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Having a hard time dealing with being a single parent

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so I just gave birth to my son almost 2 weeks ago and me and his father are not together anymore and we haven't been together for a while it's been off and on for over 3 1/2 years but all he wants to do is party and be with other girls he told me he wasn't ready to be in a relationship but it seems as though after our son was born he's been searching for a gf and it looks like he has found someone he is interested in but I feel like why couldn't you commit to me but some random girl can come and change all that in two seconds it's really hard trying to raise our son who looks just like him and also at the same time trying to get over his father and he also comes over to visit with him so I see him a lot my heart feels like it's broken into a million different pieces and all I wanted was my little family to be together I feel like I have failed
by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 1:13 AM
Replies (21-24):
by on Oct. 1, 2012 at 8:43 PM
1 mom liked this

First of all, you are NOT a failure. It takes two, it really does. If the other person is not willing to put in, there really is nothing more you can do. Please try and believe that. Your first priority is that little one you've got, keeping him healthy, happy and safe. You can't do that if your constantly at odds with the other parent. As far as your heart, i would suggest napping with your son as much as you can, taking hot showers with smell good bubbles and trying to do things that you love. Cry when you feel like crying, punch things when you feel angry, but always try and find your happy place when you are with your baby boy.

I wonder why you have chosen to have your son's father visit at your place. The only way I was able to get untangled from what i was going through was to move back home. My kids father and I met while i was away in college. We moved in together had two kids, the whole family thing you are wanting. I had to have that distance in order to see clearly. I'm not saying that's right for everyone, but maybe if he could come and get the baby for a while instead of being around you/your place so much, he could still have the time with his son, but you could keep your sanity.

Feel free to message me, it sounds like a familiar story

by on Oct. 2, 2012 at 3:01 PM
1 mom liked this

HE is the failure, not you!! You are a beautiful mommy now!  Focus on your baby, this time goes by too quick!  Congratulations!!

(btw, I know what you mean because I used to think "why would he marry someone else when he had a family with me?"  But, all we can do is control our own lives and be the good influence for our children.  In my case, it really was important to get him out/divorce due to the drug abuse and alcoholism.  but that's just my story...)

by on Oct. 2, 2012 at 3:29 PM

by on Oct. 2, 2012 at 4:44 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm sorry, it's hard when you have feelings and they are not shared :( 

He's not worth your time though. Just like he met someone, you will meet someone too. I met a great man just a few months back. I never thought I would find a man that I actually thought I would want to have a life and a future with but I did and so will you. Just focus on yourself and your DS right now. We are all here for you too. 

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