My mom is threatening to call CPS on me -_-

[Lynnster327]

So I feel pretty good about things so far. I made new friends , well mostly like caught up with old friends but yea , it felt so good to feel as though I have a life again , I don't wanna make it seem like my daughters a burden but just to have people to talk and hang with and that understand what I go threw feels great for me.


But the one problem is my mom doesn't want me to have a life, it seems like she wants me to stay home all the time doing absolutely nothing. Im 19 and yea me and my dd live with my mom (really wish I didn't) and its like I respect her house and her rules , but when I go out and I'm out late I even call to tell her , look I'm not gonna be home just giving you the heads up , this is what she says to me "I'm gonna call CPS on you cause you can't be having your daughter sleep just anywhere in the street, she needs to be in her own crib at home. Next time you do this I'm gonna make sure they take her from you and give her to her father."

Now there are many things wrong with that if you ask me , first off my bd is a deadbeat he cares only of himself and I have no contact with him. The next time we will see each other is in court !! Second he's an unfit parent and he's never home so my daughter wouldn't even be places with him , he sleeps on a couch at his dads house -_- third what exactly will you say once you call CPS that I take my daughter out with me and that sometimes I sleep over a friends house. Like I'm not harming my child, neglecting her or abusing in any type of way.

My daughter is with me at all times , ALL TIMES and for her to say something like that just makes me so angry . Like what exactly do you want me to do at home I'm not in school yet till August, I don't work cause I'm still waiting for the daycare to accept my daughter , and then to top it all off my mom goes out more then I do. She goes to Atlantic city to the casinos , to new York just to go shopping , to different parties every weekend while I'm stuck at home without an invite because "it's a party for someone I don't know" yea right.

And then I can't argue with her cause once again I'm under her roof. Not paying rent or anything , which I appreaciate cause I have my own room as well , so I try not to argue with her cause if I do she threatens to kick me out and she has before. So I try to keep my mouth shut , but it's like I wanna stand up for myself say something and tell her " look I'm a young adult now and I take care of my daughter 24/7 a day without anyone's help , you cannot keep treating me like a child I am a mother and I also want to have a life , I dont abandon my child she is with me at all times and if she's with me then you shouldn't be concerned when we're out and threaten to call CPS"

To me this whole situation is just ridiculous but what can I do ive tried to look for jobs no luck, I've tried to look for free housing no luck, so it's like I'm stuck and I don't go out but two times a week if I'm even that lucky. I just don't know what to do anymore any advice ???

[rae021]

Hmmm ... I agree but disagree. I believe a child needs to be in their bed not at friends houses. It's sacrafices. You chose to sacrafice when you had her. You come off a little selfish, yea ur 19 but Yup ur a mom ur fun and life don't come first and when you sleep out that's prob what ur mom thinks. Now by no means do I think child services is NEC. And I hear ya on the mom nagging, I've been there ugh talk about irritating.... But in then end mom being a bitch with the threats, the ultimate idea is the baby's stability and they do become custom to their enviroment so if ur out often its not good. Good luck hun

[Lynnster327]

No I understand but I've only done that twice and one was at my sisters house like I know there are sacrifices to be made once u have a child and I've made them but even when i go out and come back early it's a problem for her

[Andrewsmom70]

If you want to be treated like a responsible adult you have to act like one. Dragging your child from place to place and spending the night isn't a stable environment.

If your mom wants to go out that's her option because she doesn't have a small child to take care of. You cannot compare your life and hers at this point. The two aren't even close to the same.

If you don't want your mom criticizing your life, move out on your own and then she won't know what you're up to all the time.

You're a 19 year old mom. Your life has to change and your top priority should be your child's best interest. Yes it stinks to you to some degree but it's your reality as a single mom.

[rae021]

Sometimes moms forget that grandchildren are not their children, but one day I'm sure well be saying " I never did that with you." Shes been there but she learned on her own and she needs to let u too

[cynalex]

Yeah I think that your mom letting you stay with her is great, I wish I had that help. I understand that you want to have fun ebwryone does but once you have a child things change. Your friends ( with no kids) would do different things, maybe things where you most likely wont be bringing ir daughter around. I think that you should just keep trying harder to find a job and you could help your mom so she sees thay your able to be responsible for your actions. If you dont like staying then find a job and move out but is not easy trust me. Finding a job would help you if u want to go out u could pay a babysitter. Just dont sleep over friends house your baby needs you more :)

[cynalex]

And u cant really go out all the time

[BonneVie]

Sounds like maybe CPS could nelp you get in parenting classes or something.

[MicahBoo07]

 u are young. When I had my first son at age 21 my dad put a curfew on me saying I had to have my boy home and in his crib by 9pm every night. I didn't like it but I was under his roof so I had to deal with him and the rules. Now I am 26 with two kids, have a job, a car, an apartment and can do whatever I want but u know what I don't because my kids come first and its a hard lesson to learn but ur kids should come first at any age. Ur child needs to be in his/her own bed at a certain time so they have a regular time to go to sleep and feel safe every night and not going house to house when ever. A child can feel the difference of home and being some where else. Why can't u have ur friends come over and stay at ur place if u want to stay out have them over and make dinner or hang out. She won't call on u she is just trying to make u open ur eyes to whats going on and whats best for ur child. Parents sometimes go over board but mean the best lol.

[MorganShaye]

Sorry I cant help you. I dont know what its like to go out. I havent been out without my daughter since she was concieved. I dont get to go out with friends except for shopping together. I dont shop without my daughter, I dont go to clubs or drink AT ALL. I dont have anyone to watch my daughter so she doesnt have more than one bed to sleep in. She sleeps in her bed, in her room, every single night. Dont get me wrong, I am not complaining. I wouldnt have it any other way.

[Lynnster327]

Ok look I have only slept over someone else's house twice one was at a friends house the other time at my sisters house I don't go out drinking partying or doing any of that I go out with friends that actually are either expecting or have children and when we do go out its to the zoo to baby showers to the museum or to the park so if it that's wrong for me to take my child to those places cause what it seems like half of you are saying is I can't have a life and no I can't find a job anymore espeacially in the summer time without a car with my daughter I've gone to just about everywhere I can get to and applied for jobs so before you start critizig how about more support