Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

O.D.D. teenager advice needed!!!!

Posted by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 4:07 PM
  • 9 Replies
Am just out of thoughts..dont know what to do. My son just has giving me the hardest challenge in my life!! anyone who has a defiant child please some advice.. well literally the dr has not confirm that he is o.d.d. but with my research all signs points he is. Am a single mom with 3 boys and hes my oldest 14 yrs old. Ive been having lots of patience but every day is a struggle with him. If possible it would be great to meet with other moms who have this exact problem as they say only one who is going through the same thing will understand is not all parents fault. Am tired of family critizing my parening skills and blaming me for not be more strict and hes bad behavior. Thank you for taking the time reading my comment...:'(
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 4:07 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-9):
faerie75
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 4:53 PM

 i hve a 14 year old son with diagnosed adhd and odd. it is not fun thats for sure.

i dont know, i make the rules up as i go. whe he was young, i found that spanking was ineffective. he would kick everyones ass the next day. i try to focus on the positive and reinforce good behavior.

i also have odd/adhd. i understand how my son feels. i also understand how frustrated my mom used to get. its not even evilness that makes us this way. its having problems with expectations. even if its not something i really hate doing, if i find out its expected of me, i feel like "well i dont want to do that" not even maliciously. its hard to explain.

brieri
by Platinum Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 4:55 PM

 Hi and welcome to the grou;\p.

 

cbad
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 5:07 PM
Yes i really try to understand him but sinve i dont know much or know anyone who is going through with the same is so hard especially having my other 2 boys and they are so different. He doesnt care for any rules and cannot make him go nowhere. He just wants to go agains everything i say or that we have to do like do laundry..Well guess just gonna suck for me and have to go day by day..no family help or therapist help either..guess for this times is up to parents only..thanx for ur support


Quoting faerie75:

 i hve a 14 year old son with diagnosed adhd and odd. it is not fun thats for sure.


i dont know, i make the rules up as i go. whe he was young, i found that spanking was ineffective. he would kick everyones ass the next day. i try to focus on the positive and reinforce good behavior.


i also have odd/adhd. i understand how my son feels. i also understand how frustrated my mom used to get. its not even evilness that makes us this way. its having problems with expectations. even if its not something i really hate doing, if i find out its expected of me, i feel like "well i dont want to do that" not even maliciously. its hard to explain.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
faerie75
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 5:16 PM

 try giving him a choice in what chore to do daily. mine chose dishes. he does them. he complains but i remind him he chose to do dishes.

what does he do? mine is not violent and he stays home and doesnt run the street. but getting him to do his school work is like pulling teeth, he gets in trouble with his teachers for doing dumb shit and he can be mouthy.

 

cbad
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:04 PM
Well he does nothing after school..not doing school work either. He doesnt go nowhere but school ..store if is something to get Him...a friends house that we go to. He doesnt help around the house unless is his things he will clean up only. He doesnt go to steets yet! Every suggestion i have for him answer is no. All he wants is xbox which i took away before school started. All his ansers are so..i dont care..I dont have to and I dont want to..oh and before all that is Why??!! I told him when all his classed are passing he can play xbox but he didnt want to do tutorials nd now with first report card he probably fail all classes. On weekend he doesnt care to do nothing but be hone and recently he told me he doesnt tell me he wants to go out because I ask too many questions (2 is already alot for him)...
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Robsessed98
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:17 PM
My oldest dd was diagnosed with adhd, odd, and mixed bipolar when she was pretty young. Even with psychologists, behavioral therapy, medication and me trying every technique I came across, raising her was very trying. Good news is after a few years she learned to control her actions and behavior and life became much easier.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
faerie75
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:52 PM

 is he interested in any sports? my son is in football and if he is failing he cant play. it is also good for him to get energy out because if he does not get exercise, he gets ragey (im am the same). he has ps3 and sometimes i hate it. he gets hyper focused on it to almost obsession. i make him tkae a break. but if i take shit aw3ay, he does not care. thats why i try to give him positive goals if he does stuff as well as take things if he doesnt. i also tell him thigns like "i know you dont want to do this, i really dont want to go to work and support you but we all have to do things we dont want, its the real world. i would rather be doing something fun than cooking you dinner too" sort of gives him perspective.

Quoting cbad:

Well he does nothing after school..not doing school work either. He doesnt go nowhere but school ..store if is something to get Him...a friends house that we go to. He doesnt help around the house unless is his things he will clean up only. He doesnt go to steets yet! Every suggestion i have for him answer is no. All he wants is xbox which i took away before school started. All his ansers are so..i dont care..I dont have to and I dont want to..oh and before all that is Why??!! I told him when all his classed are passing he can play xbox but he didnt want to do tutorials nd now with first report card he probably fail all classes. On weekend he doesnt care to do nothing but be hone and recently he told me he doesnt tell me he wants to go out because I ask too many questions (2 is already alot for him)...

 

 
        
         

Zacknalexmom
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 7:38 PM
I don't have a odd childbut my neighbor does has a son who is odd and bipolar. Her son is in the 4th grade and I know she has a time with him. I had to stop my kids from playing with him due to him having a potty mouth. I know he takes all sorts of meds and he also goes to a therapist. Good luck.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
cbad
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 8:22 PM
Hes not interested in any sports says everything is boring xcept xbox!! i try to have positive thinking and get goals but he doesnt care to do nothing.


For neighbor with bipolar child- thats the thing he doesnt even have real friends and he doesnt really have a potty mouth..ive tried to have him go out with cousins nd friends nd diesnt want to..he just says no nd tht is gonna b boring nd i cant take tht hought out of his mind...
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)