets back together with her fiance and we haven't heard anything since. Ds is born and everything was fine at first, but our sex life became more and more strained, he was never there for me emotionally at all, every time I would cry he would instantly get upset and tell me to knock it off! He was also kind of verbally abusive...just always put me down every time we got into an argument, called me names, tell me I wasn't good enough, ect. Also, during our entire relationship he never worked, he went to school but only ever took elective classes, I worked to support all three of us....finally I just couldn't take it any more and ended it.....we're both still very civil, even though sometimes he makes that incredibly difficult lol we get along as long as we're not around each other for extended periods of time lol

LTryon
by Member on Apr. 25, 2012 at 1:55 PM
Bump for later
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sophiesister2
by Member on Apr. 25, 2012 at 2:00 PM
How old is your baby? Is he very involved? And im sorry to hear about your dad :/ my dad will eventually need a heart transplant and it sucks bc he gets tired easily so he cnt do much but hes my dds favorite person after me of course ;p lol


Quoting photogal831:

Sounds like getting out of that relationship was the best choice you could have made. I'm so glad to hear that you're dad made it through that surgery, my dad has heart issues too...only his isn't operable.

My story isn't very dramatic...kinda but not too bad lol bd and i started dating spring of 2009, he broke things off with me in the fall of 2009....broke up with me over the phone while he was at some girls house...he said nothing happened before we broke up but they slept together two days after we broke up, smh....the reason he said he didn't want to be with me was because I asked too much from him...he broke things off the night before my friends funeral....I was pretty devastated. Well come to find out this girl he got with has a fiance she never told bd about, so she breaks up with bd and goes with her fiance out of state. Me and bd started "hooking up" again....nothing serious lol then what do you know 4 months later I find out I'm pregnant! A month after, we decided to give it another go....it went pretty well until I was 8 months pregnant and his ex comes back around, saying that her son (who was like 3 or 4 months old at the time) could be bd's....I was crushed! To this day we still don't know for sure....any way.....after a very dramatic couple weeks, she gets back together with her fiance and we haven't heard anything since. Ds is born and everything was fine at first, but our sex life became more and more strained, he was never there for me emotionally at all, every time I would cry he would instantly get upset and tell me to knock it off! He was also kind of verbally abusive...just always put me down every time we got into an argument, called me names, tell me I wasn't good enough, ect. Also, during our entire relationship he never worked, he went to school but only ever took elective classes, I worked to support all three of us....finally I just couldn't take it any more and ended it.....we're both still very civil, even though sometimes he makes that incredibly difficult lol we get along as long as we're not around each other for extended periods of time lol


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stickyfingers
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 2:05 PM
bump for later! when im not on my phone and can actually type! lol
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photogal831
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 2:08 PM

He's 16 months now...broke things off when he was like 9-10 months....yea he's involved, he sees him usually 2 times a week....yea he's been dealing with it for like 7 years now....but when he was first diagnosed they only gave him 2...so far so good...my dad is ds's favorite too....he comes over more often then bd

Quoting sophiesister2:

How old is your baby? Is he very involved? And im sorry to hear about your dad :/ my dad will eventually need a heart transplant and it sucks bc he gets tired easily so he cnt do much but hes my dds favorite person after me of course ;p lol


Quoting photogal831:

Sounds like getting out of that relationship was the best choice you could have made. I'm so glad to hear that you're dad made it through that surgery, my dad has heart issues too...only his isn't operable.

My story isn't very dramatic...kinda but not too bad lol bd and i started dating spring of 2009, he broke things off with me in the fall of 2009....broke up with me over the phone while he was at some girls house...he said nothing happened before we broke up but they slept together two days after we broke up, smh....the reason he said he didn't want to be with me was because I asked too much from him...he broke things off the night before my friends funeral....I was pretty devastated. Well come to find out this girl he got with has a fiance she never told bd about, so she breaks up with bd and goes with her fiance out of state. Me and bd started "hooking up" again....nothing serious lol then what do you know 4 months later I find out I'm pregnant! A month after, we decided to give it another go....it went pretty well until I was 8 months pregnant and his ex comes back around, saying that her son (who was like 3 or 4 months old at the time) could be bd's....I was crushed! To this day we still don't know for sure....any way.....after a very dramatic couple weeks, she gets back together with her fiance and we haven't heard anything since. Ds is born and everything was fine at first, but our sex life became more and more strained, he was never there for me emotionally at all, every time I would cry he would instantly get upset and tell me to knock it off! He was also kind of verbally abusive...just always put me down every time we got into an argument, called me names, tell me I wasn't good enough, ect. Also, during our entire relationship he never worked, he went to school but only ever took elective classes, I worked to support all three of us....finally I just couldn't take it any more and ended it.....we're both still very civil, even though sometimes he makes that incredibly difficult lol we get along as long as we're not around each other for extended periods of time lol



CountryStrong84
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 2:16 PM
I'll do this when I get on the computer.
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turtlebear
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 2:57 PM

Sorry to hear about your dad. But it sounds like getting away/out of that relationship was the best thing for you and your LO. Also sorry you are having a bad day, I hope it gets better. 

