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Freaking Out! Indiana sucks! ugh

Posted by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 1:35 PM
  • 7 Replies

Roy's dad went to court & asked for half custody but now we have to do mediation to do days/nights/holidays roy is with who. he only did it because the person he is with. She has 6 kids but she wants Roy too. Idk what to do..i keep fighting for my baby and they just believe all his lies and its not right : ( what can i do?

I am a good mom! I pay for everything, take them out like to the park(s) and go to the zoo in the summer time, feed them, give him baths, cloth him, and love/care for him.

His dad when he has him makes him play outside all day or takes him to a daycare to be watched so he doesn't have to watch him. His dad has an SUV & a BMW but yet he is $700 behind in child support. He wants my son more but he doesn't have a connection with him or shows that he loves him.

I am always early to pick up my son and he is always late to get him. If u love ur child wouldn't u be early or at least on time?

He does these out of spit for me but it is only hurting my son not me. I'm just so torn over this and don't want my son with him anymore than the times/days that the judge ordered.

The judge believed all his lies and I can't have that anymore I want my son safe and feel wanted.

The judge said he was going after half custody but the lady said there is no half custody in Indiana so if I lose I lose him and I don't want that and I know my son wouldn't want that either (he is 3 almost 4).

I'm so scared right now and I just want my son safe and well always.

by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 1:35 PM
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by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 1:39 PM

What kind of lies is he telling?

Just remember mediation isnt the judge... if you dont agree with what the Dad and the mediator are saying then you dont have to agree.

by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 8:48 AM

 He lied about me keeping Roy from him from Feb-June and thats a huge lie, he never called me or tried getting ahold of me in that time period.

I think our time/days schedual is fine and I don't see why we need to change it. Its every Wed from 8am-5pm and then every other weekend.

Today when dropped off Roy:

ugh when dropping off Roy to his dad he says did u buy him shoes yet. I said u didn't like em so I don't put them on him while he goes with u. He was raising his voice right in front of Roy & thats disgusting. Plus he had the nerve to say Roy comes in dirty cloths. I wash cloths & put them in them everyday the dumbass. Roy plays outside so yes his coat gets dirty but thats kids & no I will not wash his coat every day.

He just can't stand that I won't back down from him & will fight for my son. His mistriss is all for him & thats crazy since she is the other woman and not even his first and they still do things yuck. I just want Roy safe and away from his raising of voice and trying to be demanding.

He always tries telling me what to spend the child support money on like today the shoes and then its cloths. I get what clothing and shoes my son needs when he needs it. He said he doesn't want to pay and is done playing games. I said good no more games from u finally and he didn't like that.

I'm just so done with him and his fits he has. Why does he try telling me what to do? Why does he raise his voice? Why can't he just talk normal tone and then I might listen. He kept pointing his finger at me and getting in my space and I don't like that. Roy kept hugging me and wouldn't let go so he took his hand and made him go with him. I pray my son is safe and comes back to me when it is 5pm.

by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 1:48 PM

Typically in states where custody is all or nothing when the parties can't agree, unless there is abuse or other extenuating circumstances, custody won't just change hands if your son has primarily been with you. Dad could get more visitation, but I'd be shocked if there was a dramatic change from what has been the status quo.

by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 2:06 PM
Your ex has to have proof to back up his accusations or lies. If you have custody now and are a good mother, most judges wont reassign custody without solid proof that the child is neglected or abused. I think youre worrying too much over something that has a slim chance of happening. I know not worrying is easier said than done, but I have been through 2 custody battles and even though I was sure Id win both times, its still pretty damn scary. Good luck.
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by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:00 PM

Indiana does have joint custody laws, so I don't know who "the lady" is that told you differently.  Get a lawyer, go to legal aide if you can't afford one.

by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:05 PM

 Its scary because we did our sepeart interviews with the domestic violince person and they recomened to the judge that we do mediation to settle the visitation issue but the lady didn't tell me anything on if I got to keep full custody or not she just told me that right now I am..I'm not sure how she called it but its up in the air and I don't know how this could happen. I am a good mom to my kids, I work part time, feed, cloth, bath, hair cuts, and more for my kids and I do without new things.

Just the mediation is throwing me off but the lady was trying to scare me saying if we went back to court it would be month(s) process and that it would be worse to go back to court. I don't get it though why would the mediation lady  try to scare me and make it so I wouldn't want to go to court for it?


by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 4:01 PM

 In most states, a judge WILL NOT take the child from either parent unless there is proof that harm will come to him/her such as the parent does drugs, is violent, etc....mediation is set up for you two to agree on a schedule of some sorts to see your son.  Usually one parent will be the primary in custody even if both parents share the time with the child.  You will NOT lose your son so don't worry.  Go into the mediation with an idea of what you are willing to agree on, don't get pushed around.  Good luck!!

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