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no contact since court....

Posted by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 9:15 AM
  • 12 Replies
I'm irritated bc my dd father has not seen her in a year, but shows up to court dates and counseling ....??? What's the point buddy? Worse is his gf wants to be her step mom and assured me that she knows I'm her mother and would like to be apart of my dd life... Well gf and I crossed paths at a local amusement park she had my dd sister ( who adored my dd and saw us) and she didn't let the girls say hi or anything. She just stared! I'm annoyed bc how are you gonna say I don't let you see her when you don't call! You don't email, text, anything! It's literally a year no calls, no visits because in all honesty they don't like me and she won't allow him to talk to me unless she can monitor it. Just a vent I don't expect much , I just know eventually the court will award him joint custody and ill be pissed off! Just bc he shows up but doesn't follow orders after we leave!
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by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 9:15 AM
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Replies (1-10):
tyfry7496
by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 9:17 AM
Document everything. You can't force someone to be a parent, court order or not.
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LifeCafe42
by Nora on Oct. 6, 2012 at 9:20 AM
Document you don't know what he is saying to her too
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Gina_C
by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 9:23 AM
I know exactly how you feel! My BD has only met my son once. After the last court date he texted a few times and then once it came time for his first child support payment, nothing. He lives out of state and I told him anytime he was in Texas he could see him. He was in Texas 2 weeks ago, only 45 minutes away and never even called. So, I just do what the courts mandate I do and notify him of anything major, like my son had surgery a couple weeks ago so I texted him to tell him when it was and after to let him know he was ok. I don't know why I even bother with that. But like pp said document everything. We will be going back to court soon because he is so far behind in payments. But I don't understand either how they can always manage to make it to court but never a visitation. F****** losers
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amonkeymom
by Gold Member on Oct. 6, 2012 at 4:06 PM

I agree.  Document every visit that he doesn't show up, every time you run into the stepmom or him in public, etc.  Keep a good record and show it next time you go to court.

Quoting tyfry7496:

Document everything. You can't force someone to be a parent, court order or not.


cw619
by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 9:50 PM

Im going through somewhat of the same situation with my BD. My son is 14 months and he has only seen him 5 times in his life and has not seen or contacted/asked me about him since this past may, yet is trying to take me to court for joint custody. I have ran into my BD mother and grandmother out in public with my son and they have pretended not to see us. I am not sure what state you live in, but here if you could prove his has not had contact with the child for 30 days he could be charged with abandonment, also if he has not seen your daughter for a long period of time visits will have to be supervised until she is comfortable with him. I agree tho to document everything you can. Keep a journal of any sort of communication, FB can be used in court as a reflection of their character (at least in the state I live in), and save all text messages you can (theres an app you can download SMS to text that will email those texts to you to save.) Good Luck!


Also I'm new to the site and I"ve seen a few posts using DD.. whats that stand for?

1scrdmom
by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 9:57 PM
Usually it means darling daughter that i know of

Quoting cw619:

Im going through somewhat of the same situation with my BD. My son is 14 months and he has only seen him 5 times in his life and has not seen or contacted/asked me about him since this past may, yet is trying to take me to court for joint custody. I have ran into my BD mother and grandmother out in public with my son and they have pretended not to see us. I am not sure what state you live in, but here if you could prove his has not had contact with the child for 30 days he could be charged with abandonment, also if he has not seen your daughter for a long period of time visits will have to be supervised until she is comfortable with him. I agree tho to document everything you can. Keep a journal of any sort of communication, FB can be used in court as a reflection of their character (at least in the state I live in), and save all text messages you can (theres an app you can download SMS to text that will email those texts to you to save.) Good Luck!


Also I'm new to the site and I"ve seen a few posts using DD.. whats that stand for?

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rae021
by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 10:20 PM
Yea, I just don't have anything to document in the past year. Prior I have everything copied, filed, dated lol but again not even a text concerning her well being. Just curious will the gf be permitted during supervised visits?
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Gina_C
by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 10:23 PM
I wouldn't think so. For us, it's supervised visits with just him and I and our son. He wasn't even allowed to bring his new wife to court


Quoting rae021:

Yea, I just don't have anything to document in the past year. Prior I have everything copied, filed, dated lol but again not even a text concerning her well being. Just curious will the gf be permitted during supervised visits?

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cw619
by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 10:44 PM

In my state (IL) we have vistiation centers where only the father would be allowed to visit, and he is observed by a social worker, but judges do not like utilize them because they cost money. They would like visits to be supervised by someone the parents can agree on, so I would try to think of something that may be willing to do that for you and that you would trust. If visits were supervised you can have it written in the court order that his wife is not allowed

rae021
by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 10:59 PM
We have absolutely no mutual party to agree on. His family isn't involved at all end mine is so protective they'd be biased. We have a court ordered counselor that is recommending supervised visits...but we are waiting to go back bc he's on house arrest( 2nd dui) and has pending assault charges in December.


Quoting cw619:

In my state (IL) we have vistiation centers where only the father would be allowed to visit, and he is observed by a social worker, but judges do not like utilize them because they cost money. They would like visits to be supervised by someone the parents can agree on, so I would try to think of something that may be willing to do that for you and that you would trust. If visits were supervised you can have it written in the court order that his wife is not allowed


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