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DON'T YOU LADIES GET TIRED OF FEELING SAD?

Posted by on Sep. 13, 2012 at 10:49 PM
  • 25 Replies
10 moms liked this

I was thinking about how I don't come into this group that often anymore. A lot of the post bring back feelings of sadness, anger, resentment, and bitterness. I've reached a point in my life where I've learned to forgive and move forward. So I try to stay away from certain post.


I'm not saying this to put anyone down. As single mothers or maybe even grandmothers raising grand kids, we have all felt these emotions. Each situation being different from the next, we all ended up in the same place...alone but with our children. 


There's nothing wrong with venting. I've been there. But I don't want to stay stuck in a rut. Aren't you tired of feeling miserable and holding grudges? When you sit and dwell on all the things that haven't gone right in your life, you become depressed. When you hit that point, it's hard to bounce back. I've hit bottom. It took me years to climb my way back to the top.


I don't want any of you to feel like I did. So I want to encourage you ladies to wake up with something positive on your mind. When the child support check hasn't arrived, when you haven't heard from him in days, months, or years, when you come home tired from working those long hours and you still have to cook, clean, and read bedtime stories...continue to smile. Don't beg for anything. Stop waiting around for him to do the right thing. Don't let him see you sweat. Your reason for living is that little one tucked into that bed. Do for yourself and don't wait around for handouts. You're stronger than you know you are.


It's impossible to drive forward, when you're looking out your rear view mirror. The road to success is in front of you. Never turn around ~ That's my very own quote! I should put that on a t-shirt!! Lol 

Good night ladies. Love you guys

we rockgroup huggiving mom giftjugglingbouncing momblowing kisses

by on Sep. 13, 2012 at 10:49 PM
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Replies (1-10):
chicagomom710
by on Sep. 13, 2012 at 10:55 PM
3 moms liked this

Wow, THANK YOU so much for taking the time to write that wonderful letter.  You have inspired me! Everything you said was so moving.  I trying my best every second of the day to get to where you are.  I know it takes time, but you assured me that it can happen.  You gave me a little more strength that I needed. That quote is amazing!!!!

moosesmom
by Silver Member on Sep. 13, 2012 at 10:58 PM

Good for you!! It took me years to find a happy place. If I can offer any words of encouragement to help just one person from feeling the way I felt than I've done my job. You can do it mama!

Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. 

Quoting chicagomom710:

Wow, THANK YOU so much for taking the time to write that wonderful letter.  You have inspired me! Everything you said was so moving.  I trying my best every second of the day to get to where you are.  I know it takes time, but you assured me that it can happen.  You gave me a little more strength that I needed. That quote is amazing!!!!


SinceresMomma
by on Sep. 13, 2012 at 11:01 PM
1 mom liked this
My favorite post so far in here... I'm at a point in my life where I'm trying to leave all the negativity and drama in the past.. All that matters is my little one.. He's is my true motivator
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rnchelle93
by on Sep. 13, 2012 at 11:36 PM
2 moms liked this
I do do for myself. I'm all I've got and all I'll have once baby is born. Right now, I live by fake it till you make it. I'm bitter, scared, resentful, angry, betrayed, frustrated, and numb. I put on a smile and I plan and pretend and do what happy to be pregnant women do, what women do when life hasn't fallen apart. And I hope that one day soon it won't be faking, it'll be real. Great post though!
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Mocking.Jay
by ★Krista★ on Sep. 13, 2012 at 11:43 PM
3 moms liked this

I guess people vent here because it's cheaper than therapy lol. 

But nobody is a psychologist or psychiatrist so I guess that's kinda a bummer.

But I like venting, then having someone tell me I am childish for feeling the way I do sometimes. I can get all the douchebaggery out lmfao.

Honestly, I think it's healthy to leave stuff online. Especially when you have the option to delete it and leave it in the past. I know the majority in here believe it's NOT healthy to curse your baby dad or ex out but where else can you do it? Isn't this group supposed to be a place where you can do that shit then have other mothers relate to you?

You can play the "leaving drama" card, but it just sucks when you want to be angry for that one minute or 10 minutes or however long it takes you to create a post then be bashed for letting your feelings out. That shit just gets bottled up cause let's face it, including me, there are select few members that can't STAND it when someone dictates how you should feel or suggest you leave those feelings alone. How the hell else are we to vent about an ex not paying child support, or something stupid he said about our kids/us, or whatever? You go say this in Newcomer's or Mom Confessions or something and you'd get eaten alive.

This should be a more supportive place, but it just doesn't feel that way. I have begun to symapthize with these young/newly single moms because I HAVE BEEN THERE, and so have most of you. And yes, we all feel differently but come on, if you were this member who made an angry, hostile post, wouldn't you feel awful if a bunch of know it all moms told you the guy's not wortth your anger? We KNOW that, but we just want to let it out. 

