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"Isn't that what child support is for?" UPDATE

Posted by on May. 6, 2012 at 12:50 AM
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 Thats what my DD's dad said when I asked him to buy her a new pair of sneakers.  Let me give you the breakdown on his child support versus the expenses for my DD.

 

Child care - $660

His child support - $320...yes, he pays less than half the cost of her childcare.  I almost laughed in his face.  No, douche, your childsupport gives you the ability to work for a living, nothing more.  I wanted to say, be happy I"m only asking you for sneakers.  I could take you back to raise the child support (my lawyer said I could get $900 a month), but I won't do that because it's not worth it to me. Just buy her some fucking sneakers asshole.  I promise, the next time he something stupid comes out of his face like that I'm going to make sure he knows that.  Not because I'm threatening him with it, just so he is aware that I am not the life and money sucking bitch he thinks I am.  My gosh, its not like I ask him for ANYTHING.  And I wouldn't, but I feel like I've bought her everything, and him nothing, so the least he could do is spent 30 or 40 bucks on sneakers.  It's not going to break the bank...plus I told him it didn't need to be done this weekend, just sometime in the next few weeks...UGGH...how did I procreate with such a stupid human being.  Lets just hope my DD gets my brains lol.

UPDATE

He bought our DD sneakers, but apparently he is keeping them at his house.  Fair enough jackass.  I will purchase her a pair of shoes and she can wear them wherever.  I'm going to be the adult here and not engage in an argument.  I don't know why I asked the question to begin with.  Her child care won't cost as much when she starts kindergarten anyways.  It will go form $660 to $400.  UGGHH

 

by on May. 6, 2012 at 12:50 AM
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Replies (1-10):
aj23
by Amanda on May. 6, 2012 at 1:03 AM

That's one of the rare things I like about my sons dad. He knows better than to ever say anything like that when I ask him to buy something. He pays $250 a month and one time he said he would rather split things 50/50 as they come up instead of paying a set amount. I told him that would be great and listed all the things that I needed his half for. I just covered clothes, soccer and school supplies before he changed his mind. He knows that if I say I need money for something or I need him to buy something it means he needs to buy it and not give me any crap about it.

Chanel5nyc
by Shanell on May. 6, 2012 at 1:11 AM
2 moms liked this
I agree with him. Now, if you wanted him to pay for activities like karate, dancing lessons, etc. That's different.

If you have a problem with $320 a month, take him to court.
animebuddy
by Platinum Member on May. 6, 2012 at 6:06 AM
1 mom liked this
If you can get more child support, then take him to court. Then you won't have to ask him to buy a thing.
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Lunarprancer
by Bronze Member on May. 6, 2012 at 6:09 AM
1 mom liked this

 You should go to court and get the full amount of support your child deserves, imo.

BeachMommy07
by on May. 6, 2012 at 6:47 AM
2 moms liked this

$320 a month? That's it? And he can't cough up money for sneakers? Wow.......I'm on your side!

momtoboysjc
by on May. 6, 2012 at 8:21 AM
Agreed! I get $290/mo...I agreed to $550/mo when court said $989 I agreed for a fee reasons and have never regretted my decision on that. I haven't asked my ex for money because its not worth it but if I did and he said no it'd be on!! Lol

Summer daycare: $640
Lets not forget child support isnt only for daycare...its for food, rent/mortgage, utilities, transportation, clothing. Our daily expenses (housing & utilities) are part of it because they need a place to live. I am not saying it is to cover the full cost of everything but it is cost of living which is considered when the amount is set.


Quoting BeachMommy07:

$320 a month? That's it? And he can't cough up money for sneakers? Wow.......I'm on your side!


