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what do you say to your child?

Posted by on Jun. 30, 2012 at 2:48 PM
  • 11 Replies

I have never spoken bad about my daughters father (out loud haha) and try to be cordial with him but when he makes promises and doesnt follow through on them I dont want to make excuses for him I want her to know exactly who he is but its hard to watch the disappointment. I read so many posts about dont tell your child things about the dad let them find out he is a douche on their own cause he will show his true colors eventually well my question is what do you do when he does show his true colors and your child comes to you asking why daddy is like that or why daddy didnt do what he said

by on Jun. 30, 2012 at 2:48 PM
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Replies (1-10):
1stpreggers
by on Jun. 30, 2012 at 2:51 PM
2 moms liked this
I'd make him explain it to her.
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Jeni1124
by on Jun. 30, 2012 at 3:02 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm a big believer in not putting the other parent down, yet not lying for them.

So when my daughter would ask why Daddy hasn't called/seen her I'd tell her I didn't know...that I'm pretty sure he WANTS to see her (which is true in our situation) and she should ask him because I don't know if he's been too busy or what.

gabrielat
by on Jun. 30, 2012 at 4:12 PM

I would have him explain it to her. You don't want to lie for him and have her think her father is doing something completely harmless then once she figures out the truth, blame you, you know? Just say, "next time you see your daddy, he can tell you exactly why."


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amonkeymom
by Gold Member on Jun. 30, 2012 at 4:13 PM

I agree with this.

Quoting Jeni1124:

I'm a big believer in not putting the other parent down, yet not lying for them.

So when my daughter would ask why Daddy hasn't called/seen her I'd tell her I didn't know...that I'm pretty sure he WANTS to see her (which is true in our situation) and she should ask him because I don't know if he's been too busy or what.


faerie75
by Ruby Member on Jun. 30, 2012 at 4:17 PM
I say idk. Ask him. I also never told them he was coming or getting them anything unless he was on his way or already got it
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tyfry7496
by Janet on Jun. 30, 2012 at 11:06 PM
1 mom liked this
Don't tell her when hes coming then when he doesn't show up she won't be disappointed. And have HIM explain to her why he doesn't come around.
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LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jul. 1, 2012 at 11:15 AM
I agree

Quoting tyfry7496:

Don't tell her when hes coming then when he doesn't show up she won't be disappointed. And have HIM explain to her why he doesn't come around.
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sid1083
by Silver Member on Jul. 1, 2012 at 11:54 AM
1 mom liked this
I asked my grandma this same question since she dealt with it. Her response was: let them know he loves them but this is just his way of dealing with everyone. It's not just the kids and his lack of action doesnt mean he loves them any less, he just doesn't know how to be any different.
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StephMarie_Mom
by on Jul. 1, 2012 at 12:00 PM
This.......


Quoting tyfry7496:

Don't tell her when hes coming then when he doesn't show up she won't be disappointed. And have HIM explain to her why he doesn't come around.

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Andrewsmom70
by Silver Member on Jul. 1, 2012 at 12:40 PM
If she talks directly to him and he tells her of all his grand plans, I'd tactfully remind her that she needs to remember that he has a history of not keeping his word so she won't get too excited. I'd also maybe make alternative plans for you and her so she'll have something to do to take her mind off of what a turd he is.
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