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Ex Husbands WIfe overstepping her bounds?

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This is my first post I just want to get some other perspective on my ex's new wife. 

Let me give a bit of background info here. This woman is the one who my ex cheated on me with and they were married with in 4 months of the divorce being final. This is not the first marriage she has caused havoc in. My ex left me when I was 5 months pregnant with our second child. everything was fine until she got a look at our agreement all hell broke lose, attorney hired, threats and demands made all over the place and my life was made into a living hell for the last two years. Once they got married I tried to be civil and come to a place where my ex and I could be civil in front of the kids. I went as far to forgive them both for the cheating and trying to do whats best for the kids and move on with my life. For about 8 months things were good between the 3 of us, civil conversations and exchanges and even favors for each other. Now the ex has deployed and she wants visitation with my kids, just to make up some project for his birthday. They both think it will be better if she sees them and takes them for a day so when he returns the kids will only have to get used to one person not two on his visitation. On top of that because I do not agree with these visits she wants all the clothes she gave to the kids back.This woman has caused nothing but pain, anguish and un-nessisary drama in my life. She has overstepped her bounds from day one. I just always feel its two against one over here and im so over her crap. 

What are your thoughts, I'm not crazy for saying Hell NO!!!! Right......  

by on Aug. 20, 2012 at 5:43 PM
Replies (41-50):
by on Aug. 20, 2012 at 11:04 PM

 Then perhaps your ex would love to be with my ex's wife! 

Quoting mazomama:

As a mother of four,with two different fathers, I am in hope that their fathers will have a woman someday will have a relationship with my kids.
In all honesty the more adults who care for my babies the better!
I wish the best for my ex's and hope they make choices on their future wife's while taking the children into full consideration.

by on Aug. 21, 2012 at 12:32 AM

WOW I didnt expect so many diverse responses!!! Thanks for the advice everyone! I feel I have moved past the hurt and tried to really do whats best for the kids. I thought the kids seeing her might be best, however the last time we got together she stirred up so much crap and it seriously stresses me out. I dont have time to get pulled into her whatever is wrong that day and listen to her. I think in time I can get over things fully and all the way but for now I just dont want a damn thing to do with her. Maybe I will call and say she can see them for a few hours. I just dont want her to misconstrue my kindness as her getting her way. And I certainly dont want to get sucked into her crazy drama. 

by on Aug. 21, 2012 at 12:55 AM
I've been on both sides of this, except I was the stepmom raising the dd of my ex & I had her 99% of the 10 years we were together. I am also dealing with my ex-husband being with the woman he choose over me & his family right now the thing is do you trust this woman do you know her well enough to know she will take good care of your children. You already said you know she loves & cares for them & does a better job than your ex. Now onto her wanting the kids stuff back that's just downright childish & immature. They are your children and you make the rules for them until they no longer live in your home if your ex & his wife dont like your decision oh well they will have to just get over it. You just have to do what is in the best interest of you children in the end no matter how anyone else feels about it.
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by on Aug. 21, 2012 at 2:54 AM
O HELL NO! She needs to back off!
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by on Aug. 21, 2012 at 3:09 AM
I can see both sides. The asking back of the clothes. Now that's drama she's making but of she cares about them and wants to spend time with them because she misses them then maybe a trip shopping with her or movies. Now that wouldn't be so bad. Like you said they are your children not hers so you definately don't have to. And she definatelty does NOT have the right to demand to see them. Skype is a very reasonable compromise so the kids can at least speak to their dad
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by on Aug. 21, 2012 at 9:11 AM
1 mom liked this
She needs some mental help. Please get a restraining order and get her 302'ed to a mental facility. She will not stop. I'm a nurse, I use to work in a behavioral unit. We dealt with nuts like her all the time. They are not her children, and if she had destroyed marriages before she is a predator. Be very scared of her. GET HELP NOW!!!!! She is sick and the situation only gets worse.
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by on Aug. 21, 2012 at 9:24 AM
2 moms liked this
All this b.s. doing your best to get along with a mentally ill person sickens me. I see y the world is such a mess. That's just more trauma. And any woman taking part in an affair with s married man with children has some mental issues. My children are protected from such disgust. If u all grew a pair and put ur foot down none of this would be an issue.
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by on Aug. 21, 2012 at 9:31 AM

do they have any kids together??? I think about this all the time. My DH has three kids with ex and we have a DD. If he was gone off to work are etc. I would want the kids to be able to see each other. Its not that I want to over step anything but think kids should be with each other. Now if there is no kids then yeah thats just weird.

by on Aug. 21, 2012 at 9:33 AM
I dont see harm in letting them visit her. But her reaction to you saying no is way out of line.
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by on Aug. 21, 2012 at 9:49 AM
2 moms liked this
And it doesn't matter if they have kids together. It doesn't change the fact that she isn't their mother and is obviously nuts. Ur failing to see the problem. Nuts like this woman are liars. The more time u give her with ur children the more lies she can creat, the more trouble she can cause legally. And crazies like that tend to confuse children and trick them into thinking or believing apon lies against you. Do u wanna legally loose ur children to an obvious nut case??? Your husband is gone. And yes I blame her. Predators who have done the same thing to other women are good at their skill. They convince the man that their wife is less than, unsatisfied, and the bad person whom he must leave. Open ur eyes please. I worked with women just like her in the mental facilities. She won't stay with ur ex forever, their are always more men to control, more marriages to destroy, more children to mess with. Stand up and protect urself for love of God
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