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Divorce Letter had to share

I found this on facebook I wanted to share.
BEST DIVORCE LETTER EVER

Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favo
rite meal
& even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.

Your EX-Husband

P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!

P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem.
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 3:40 PM
Replies (11-17):
kayshalea
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 7:28 PM
Lol I already knew what this was before I opened it
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
cece5000
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:59 AM

lol

proudmother5946
by Member on Oct. 12, 2012 at 7:30 AM
Funny!!!
When my ex decided that he wasn't "happy" with me anymore and kicked me and DD to the curb, he didn't think of this one little thing. That when my mom died, my brother and I inherited a butt load of money. Now he has to go to work and I've retired. He still has to pay me CS too.
My mom made me promise that I would never go back to him and that he'd never see a penny of her money.
Whose laughing now?
kary1124
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 9:39 AM

wow thats funny


steviechick
by Gold Member on Oct. 12, 2012 at 2:13 PM

Not so funny - my ex-FIL has disowned my ex.  He has changed his will to reflect that his two legitimate grandchildren (my daughter and my ex-BIL's son) will get some of his inheritance.  The other half goes to my ex-BIL.  I can't say I blame my ex-FIL.  My ex is a selfish piece of garbage. 

mamalena137
by Bronze Member on Oct. 12, 2012 at 4:10 PM

Very funny, made me laugh. I needed that

ImaSoulMom
by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 1:43 AM
Love it!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
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