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appropriate disclipline for five year old..and vent..I can't keep dealing with this.

Posted by on May. 3, 2012 at 9:20 AM
  • 21 Replies


My five year old has me at the end of my rope. She will not get dressed in the morning. She will do it for daycare, her dad, my mom, everyone else. She has tantrums that her clothes are too tight, too loose, itchy, or there is something not right about every fucking of them. It's to the point, I'm ready to call her dad and say, you want to be a fucking father, come pick her up. She's welcome to come home when she can get dressed. And before I get bashed, I've tried everything. I've talked to her dr., we do a chore chart, I've tried letting her pick out her clothes at the store, she picks and tries on her clothes the night before, wearing her clothes to bed the night before, I let her help with laundry, every possible thing you can think of I've tried. I can't keep having every damn morning a miserable scream fest because my 5 year old can't figure out what she wants to wear when her outfits are [picked out the night before. Magically there is a problem with them every goddamn morning. SHe screams like I"m hurting her, in reality I"m chasing her around the fucking room forcing something on her. She went to school today in some shit that wasn't weather appropriate (shorts and a tank top). I told her she was not allowed to change clothes (her teacher has let her in the past), and I told her if it was too cold for her to go outside she had to go to the younger kids room and stay in. Here's the thing, at this point I could give a fuck what she wears, I just want her to wear something, anything, that doesn't require a fight. IDC if she goes in her pajamas, but even thats a fight. I fucking hate my life. I hate that this is my life every fucking morning. It's always a fight and I"m done iwth it. I'm done iwth doing this shit on my own. I just need some fucking help and I have none, not a fucking soul will help me.

Anyways, I told her her discipline for tonight is she will come home and clean the room that she destroyed this morning. She will come down and have dinner, and go back up and sit on her bed until it's bed time. In the past I've taken TV priveleges, playing outside, everything. She doesn't care. Is this appropriate for her age? Help me please. I'm out of ideas and patience..

by on May. 3, 2012 at 9:20 AM
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by on May. 3, 2012 at 11:22 AM


by on May. 3, 2012 at 12:16 PM
I think that's fine for her age. Hopefully she'll get past this stage
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by on May. 3, 2012 at 12:28 PM
that is appropriate for her age my 5 yr old hates it..... On the clothing my dd is 5 and she does that sometimes or sometimes she dont like what i picked out for her so in the morning i tell her to go dress and i say no dress no shorts no tanks she kinda listens on that aspect.. But on discipline does she really love to do something
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by on May. 3, 2012 at 1:56 PM
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 Deep breaths, dear.  It's only just beginning.  Wait until she's a teenager and wants to wear daisy dukes and have cleavage hanging out.  I definitely feel your pain. 

Now, to try to help.  Have you tried positive reinforcement?  What does she reeeeaaalllly love doing?  How about a chart with stars and if she reaches 5 for the week (receiving a star when she gets dressed with no hassle) she gets a special treat (ice cream cone trip) or special barbie or doll, or mommy paints her toenails pretty.  Just something out of the ordinary.  Hope that helps...good luck.

by on May. 3, 2012 at 2:05 PM

 Vent away.  Your post.

by on May. 3, 2012 at 2:08 PM

 I don't know what to say, besides, she does it for others. Obviously she is just working you. Does she know this irrates you? Do you make a big scene over the matter? I am just a this what I say type parent. If I say it, it will be done, and my kids no not to fight the matter. They do, don't get me wrong, but they realize real quick I mean business. I don't let them see it drives me crazy, I just take charge. I honestly think she just knows it bothers you.

by on May. 3, 2012 at 2:36 PM
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 I personally think the positive reinforcement is the best idea.  It osunds now like she is getting attention by acting out so the more upset you get, the more attention she gets!  Try like one poster mentioned the chart with stars, or I know it's bad but I used to offer money like say .25 for every morning she gets dressed all by herself.  Phrase it to her in a way like "You are becoming such a big girl now, I am so proud.  I think you are old enough now to get dressed yourself.  If you need any help I will be here but for every day you can dress yourself you get money"  After awhile when she accumulates some take her out to her choice, ice cream, new small toy, etc.   Good luck, remember it is usually a phase and she is just very headstrong which in a way is good! :-)

by on May. 3, 2012 at 4:08 PM

Sounds appropriate to me. Punishment fits the crime. I hope she behaves better soon.

by on May. 3, 2012 at 4:21 PM

 are you suuuuuuuuuuure we didnt swap daughters somehow????? mine was doing the EXACT same thing and on top of that my 2yo son was doing it as well. I have started having her pick out clothes before bed...sometimes she sleeps in them so i dont haveto cahnge her in the mornings and has helped alot. im sure you have tried that already but...thats just whats working for me sure it will change....

Also because i KNOW im going to basically going to battle my kids in the morning I take 5min before I get them up and just kinda remind myself that it wont always be this 20 years myhouse will be quiet and ill miss them so much. That even tho they fight me on little things all the time they still love me and i love helps me feel a little calmer with them when im reading to scream!!! I do feel your frustration I really do, i have no help and get very overwhelmed too. but you can handle it...

by on May. 3, 2012 at 4:56 PM

 My son wears whatever I give him sometimes or he will go get a shirt he wants. I pick out his cloths and he then picks out what he wears of what I got him. He can wear anything he wants at any time lol sometimes it is funny. U need to laugh and just giggle at the choice of cloths she wears and make it fun for her. I know its hard but just try it and make it fun.

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