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just venting... thank u for all who read

Posted by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 9:54 AM
  • 6 Replies
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For starters i have a one an half yr old.. an his father left me when i was 4 monthes pregnant... we were only together for a few monthes before i got pregnant... my son was my lessing from god he truly is... well thats not what i am venting about... the entire time i was pregnant his father was calling me an sending me HORRIBLE text messages, like telling me if i didnt answer the phone he'd blow his brains out, calling me all kinds of horrible name etc. well hes from new york an i am from rhode island an when he left he went home to his moms in ny... now that was about 2 yrs ago. when my son was about 2 months old i met the most amazing guy that excepted the fact i was a young mom an i had baggage an said he was willing to work with me an help me... well i told my sons father i didnt want to talk to him ne more an i told him that i wasnt going to be threatened to speak to him any more... well the night before i changed my number he called me over 70 times i had over 100 text messages an upteen voice mails an i mean they were ruthless just plain rotten telling me that my son wasnt his, that i am all kinds of horrible thing such as a whore an hoe an tramp etc... it got to the point i started crying i never answered the phone so the messgaes were getting worse an the night went on... the next morning i changed my number i made my fb profile completely private i stopped speaking to everyone we had known together so he couldnt find me or find out ne thing that was happing in my life.... well back in october of 2011 i had gotten a yahoo instant message an it was him... how he got my number i have no idea an he wazs telling me he was so sorry an he wanted to know his son blah blah so i was a sucker an i except the messages an i talk to him.... well my sons father hes a "traveling hippie" so when i was getting the messages he was on the road traveling he told me over na over for monthes he was coming home... (NEVER DID) then there would be weeks of silence he wouldnt say ne thing an id think ok hes gone hes finally going to leave me alone an then hed pop back in an start messaging me again... but his messages were gettng creepy like he was saying things to me as in he knew here i was going durring my days an he knew where my parents are living now an etc things he shouldnt know so i stopped responding to his messages... in hopes he would go away an leave me an my son alone... he has 5 other kids that he has nothing to do with from all over the u.s. an honestly i dont want him around my son hes pycho he sent me a picture of a shotgun once an said he was going to blow his brains out if i didnt answer my phone.... before he left (the reason he left) we had a domestic together i had gone out to the county fair in my town that comes once a yr an when i came home he was drunk i mean wasted drunk an he destroyed my apartment flipped my solid marble kitchen table, smashed my tv just trashed the place an so he got arrested an he blamed me for why he got arrested... because i went out an he couldnt go so he was "hurt" so he said he wanted to let me know how hurt he was... well after this incident i got kicked out of my apartment an i had to move into a tent in one of his friends backyards.... in this time my grandfather had surgery an had stage 4 lung cancer ( i didnt know i was pregnant yet) so my mom came down an told me what was going on an said bc she worked 3rd shift she couldnt take care of my grandfather... so of course i said i would so he wouldnt have to go into a nursing home... so me an anthony moved in wih my grandfather.... my grandfather was parralized bc of his surgery so he was wheel chair bound... after being there for a few weeks i found out i was pregnant an thats when it all went down hill... my sons father was fighting with my 24/7 an leaving all day an all night, an i was stuck inside bc i couldnt leave so i had to take care of my grandfather by myself while dealing with morning sickness an pains from being prego an he didnt care... well we had a restarining order bc of our domestic so we couldnt go out together an wheni was 4 months pregnant he left in the middle of the night an sent me a text message saying he was on a bus to new york an hes never coming back.. that same night he sent my mother a text message while she was at work an told her to take good care of his baby that she will be a better daddy to his baby then he will be... i cried for days... an thats when the horible texts an stuff started............... omg that feels so good to let come out, i havent been able to tell anyone about all this... thank you for listening to my rambling i just had to get that all out there like i had to tell someone... thank you

by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 9:54 AM
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Replies (1-6):
mommy_2_be_2010
by Bronze Member on Oct. 12, 2012 at 10:24 AM
Ur ex sounds like my daughters,dad only he lives not too far from me across the play ground smh.......
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devynsmommy09
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 11:07 AM

That sounds a lot like my ex.

There is a book called "Why Does He Do That: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" and it helped me understand.  People like him don't change on their own...and the abuse is about power.  So until he wants to get help there is really nothing you can do. 

I'm so sorry that  you have to go through that!  Be safe girl.  Document EVERYTHING.  Only communicate with him via email, most family courts won't allow text messages. 

Good luck!

faerie75
by Ruby Member on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:01 PM

 id jsut ignore his attempts at contact. if hes serious, he can take you to court. dont even reply at all.

iHay
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:10 PM
So i have one question. Are you with the amazing guy you met now? Or did i read that wrong?
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otoole
by Bronze Member on Oct. 12, 2012 at 12:27 PM

i was wondering the same. you still with him?? if so tell him whats going on, i don't think he would be to happy that you and your ex are talking. also im sure you can go to the cops and show them the messages, so they have a record of you reporting your crazy ex. tell you ex you are no longer talking to him and if he contacts you again, the cops will arrest him. seriouly he is nuts and sounds dangerous. i know hes your sons dad but its not worth having him in his life when he doesn't care.

Quoting iHay:

So i have one question. Are you with the amazing guy you met now? Or did i read that wrong?


Robsessed98
by on Oct. 12, 2012 at 1:18 PM
This dude has issues. I would totally ignore his messages, but keep all of them in case he ever tries to get you in court. I would probably try to get a PO based on the messages.
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