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Moving On- Need advice

Posted by on May. 6, 2012 at 11:48 PM
  • 4 Replies

 Hi my name is Amber and I have a soon to be 2 year old son. His dad and I had been together since July 2009 and broke up back in November after getting back after a short break. I understand that we are not meant to be a couple and have no desire to get back with him because we have come to realize we are better as friends. The thing is that he's my frist love and even though we are friends and still want the best for each other, I am really struggling with the fact that he is starting to talk to someone.... I want him to be happy but is it selfish of me that I cant be happy for him unless I am with someone too? I catch myself thinking back of the all the good memories we had together and sometimes I wish I just had someone else to distract me. Just looking for advice... Anyone else been in a situation like this?

by on May. 6, 2012 at 11:48 PM
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lissetteP
by Silver Member on May. 6, 2012 at 11:53 PM
1 mom liked this
Yes mama I've been there..still kinda am...but fuck it it is what it is...stop thinking about the memories that sure isn't gonna help ...distract your self go out with your girls..meet other ppl, socialize ....you'll be fine..and I wouldn't call it selfish..its a natrual feeling u can't help but soon will get over :)..
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hopealways4019
by Bronze Member on May. 7, 2012 at 9:25 PM
You haven't move on yet, yes its tough, he moving on. Once you find someone, it will be easier to accept. In the meantime, just be happy for him.
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MamasaurusPrime
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:54 PM

Moving on is a process of time.

It takes a while for some. It doesn't for others. You just need to keep yourself occupied. Don't let the past define your present or future - you just gotta keep on trucking. There's no right or wrong way on how to move on. It took me 3 years after having my son to do so.

Ngi ne themba - I have hope.

tsherman
by on May. 7, 2012 at 11:13 PM
1 mom liked this

I have been divorced for about a year now and I am just facing this same bitter reality myself.  I too feel ok with not being with my ex and definitely don't want to get back together with him.  But, to know he has moved on FIRST is a bitter pill to swallow.  I have found girlfriends and those who have been through this situation provide some awesome insight and support.  I hope you can reach out to some of your co-workers or friends to help you through the rough times.  I also found a church my son and I both love!  That has been a huge support as well.  God will bring the right man into your (and my) life in His time.  Love on yourself and your little boy in the meantime.  And, focus on a walk with God!! : )

 

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