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Single mom: Not planned!

Posted by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 10:02 PM
  • 10 Replies

Hello everyone.  I am in a tough situation and just wanted to get some input.  I am 29years old and I have no kids. I waited this long because I did not want to be a single mother.  Now I am two months pregnant and the father and I are going to go our seperate ways.  How do you channel the overwhelming emotions of sadness and anger so that the babies health won't be compromised by stress? Thanks all you wonderful single moms!!

by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 10:02 PM
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by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 10:03 PM
I think it helps to just talk and vent to others. Journaling helps too.
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by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 10:16 PM

Thanks for the input.. I do keep a journal, im actually a writer so its interesting that you mentioned that.

by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 10:18 PM
I'm a single divorced mom and I didn't plan to be a single mom either. But I find it a blessing in disguise. I don't have a so or the kids dad involved(court ordered). So I can shower my kids with more love. Yes, financially its a struggle cause I work a fulltime job and ex refuses to pay childsupport. But God provides. Your going to be fine. If your babys father doesn't want to be involved then so be it. Its easier said then done. But in the long run you maybe better off,less drama. But I would make him pay childsupport. Good luck!
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by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:19 PM
Welcome! I'm glad you found us. Focus on your child and put it first. Do everything legally and do what's best for them don't do things based on emotions you have
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by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 12:05 AM
Why are you separating? Give it time he may come around
by Member on Oct. 4, 2012 at 1:01 AM
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Think of it this way, it might not have been your plan(i dont think any of us plan to be a single parent) but it was God's plan.  It is too soon to really know if he will be around(the father) but if he is thats great and if he isnt then u were probably better off without him.  It is hard, i will not lie about that, but it makes you stronger it makes you see things in a different light.  Having a baby is exciting and emotional at the same time, do you have any family support? Hang in there, i am here if you need to talk anytime K?baby gift

by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 1:50 PM

 I don't think anyone ever plans to be a single mom, but if and when it happens, you take what you're given and make the most of it for the sake of your child and for yourself. ((HUGS))

by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 2:14 PM
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Hi!  I just joined this site too.  I am in my early 30's and this is my first pregnancy, I am three months along.  I never thought I would be a single mother.  Actually I was unsure if I wanted children at all.  After hearing the heart beat for the first time the father split and I haven't heard from him since.  I have been dealing with the overwhelming emotions as well, I am hurt and angry and it has been a struggle.  Instead of focusing on the father I try and focus on the baby I am carrying, not an easy thing to do I know.  I've joined online chat groups like this, I'm looking into single mom groups at my church, and I've been doing some light hearted reading about being a single mom.  On the days that my emotions do get the best of me I try and remember that this child will have a great life with or without the father and if it is without him it will be his loss.  I'm not waiting around for him to "come around" I am busy planning my new life with my new "family."

by Member on Oct. 4, 2012 at 2:18 PM
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I used to have anxiety attacks all the time when me and the babys father would fight. So i know where you are coming from, as soon as i knew i was pregnant i knew things had to be different and i couldnt let my body get to that stress level. Keeping my baby safe and protected is EVERYTHING to me. In my case, I turned to my religion and really emersed myself within it. I found the strength to seperate myself from the babys father and put myself in a more peaceful setting. I surrounded myself with my family and went after good things, set positive goals, joined support groups and bible study. I was actively seeking out a positive supportive and peaceful environment, and it is a HUGE help. I am happy, healthy and at peace with my situation. My religion helps me 100%
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by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 2:50 PM

I don't know many woman that plan on being single parents, I think the best way is to simply try to get your affairs in order, try to do as much as you can to make yourself feel comfortable and that you can take on this new challenge by yourself. 

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