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step parents boundaries

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My sons fathers wife has been in his life since he was about 7mths old. And now that he is 3 he knows who everyone is. She has taught him to call her mommy and i find that extremely disrespectful. I could understand if the mother was not in the picture however i am, and much more than her (80/20 custody). I have told her before not to have him call her that and she no she would never, but yet he does and she doesnt correct him. How do i address this situation or do i wait til he gets older since he will then know i am his mother and she is his step parent IF she is still in the picture.
by on Sep. 24, 2012 at 9:51 PM
Replies (11-13):
by on Sep. 25, 2012 at 9:27 AM
1 mom liked this

I wouldn't allow my DH's kids to call me mom unless their own mother died.  I have respect for moms and I wouldn't want to cross that boundry.  It seems to me that this step-mom is definately crossing boundries here.  I would talk to your ex about this.  Your child seems to think that he has two mommies just because his father has remarried.  My mom and dad divorced when I was 7 and my dad remarried when I was 9.  I have never called her mom nor did she ask me or my other siblings to call her mom.  She was Jackie and our dad's wife. 

by on Sep. 25, 2012 at 11:18 AM
My stepdaughter (whose father and I are now divorced) started calling me mom when we got married. She was 7. We were together for 2 years before we were married. When we told her we were getting married she said " so can I call you mom now". She still at 16 calls me mom. When we were all together she called her mother mom. I think it was a comfortability thing for her when we were in social situations. I took care if her as if she were my own and she felt I was her mom. Her mother did try for a while to make her feel guilty for calling me that, but after a while realized it was more important for her to feel comfortable
by on Sep. 25, 2012 at 11:40 AM
I can understand why youre upset but i think turning it into anything will just upset your son. Even if she is spiteful there is no reason for you to stoop to her level. Mom is just a word that your son may not even understand yet. Start teaching him about families and blended families without making it just about "dont call her mom".
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