My story starts about 6 years ago :/ Got with this guy he was great, nice, ect. Was with him for over about 2 years before I got pregnant. We were living with his grandparents and they said either get married or get out cuz they didn't want to have a 'bastard child' in their house....so we got married. He didn't work. I did up until my doctor told me I couldn't cuz I was going to lose our baby. We ended up moving in with his mom, she was on a lot of prescription drugs. She would forget she took them and take them again, it got to the point she was so high that she thought MY daughter was HERS. So we moved out and in with my dad. My EXDH was/became more verbally abusive. Put me down every day, told me no one else would ever want me, when his family would start drama with us he would take their side and bash me more. He got a job and lost it so I went to school and we lived on whatever I had left of my grants. He was very lazy never really payed attention to our DD sat around playing video games, never cleaned up after himself, only payed attention to me when he wanted sex, would rape me if I said no, ect. Perfect picture of a dead beat dad....While in school I realized how much better my life was without him around, I was happy, I had friends again. I started making plans to leave him but didn't have the money for a divorce and since he was living in my dads house I knew he wouldn't leave willingly. Eventually my new found freedom lead to me cheating on him. When he found out he pulled a knife on me if front of our DD. Threw me all over the house, into walls, head butted me, took away my phone so I couldn't call for help wouldn't let me go out side to get to a neighbor....it was bad. Eventually a cop came and said he wanted to take me to jail because my EXDH had marks from where I bit him to get him off of me. I don't bruse easily and was wearing long sleeves, EXDH was smart in the sense that he new where to hit to hide what he did and never hit me in the face. Later I found out the cop was a brother to my EXDH's old gf....He moved out and never wanted to see our DD. I would ask call and see if he wanted to talk to her, no. Not until 5 months after we separated. He started saying he was going to kidnap her, take her out of this country and make sure I would never see her again. Once that finally stopped I let her go over to see him. We were doing good. He was getting to see her every other weekend as was our verbal agreement because we didn't have any papers in place (and since we thought about trying to fix our relationship why file for divorce). It's been 2 years now and we will never get back together. He met someone new and after being with her for 2 months started correcting my DD to call her 'new mommy'. Then started telling her that she was never going to see me again. Recently I went to drop her off at his house and he choked me out and kidnapped my DD for 2 weeks. I traded him the title to his car for her (he gets his mail sent to my house still) and that's all he wanted. Needless to say I have filed for divorce and he has not seen her in 3 months and he wont see her until the courts say so....

lydi
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 3:41 PM

 i am glad there is this group because we all know and understand how truly some men are hard core dead beat dads. my story seems tame compared to others but it was still traumatizing for me.

i met my ex husband when i was 21 (he was 37)  he seemed perfect.  we got married and then pregnant and he changed, kept losing his jobs, ended up with a part time coffee house job and smoked a lot of weed in the basement while i was super sick from being pregnant,  all his lies started coming out, he lies so much that he actually believes the crap he says.  we got into an arguement and he pushed me into a wall while he going upstairs. so i left him when i was about 4 months pregnant. he stole all my money out of my bank account and didnt help pack up the house or repaint or clean (we rented and needed to put it back the way it was when we moved in)   we went to court i won full legal and physical custody and he had very strict visitation rules to follow,  he rarely came around.  i found out on fb he was having another child (they both lied to me and told me she was 23 but she was 18 and according to her story she might have been 17 when she got pregnant) and he was 44 i think. and so he saw her for a few times and then left again.   then he contacted me when they broke up saying he was ready to be a father so i let him see her, he would always cancel or take her to his work to spend "time" with her. and would bring her home early bc his son was fussy or tired.   so i told him that is not ok. so he has not seen her since.  he tried contacting me again but i told him if he wants to see her i will always be there and so he has not called again.

MIMIBRIE
by Jayme on Apr. 25, 2012 at 3:47 PM
1 mom liked this
I got pregnant when I was in 17 had my oldest dd when I was 18. Got pregnant again at 18 had my second dd at 19. We broke up when dd#2 was a year or so. We don't talk he doesn't see the girls but does pay child support. Last year I had my third dd. her father is married and hasn't seen her.
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