See what CafeMoms are saying about saving time this holiday season..
I have to start out by letting you all know, I am still married. I just figured you ladies could help me, I suppose.
I met my husband in 2009, and right about the same time we met, he had a job offer to own the business he worked for when we met, except in a different city. Same state, but just a different city. He had later asked me if I would be willing to move with him, because he didn't want to leave without me. I had of course, said yes. Not even 3 months of living in the town we do now, I had gotten pregnant. . . Loved being pregnant, and then in 2011 we had our son. . . So, I haven't worked since I was in high school, I had met my husband that soon after graduating. After not working from 18-21 I was miserable and started a complete job hunt, with no success, my husband offered to hire me at his place of employment. I wasn't too thrilled with the thought, so I asked him if I could work opposite of him. So now, we work opposite of each other not really seeing one another.
I've been so horribly lonely in my relationship I can't stand myself. I would never cheat, no matter any circumstance, so that is out of any thought. So he could do anything, i could never be unfaithful. I do however have a good friend I have talked to since I was 17. We don't live in the same state anymore, since I moved with my husband. The more I talk to my guy friend, the more I realize what I deserve. And how low I threw myself by marrying my husband. I've realized since gaining my independence, that should somebody legidimately (sp) insult or harass me, my husband won't do anything, no. . not fight, but at most stand up for me if need be. I am certain that if anybody was horrible to me he just would care. All he cares about is his electronics, his job and his booze. I've learned that when my feels are hurt over his action and I communicate that with him, I am automatically deemed crazy and am told that all the feelings I am feeling are in my head and not really happening, and that if he comes to me with his hurt feelings over actions of my own, that dammit, by god I better apologize and kiss his butt because that's just how it should be.
I've learned that just because I am working now, doesn't mean that my husband should get up with our son every now and again (he is 15 months old) I don't work nearly as much as my husband, so anything that has to do with our son is my job, because of course I did in fact get myself pregnant, he had nothing to do with it (complete sarcasm. . . our son is ours. . .) I have realized more and more, that I don't regret my son. . . I'd be lost without him. . . but I do regret who I chose to marry and have kids with. I'm glad I work opposite of my husband, I am glad Id on't have to see him anymore. Hearing him talk drives me mad . . The way he eats, the way he passes gas no matter where we are, the way he says things, I hate his self centered, egotisticle, hollier than thou attitude. He's so secretive with his phone, and his computer, he makes purchases without telling me, and then somehow I find out because it slips andI find out months later that he makes the purchases that are $100+
So with all that being said, and with talking to my guy friend, like I said I am realizing what I deserve. . .And even if it takes foreverf to find I want to find it.
So with working at my husbands business, for about 3 months now, completely opposite shifts, and feeling like I want out. . . I do want a divorce, I am tired of arguing and and having my poor son witness us as nothing but angry. My questions are, should I stick it out a little and save up some security money, and then lay out the fact that I want a divorce? Should I just go now and quit my job? I know if we divorce, I don't want to stay inthis town anymore, because I'd have nowhere to stay. I'd go stay with my mom. . .
I'm just not happy anymore.. . . Maybe this makes sense to somebody. . . sorry this is so jumbled.