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oh my god. please help. i need advice.

Posted by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:30 PM
  • 70 Replies
So I got some texts from BD tonight stating this:

Give me my son when he's born. You won't be a good mother and you don't want him anyway. I have a better home for him than you. You didn't even want him. You used me to get pregnant for your own selfish reasons so I would stay with you. I won't let you take advantage of me again. I will settle for nothing less than having full custody and allowing YOU visitation. I have an endless supply of money now and a great lawyer who will ensure I get full custody. I will take you down a road that will leave you bruised and hating me if you don't give me what I want. And he's going to have my last name too. So you need to write up a document stating you will give me joint physical and legal custody and my last name or I will fight you and take you down that road.

I'm speechless. And now I'm scared that he will fight me and get full custody because I do not have money like he does for a good lawyer. I don't know what to do. I'm really terrified. My house was messy the last few times he came by and he said that its an unfit home and he will send social services to have a field day with me. I have a decent home. And just because I had some piles of laundry...? I hate him. This really frightens me though. I don't know what to do and I'm just scared now because of his threats
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:30 PM
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Replies (1-10):
brieri
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:35 PM

The only word I can come up with at this time is "Man".  Sorry, don't know what to say.

MunchiesMom324
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:36 PM
4 moms liked this

Yikes... I would be saving every text, letter and vmail from him... and see if you can consult w/ a lawyer for free.  See what they advise, then go to legal aid.  Don't give in to him - if you don't want to give into his demands, then you must fight it... and I would be making sure the house was so clean you could lick the floor.  **hugs**  I hope everything works out.

Nicole.Brown
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:36 PM

i think you should fight it. SMH 

Nicole.Brown
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:37 PM

and print the text out and use it as proof . and ALL messages

Angelicmom24
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:38 PM
Well do your best to not give him any doubts.(tho he always will create them it seems) like landary keep it up keep things orderly and clean keep records of all things he says.or does like emails texts..and watch out for people he is connected with that are around you he could use others.Ans stuipd spies I'm not trying to scare u just think what he can see.. unless he can prove ur unfit or mentally ill then he doubtful will get full control but try to get the best knowledge and legal aid u can..learn all u can for ur state and laws and stay strong
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iTaelor
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:38 PM
3 moms liked this
He's obviously stupid, messy house doesn't make u a bad parent. He's got no grounds for anything other than shared custody. Tell him to buzz off. And keep the messages he sent because they are threatening.
SLOmommy
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:42 PM
8 moms liked this
Go down to your city's courthouse and talk with a family law advocate immediately.
Also, tell everyone you want what's best for the baby so you plan to breastfeed. Period.
Save those texts and let them know that you are worried about the hostility and threats. That isn't good for a baby.
Don't fight with him. Don't say negative things. Don't even answer his texts! Don't give him a thing to use against you....
and no, a messy house will never be a reason to take a baby from its mother. Unless the baby is in danger or you are doing anything illegal, you WILL be fine.
DO NOT LET HIM SCARE YOU!!
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the.real.me
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:46 PM
1 mom liked this

takes a LOT to take custody from a bio mom that isnt abusive, on drugs or absolutely unfit. dont let him intimidate you.  his words dont mean jack shit to a judge....   my mature response would have been nothing. If I was immature at all... which is often... my response would have been something along the lines of "bring it on bastard.  Ps. let me know how you do LACTATING. "     Good luck. 

shygrl3cccm
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:47 PM
1 mom liked this
That's all he is trying to do, scare you and its working!!!! We are talking about what will be a infant here. There is no court in their right mind that is going to think its in the child best interest to give full custody to the Dad, unless his Lawyers can prove he can breastfeed hahaha LOL!!! Or he can prove your a drug addict or abusive?? Are you? If no, don't worry.

Sorry he sounds like a D-O-U-C-H-E. The whole time I was reading his text I was like what! Whatever get out of my face. If all his got is a messy house- his got news.

Is he trying to get out of child support? Get a journal, write the date he wrote the text and what he wrote. Keep track of his actions, and remeber everything will be OK!

My ex took me to court for 50/50, and it all backfired on his ass.... look at in a different perspective. Like how he will have to help you.

Don't worry mama, I know its easier said than done, but I've been there and I worried myself sick so many times and in the end all it did was favor me!
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the.real.me
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:47 PM

this!

Quoting SLOmommy:

Go down to your city's courthouse and talk with a family law advocate immediately.
Also, tell everyone you want what's best for the baby so you plan to breastfeed. Period.
Save those texts and let them know that you are worried about the hostility and threats. That isn't good for a baby.
Don't fight with him. Don't say negative things. Don't even answer his texts! Don't give him a thing to use against you....
and no, a messy house will never be a reason to take a baby from its mother. Unless the baby is in danger or you are doing anything illegal, you WILL be fine.
DO NOT LET HIM SCARE YOU!!


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