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Single Moms Single Moms

Should it be a concern or not?

Posted by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 10:08 AM
  • 23 Replies

I have a concern I been hearing yes he should from friends but I don't know. I have been with my ex fiance knowing am a single mother and knows how difficult it can be has helped me when he could. He would give me gas money or whatever I need it even thou I rejected he would have stuffed it in my pocket. My kids dad did the same but we had kids and lived together for about 4 years thats a little different. So I'm used to having a guy help me in both ways financial and all. Now I'm with someone who is different from what I'm used to he makes me happy and treats me good but as far financial part not so good. We live 2.5 hours away and I'm trying to move closer and want to do a cna class but I'm short he knows and never offered to help pay for it and its not much either. So now I know financially he will never help seems like if it came down and we end up living together one day it will be separate on bills and things like that. Its different but I don't know if I should worry about it or not. My friendss say hes my bf and should offer to help. To me I think hes not obligated to do so am not his wife. So should I let it go or be a concern? Thank You ladies.

by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 10:08 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Oct. 3, 2012 at 10:16 AM
1 mom liked this

I never expect anyone to offer to help me.  I turn down all offers and make it work on my own. 

Blessed_Mommy87
by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 10:25 AM

Thank You its how I do it to, as long he makes me happy and treats me good and if that the only problem we have why should I let it get to me.

Quoting Mommyto2LilMen:

I never expect anyone to offer to help me.  I turn down all offers and make it work on my own. 


Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Oct. 3, 2012 at 10:37 AM
2 moms liked this

Don't let it get to you then.  Just keep doing what your doing and if things are meant to be it will work out.  Long distance relatioships are hard, I know first hand as my BF lives 2.5 hours away.  He left Sunday night and we probably won't be able to see him for a  month. 

Quoting Blessed_Mommy87:

Thank You its how I do it to, as long he makes me happy and treats me good and if that the only problem we have why should I let it get to me.

Quoting Mommyto2LilMen:

I never expect anyone to offer to help me.  I turn down all offers and make it work on my own. 



____________________________



easinpc
by Gold Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:05 AM

I am the same way also.

Quoting Mommyto2LilMen:

I never expect anyone to offer to help me.  I turn down all offers and make it work on my own. 


KRIZZ25
by Platinum Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 2:04 PM
i wont let a guy help me.. u never know wen it will come back on u .. like "oh i help u pay that bill" so u have to
"sleep wth me" ..
Blessed_Mommy87
by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 2:24 PM
1 mom liked this

Thank You Ladies  I will keep doing am doing. I make it fine on my own not easy but I do it.

steviechick
by Gold Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 2:28 PM
1 mom liked this

There you go, BlessedMommy. ;)

PaperClip811
by Silver Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 2:39 PM
1 mom liked this

I dont think its a red flag.. obviously before you choose to move in finances are something you should talk about, not assume one way or the other... but you are right--- it's not his responsibility to help you financially.

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Oct. 3, 2012 at 3:03 PM
I don't expect help from anyone and usually won't take any help. If you were to move in with each other then discussion of how the bills would be handled would be important.
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strongerwtime
by Silver Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 3:22 PM

I agree with most of you ladies in that going into to it I dnt expect there to be a financial  contribution  .  I do however feel that if a man is willing and wants you with him. To live closer to him, this should be folowed up with some kind of gesture to show he is at least WILLING and ABLE to provide. If he isnt showing you this...this is a sign that he either isnt ABLE or isnt WILLING....


I would accept the help of a guy that really understands or seeks to understand how sometimes it does get hard for a single mom.  Even if on a small scale it shows more than not considering the need at all.  I dont think I couldmake myself too available and exhaust my resources without knowing where things stand on a financial level between me and him...putting it all out there...if you aint got it liek that to move and he aint got it liek that to HELP you transition....what would living together actually be like? Something to think about.

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