Would you date a man with previous domestic violence charges?
Googled his name and found 2 mug shots (good ole Florida, lol) from 2004 & 2005. One arrest was for domestic violence, the other for domestic violence injunction. He has not told me any of this. I thought something was up with him, because he seems to "perfect". Is it worth the risk? I assume he doesn't want me to know, since he did not tell me.
Quoting CAW05:So no one can change ? Turn their life around. ? I thinks unfair to judge everyone this way. everyone is different and until you know all the details you cant really judge. People make mistakes, some make HUGE mistakes. Sometimes they learn from them. I guess it comes down to being a personal choice.
Quoting Cpdsptchgrl:
Like I said before. Abusers WILL lie and tell you the same thing someone who was wrongfully accused will tell you. You won't know if he's lying until its too late. In THIS instance it's better to play it cautious.
Quoting CAW05:
So if you did something in your past , maybe you dont want people to know about it since people judge before they know you. I wouldnt tell anyone either. Until I knew i could trust the person. Maybe the guy is a creep , maybe isn't. But how do you know till you get to know them. ? It is like saying no one deserves a second chance and screw up your life its ruined forever. I dont personally feel that way. If you wan to know something about someone just ask. If he lies then you know he is no good, if he comes clean has remorse maybe he has a chance.
Then heck no!
Just having charges doesn't necessarily mean anything if they were unfounded, but I don't care how much time he served, I don't think that's a "lesson" I would believe he'd learned.
Quoting mrsary:
He got found guilty & did time served & got it off his record some kind of way...
Quoting DDDaysh:
What happened with the charges?
Abusing is a choice not a mistake. They are addicted to power and control and know exactly what they are doing. If you've never been in an abusive relationship then you have no idea what you're talking about. In the OP's case, this new boyfriend has two domestic violence charges, those aren't mistakes.
Quoting CAW05:
So no one can change ? Turn their life around. ? I thinks unfair to judge everyone this way. everyone is different and until you know all the details you cant really judge. People make mistakes, some make HUGE mistakes. Sometimes they learn from them. I guess it comes down to being a personal choice.
Quoting Cpdsptchgrl:
Like I said before. Abusers WILL lie and tell you the same thing someone who was wrongfully accused will tell you. You won't know if he's lying until its too late. In THIS instance it's better to play it cautious.
Quoting CAW05:
So if you did something in your past , maybe you dont want people to know about it since people judge before they know you. I wouldnt tell anyone either. Until I knew i could trust the person. Maybe the guy is a creep , maybe isn't. But how do you know till you get to know them. ? It is like saying no one deserves a second chance and screw up your life its ruined forever. I dont personally feel that way. If you wan to know something about someone just ask. If he lies then you know he is no good, if he comes clean has remorse maybe he has a chance.
It would depend on the situation. Just because he was charged with domestic violence doesn't mean he beat the woman or anything like that. My dh was charged with it once because the woman wouldnt get out of the doorway so he put his hands on her arms and moved her out of the way... no violence, just a vindictive bitch. Check it out thoroughly, then make your decision based on your gut.
My daughter doesn't like my boyfriend.
- mrsary
on Jul. 15, 2012 at 11:39 AM