Anyways flash forward to yesterday. My middle child who is 4 tells me daddy has a girlfriend and is married to( I don't think she quiet understands the whole thing). And how they ate together at a Resturant. So I asked him about it and it is true. He has friends that are women from work. He said yes and that he was going to tell me that day (as he is in his truck ready to leave). Really?! I cut the convo short with him because I am all sorts of mixed emotions. I let him know I wasn't happy.
1. We talked about not dating anyone until the divorce is final. We are still married and it would confuse the kids. WTF?! He said he wasn't ready and would let me know when he was ready to date again and I would do the same.
2. Yes I do still love him. I was with the man for almost 11 years. We have 3 kids (our son is a mini of him). I can't just shut those emotions off at the drop of a hat. It is going to take me time to move on. It bothers me he moved on so quickly.
3. Our kids come first. They should not meet every person we date unless it was serious and we told the other person about wanting to introduce our kids. I am with our kids 95% of the time. I am so pissed that he had our kids meet his girlfriend. As of now I don't know how long this relationship has been. I wouldn't think it was serious. Any guy that I date isn't going to meet my kids until things are serious. It is not fair to the kids. It would also bother me if they called someone else mom.
I should mention too that yesterday would have been our 11 years of being together. That hurt me. Dates mean something to me. I feel like I have been dumped on. I have had a lot to deal with this past year. I am getting drained from all the crap that keeps coming my way. I need a break. All I could do was cry yesterday and this am. I even dreamt about it. I know I need to talk to a professional but I just want to know if anyone has had this too. I needed to vent. Plus I am not ready to date yet and I know I want to be happy and find someone. I was just wondering too how Long after did you start dating? I feel like a big fat old cow that nobody is going to want.