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Does your Ex stalk your online activities? For instance, finding your posting here on CafeMom?

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My daughter's dad, threw an amazing temper tantrum and blew up my phone in endless text messages last night. Some of his commentary clearly leads me to conclude he had searched for me online and found me posting here. 

I know he is obsessed like that, at least he was about the woman he was with prior to me. During our entire relationship he obsessed about her and followed her to great lengths online, always finding her blogs and postings even when she'd change names and web sites. I didn't think he would do it to me, because he made it clear I meant nothing to him, but last night some of his nasty comments to me via text make it pretty clear he has come here. It is sad, that I can't have my opinions and share them with other single mothers without being verbally abused for it.

I could have used another handle on here, but I don't feel I need to hide anything. He knows what I think of him and his life style, he knows my opinion of everything, I speak freely to him about it and hide nothing. So it isn't like anything he might read here is a surprise. 

Do any of you other mothers feel like you are constantly being followed and spied on - in your online life? Do you fear your ex will see what you write here?

by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 7:27 PM
Replies (11-20):
erinmomofone
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 9:46 PM
This!


Quoting angelam0580:

Fortunately for me my ex is to stupid to find me on here :)

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
raegan1221
by Raegan on Oct. 9, 2012 at 9:48 PM

 No that's ridiculous. You shouldn't have to censor anything you do because of toddlers lurking around you. I'm sorry you have to deal with this. But you can find some good private groups here where they cannot see what you post.

Quoting Barblicious:

It does feel like an invasion of privacy. It feel like every time I post now, I have him lurking somewhere over my shoulder ready to twist what I might post into some drama.

His sister was on my facebook for a while, then I found out she was showing him my private informtaion, and sharing it with him. It was such and invasion of my privacy for her to do that. 

I have a blog and I am very careful about what I write, but here I feel more free to discuss things, after all it is an open forum for single mothers. Should feel I have to censor everything I post here?

Quoting raegan1221:

 No...not that I am aware of. If my ex or any of my ex bf's did it or whoever..they wouldn't find anything juicy or anything I don't want them knowing/seeing. However I would feel an incredible feeling of invasion of privacy.

 

 

Faith, Hope & Love "I Will Have Faith in YOU, Hope For YOU To Come Home To Me & Love YOU More Every Day".
Barblicious
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 9:48 PM

LOL Awesome answer.

Quoting angelam0580:

Fortunately for me my ex is to stupid to find me on here :)


JakesMom712
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 9:49 PM
Yup. That's why i usually bitch about him anon in mc lol
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
angelam0580
by Member on Oct. 9, 2012 at 9:50 PM
Thanks :) he really is, when we were together he could barely get the computer on without my help lol.


Quoting Barblicious:

LOL Awesome answer.


Quoting angelam0580:

Fortunately for me my ex is to stupid to find me on here :)



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
graciefreesoul
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 9:50 PM

we don't talk to him...matter of fact it's been so long (going on 10 of my daughter's 13 years?) that he prolly doesn't remember my name to look me up lol

Barblicious
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 9:56 PM

I really like this Single Mothers forum, so far of all the groups (that I've tried) it seems to have the nicest women in it. Also I don't want to start feeling pressured to go hide away in case he's reading. That is not fair to me. He controlled me for many years, he is so not going to control me now.

Quoting raegan1221:

 No that's ridiculous. You shouldn't have to censor anything you do because of toddlers lurking around you. I'm sorry you have to deal with this. But you can find some good private groups here where they cannot see what you post.

Quoting Barblicious:

It does feel like an invasion of privacy. It feel like every time I post now, I have him lurking somewhere over my shoulder ready to twist what I might post into some drama.

His sister was on my facebook for a while, then I found out she was showing him my private informtaion, and sharing it with him. It was such and invasion of my privacy for her to do that. 

I have a blog and I am very careful about what I write, but here I feel more free to discuss things, after all it is an open forum for single mothers. Should feel I have to censor everything I post here?

Quoting raegan1221:

 No...not that I am aware of. If my ex or any of my ex bf's did it or whoever..they wouldn't find anything juicy or anything I don't want them knowing/seeing. However I would feel an incredible feeling of invasion of privacy.


 


raegan1221
by Raegan on Oct. 9, 2012 at 9:58 PM

 That's a great attitude to have! Then I wouldn't worry about him..let him lurk and realize what he lost. I know it's ridiculous he does it but I guess if you have to deal with it, have fun with it. Lol. He'll just see what a great girl he had.

Quoting Barblicious:

I really like this Single Mothers forum, so far of all the groups (that I've tried) it seems to have the nicest women in it. Also I don't want to start feeling pressured to go hide away in case he's reading. That is not fair to me. He controlled me for many years, he is so not going to control me now.

Quoting raegan1221:

 No that's ridiculous. You shouldn't have to censor anything you do because of toddlers lurking around you. I'm sorry you have to deal with this. But you can find some good private groups here where they cannot see what you post.

Quoting Barblicious:

It does feel like an invasion of privacy. It feel like every time I post now, I have him lurking somewhere over my shoulder ready to twist what I might post into some drama.

His sister was on my facebook for a while, then I found out she was showing him my private informtaion, and sharing it with him. It was such and invasion of my privacy for her to do that. 

I have a blog and I am very careful about what I write, but here I feel more free to discuss things, after all it is an open forum for single mothers. Should feel I have to censor everything I post here?

Quoting raegan1221:

 No...not that I am aware of. If my ex or any of my ex bf's did it or whoever..they wouldn't find anything juicy or anything I don't want them knowing/seeing. However I would feel an incredible feeling of invasion of privacy.

 

 

 

 

Faith, Hope & Love "I Will Have Faith in YOU, Hope For YOU To Come Home To Me & Love YOU More Every Day".
Barblicious
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 9:58 PM

Sometimes I wonder if that would be such a bad thing, if my daughter's dad would just disappear. I know my life would be easier...

Does your daughter ever wonder about him? 

Quoting graciefreesoul:

we don't talk to him...matter of fact it's been so long (going on 10 of my daughter's 13 years?) that he prolly doesn't remember my name to look me up lol


MicahBoo07
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 10:01 PM

 Just keep doing what u are doing. Nothing wrong with venting, getting advice, or giving advice in a group of any sort. If he feels the need to read what u write then he is lame and won't stop until he gets to the next end of a relationship. Did u ever talk to the girl he was doing it to before u? He prolly told her the same that he didn't care and wanted nothing to do with her but then he started being creepy. Just save his text he sends u in case u need to file for a restraining order of no contact to u.

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