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sllytnkrbl
by on May. 6, 2012 at 8:32 AM
1 mom liked this

 I get $1000 a month from the stbxh now thanks to the state minimum requirements, when he found out he flipped and asked if we could come to an agreement ourselves and not tell anyone, I told him that if I get a decent job that takes care of expenses and gives me enough left over we'll talk but right now I need that money for the kids and to pay our major bills like utilities and mortgage.  He had to start paying this week so he asked me when I was going to cash the check and give him some back - I just looked at him and said I am depositing the check period.   He was ticked but it's not like he can do anything, if he stops paying I go to court.   Guys have no idea how much it costs to live - just housing alone between mortgage, insurance, taxes and utilities is more than what he gives me, add in groceries, necessities and childcare and he's got it easy - my expenses are easily double his per month and that includes his cs payments.

mamadee1971
by Dionne on May. 6, 2012 at 10:07 AM


Quoting sllytnkrbl:

 I get $1000 a month from the stbxh now thanks to the state minimum requirements, when he found out he flipped and asked if we could come to an agreement ourselves and not tell anyone, I told him that if I get a decent job that takes care of expenses and gives me enough left over we'll talk but right now I need that money for the kids and to pay our major bills like utilities and mortgage.  He had to start paying this week so he asked me when I was going to cash the check and give him some back - I just looked at him and said I am depositing the check period.   He was ticked but it's not like he can do anything, if he stops paying I go to court.   Guys have no idea how much it costs to live - just housing alone between mortgage, insurance, taxes and utilities is more than what he gives me, add in groceries, necessities and childcare and he's got it easy - my expenses are easily double his per month and that includes his cs payments.

That definitely sounds like some shit my kids father would say (in red).

jdrabbit01
by Member on May. 6, 2012 at 10:25 AM


Quoting wigglesmomma22:

 Thats what my DD's dad said when I asked him to buy her a new pair of sneakers.  Let me give you the breakdown on his child support versus the expenses for my DD.

 

Child care - $660

His child support - $320...yes, he pays less than half the cost of her childcare.  I almost laughed in his face.  No, douche, your childsupport gives you the ability to work for a living, nothing more.  I wanted to say, be happy I"m only asking you for sneakers.  I could take you back to raise the child support (my lawyer said I could get $900 a month), but I won't do that because it's not worth it to me. Just buy her some fucking sneakers asshole.  I promise, the next time he something stupid comes out of his face like that I'm going to make sure he knows that.  Not because I'm threatening him with it, just so he is aware that I am not the life and money sucking bitch he thinks I am.  My gosh, its not like I ask him for ANYTHING.  And I wouldn't, but I feel like I've bought her everything, and him nothing, so the least he could do is spent 30 or 40 bucks on sneakers.  It's not going to break the bank...plus I told him it didn't need to be done this weekend, just sometime in the next few weeks...UGGH...how did I procreate with such a stupid human being.  Lets just hope my DD gets my brains lol.

Honestly, who cares what he thinks.  I say this because I thought the same way.  The state sets up their calculations for a reason.  Go by what the state says.  Go to court, get the money the state says your child is entitled to and be done with it.  He's going to think whatever he wants to think no matter what you do.  My ex thought I was going to be all kinds of evil.  He was pissed at me for filing for divorce.  He cheated, he lied, and when I took the time to go through the courts to protect my child, he thought I was trying to screw him over.  I am not evil.  I am not vindictive.  I will go to the ends of the earth to provide for and protect my child.  If that means going to court and getting him what he deserves, that is what I will do.  Now I work hard to have a decent relationship with my son's father, but his feelings about me have no bearing on getting my son what he needs.  Take the power out of his hands.  Don't grovel to him to get things your child needs.  Seriously. let the state make the decision.  Then stand by it.  

wigglesmomma22
by on May. 6, 2012 at 10:51 AM

 I'm confused by your statement.  I'm not asking him to pay for activities...I pay for those myself and do them on my time with her.  I'm asking him to buy her a pair of sneakers because his child support only covers half her childcare.  The way I see it, I'm doing him a favor by not taking him back to court.  I asked for new sneakers because the ones she has are almost outgrown and they are starting to look raggedy. 

He automatically assumes that because his ex wife screws him left and right that I do the same.  The thing is, his ex wife and I, as well as our children are very different.  His ex wife stayed at home and didn't have half the expenses that our child does.  IMO, if he wants to work, its his job to pay half the daycare...if it comes up again, I'll let him know he can either pay the occassional item (Its the first time in 4 years I've asked him for anything) or I can take him back for an additionall $100 per month or something.  I don't want to fight with him...but I also want him to get that I'm not asking him because I want to cause problems, but I don't want to cause either of us the hassel...

Quoting Chanel5nyc:

I agree with him. Now, if you wanted him to pay for activities like karate, dancing lessons, etc. That's different.

If you have a problem with $320 a month, take him to court.

 

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