Mocking.Jay
by ★Krista★ on Sep. 13, 2012 at 11:44 PM
1 mom liked this

Might I add, it's also better than doing all of that in front of your kids.

MeeshMom
by Platinum Member on Sep. 13, 2012 at 11:45 PM
I think those of us who have been in this group all feel the way you do. We've been through this and grown. When we get a surge of newly single mothers they are all dealing with fresh wounds. They aren't where we are. But it's good for them to vent but us to share how we got through it to make it easier for others.
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moosesmom
by Silver Member on Sep. 13, 2012 at 11:50 PM

Never said there was anything wrong with venting mama :-) 

I just don't want any of you guys to CONTINUE to hold on to ill feelings. Stress kills. Of course you have to let it out. To much pressure on a hose will make it burst. Release and let go. You know?

Quoting Mocking.Jay:

I guess people vent here because it's cheaper than therapy lol. 

But nobody is a psychologist or psychiatrist so I guess that's kinda a bummer.

But I like venting, then having someone tell me I am childish for feeling the way I do sometimes. I can get all the douchebaggery out lmfao.

Honestly, I think it's healthy to leave stuff online. Especially when you have the option to delete it and leave it in the past. I know the majority in here believe it's NOT healthy to curse your baby dad or ex out but where else can you do it? Isn't this group supposed to be a place where you can do that shit then have other mothers relate to you?

You can play the "leaving drama" card, but it just sucks when you want to be angry for that one minute or 10 minutes or however long it takes you to create a post then be bashed for letting your feelings out. That shit just gets bottled up cause let's face it, including me, there are select few members that can't STAND it when someone dictates how you should feel or suggest you leave those feelings alone. How the hell else are we to vent about an ex not paying child support, or something stupid he said about our kids/us, or whatever? You go say this in Newcomer's or Mom Confessions or something and you'd get eaten alive.

This should be a more supportive place, but it just doesn't feel that way. I have begun to symapthize with these young/newly single moms because I HAVE BEEN THERE, and so have most of you. And yes, we all feel differently but come on, if you were this member who made an angry, hostile post, wouldn't you feel awful if a bunch of know it all moms told you the guy's not wortth your anger? We KNOW that, but we just want to let it out. 


moosesmom
by Silver Member on Sep. 13, 2012 at 11:51 PM

That's who I mainly wrote this for. I was thinking about the new member who say "I'm new at this. What should I do?" It's okay to be angry and hurt. Yell and scream if you need to. But don't stay in that place :-)

Quoting MeeshMom:

I think those of us who have been in this group all feel the way you do. We've been through this and grown. When we get a surge of newly single mothers they are all dealing with fresh wounds. They aren't where we are. But it's good for them to vent but us to share how we got through it to make it easier for others.


Mocking.Jay
by ★Krista★ on Sep. 13, 2012 at 11:56 PM
1 mom liked this

Ok. I probably thought way too much of your reply. I agree. It's not good to hold onto it. That's why I blog mine. I have to be super anal retentive about it too 'cause he found the last one, even though he couldn't really do anything about it 'cause everything I said was out of frustration and those things I was cursing about were also documented with my lawyer.

But yes. Vent, and leave it at that. :)

Quoting moosesmom:

Never said there was anything wrong with venting mama :-) 

I just don't want any of you guys to CONTINUE to hold on to ill feelings. Stress kills. Of course you have to let it out. To much pressure on a hose will make it burst. Release and let go. You know?

Quoting Mocking.Jay:

I guess people vent here because it's cheaper than therapy lol. 

But nobody is a psychologist or psychiatrist so I guess that's kinda a bummer.

But I like venting, then having someone tell me I am childish for feeling the way I do sometimes. I can get all the douchebaggery out lmfao.

Honestly, I think it's healthy to leave stuff online. Especially when you have the option to delete it and leave it in the past. I know the majority in here believe it's NOT healthy to curse your baby dad or ex out but where else can you do it? Isn't this group supposed to be a place where you can do that shit then have other mothers relate to you?

You can play the "leaving drama" card, but it just sucks when you want to be angry for that one minute or 10 minutes or however long it takes you to create a post then be bashed for letting your feelings out. That shit just gets bottled up cause let's face it, including me, there are select few members that can't STAND it when someone dictates how you should feel or suggest you leave those feelings alone. How the hell else are we to vent about an ex not paying child support, or something stupid he said about our kids/us, or whatever? You go say this in Newcomer's or Mom Confessions or something and you'd get eaten alive.

This should be a more supportive place, but it just doesn't feel that way. I have begun to symapthize with these young/newly single moms because I HAVE BEEN THERE, and so have most of you. And yes, we all feel differently but come on, if you were this member who made an angry, hostile post, wouldn't you feel awful if a bunch of know it all moms told you the guy's not wortth your anger? We KNOW that, but we just want to let it out. 



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