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why should i file for custody?

my son has my last name

his dad pays child support but has barely seen his son

he texts every now and then but nothing consistent so I can't really say that he will fight it if I request full custody

he probably wont mind

I am more than happy to have a parenting plan and visitation set up but it seems that he may not care

so shall I still file and waste time in court?

 

by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:51 AM
Replies (11-20):
kayshalea
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:25 PM
I wouldn't unless you felt you needed too. I live in Ohio so my son's dad can't just take him. If he keeps him longer than I think he should all I have to do is call the police. They will come and make him return him.
Since me and his dad are friends I just let him get him whenever. If he calls right now to get him for 3 days I will say okay and pack his bags. If he needs me to keep his other kids I will say okay. We learned how to work out things without court.
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Robsessed98
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 1:49 PM
A court order sets a certain time for visitation and child support. He has to follow it or else pay the consequences. He doesnt have to take his visitation time, but thats up to him. Without a court order, if he decides he doesnt want to pay support, theres nothing you can do about it. Same goea for visitation, without an order he can come whenever he wants and even take the child wherever he wants for as long as he wants and you wont have a legal leg to stand on. Just because yall are working together now on support and he isnt seeing the baby, doesnt mean he wont do the complete opposite tomorrow. Youd be foolish to leave the support and well being of the baby up to chance.
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ballerossandra
by Member on Oct. 12, 2012 at 2:22 PM
Quoting Robsessed98:

A court order sets a certain time for visitation and child support. He has to follow it or else pay the consequences. He doesnt have to take his visitation time, but thats up to him. Without a court order, if he decides he doesnt want to pay support, theres nothing you can do about it. Same goea for visitation, without an order he can come whenever he wants and even take the child wherever he wants for as long as he wants and you wont have a legal leg to stand on. Just because yall are working together now on support and he isnt seeing the baby, doesnt mean he wont do the complete opposite tomorrow. Youd be foolish to leave the support and well being of the baby up to chance.

there is a court order for support
ballerossandra
by Member on Oct. 12, 2012 at 2:24 PM
Quoting kayshalea:

I wouldn't unless you felt you needed too. I live in Ohio so my son's dad can't just take him. If he keeps him longer than I think he should all I have to do is call the police. They will come and make him return him.
Since me and his dad are friends I just let him get him whenever. If he calls right now to get him for 3 days I will say okay and pack his bags. If he needs me to keep his other kids I will say okay. We learned how to work out things without court.

that was my thinking but if he hasn't so far, I don't know if he will
PeaceLoveZ
by Member on Oct. 12, 2012 at 4:55 PM

I'm same as you, I haven't filed. (it's been 2 years since we've been apart)
My dad had an agreement with his first wife regarding my brother, well she got mad over something stupid one day, and when my brother went from my dad's to hers, she up and left to Florida, before my dad even knew she had an apartment and a lawyer and had filed for custody down there, my dad was trying for full, but since the 6 months of residency was established by the time they were able to get a court date my dad had no chance. It's really sad b/c my brother, now in his 30s, missed all that time with my dad & the rest of us all b/c of not wasting time in court in the beginning.

miss_AP
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 6:58 PM

Because then its iron clad nad you are protected in case he gets a bee in his bonnet...or someone starts whispering in his ear!

Zacknalexmom
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 7:12 PM
Agree

Quoting BelleVernonGirl:

I suggest you do b/c if there is no custody agreement then your sons dad could take him and there's nothing you can do about it.  It's not considered kidnapping or anything without the custody order. 

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fizzgig4
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 7:29 PM
Absolutely true!


Quoting BelleVernonGirl:

I suggest you do b/c if there is no custody agreement then your sons dad could take him and there's nothing you can do about it.  It's not considered kidnapping or anything without the custody order. 


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tyfry7496
by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:00 AM
I agree also. It's to protect your child.

Quoting Zacknalexmom:

Agree



Quoting BelleVernonGirl:

I suggest you do b/c if there is no custody agreement then your sons dad could take him and there's nothing you can do about it.  It's not considered kidnapping or anything without the custody order. 

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edithch
by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 2:28 AM
Its just best. Belive it or not some men from one day to another chainge their minds and come around when kids are older claiming they want to be around and want rights. If you do it now you will have controle now and then...
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