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Feel like ex-mil still plans to take my kids

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When i picked up my kids on saturday. The ex fil and mil always say something. They use about two days out of the month because they "don't want any fighting". He visits the kids at their house and they sometimes ask if he called me without their knowledge. If they want to run his life fine. Their controlling nature took a huge toll on the marriage. But oh well, that is done.

I was trying to get my two year old his medicine and they mentioned they are leaving town and asked if i wanted ex to visit. I said that is up to him but I am the one being the parent and doing my share of the parenting and his. Ex-mil mumbles "yeah For Now" and ex fil starts saying how they appreciate all i do blah blah. That "for now" really bothered me.

From the moment I had our first son ex mil was urging him to divorce me and try to get custody. Then when we argued she would give him money to stay at a hotel as long as he promised to leave. I was five months pregnant with second son. He was gone for a week and from then forward was constantly leaving.

When we were divorcing he would tell me "when they are older they can decide to live with me". Then i got custody and she is being super nice. It seems she still wants to try to get my kids away from me.

Any thoughts? I doubt she will ever stop. During the divorce she even called cps. They closed the case but this is exhausting. Is there anything I can do?
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by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 2:01 AM
Replies (11-20):
Robsessed98
by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 12:13 AM
The best thing to do is keep your nose clean so if it comes to a custody dispute they will have no grounds for it to change. Otherwise be very courteous to them but pay no attention to what they say.
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ImaSoulMom
by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 12:16 AM
She called them once he served me with the divorce papers. I answered all the questions and cooperated in the investigation. They closed the case. Pretty sure she will call again.




Quoting brieri:

So you want CPS involved?


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ImaSoulMom
by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 12:17 AM
Thank you. That is exactly what I plan on doing. :)


Quoting Robsessed98:

The best thing to do is keep your nose clean so if it comes to a custody dispute they will have no grounds for it to change. Otherwise be very courteous to them but pay no attention to what they say.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
brieri
by Platinum Member on Oct. 24, 2012 at 1:26 AM

Quoting ImaSoulMom:

She called them once he served me with the divorce papers. I answered all the questions and cooperated in the investigation. They closed the case. Pretty sure she will call again.




Quoting brieri:

So you want CPS involved?


 What says they will call again? What state do you live in?

ImaSoulMom
by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 2:51 AM
Texas. Honestly, it's just a feeling. No matter how often i can prove i am a good mom and how much i love my little boys she does not care. Things have to be done her way. If i say i like the boys with long hair, she will shave it. When i took my pediatrician's word over hers "doctors don't know everything". It's exhausting but i hope one day we can at least get along for the boys.
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sniklefritz
by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 3:01 AM

God. they sound ignorant,,how do you keep from slapping the dog snot out of them??

Quoting ImaSoulMom:

This has been since my first son was born. When she said "spare the rod spoil the child" i told her i didn't believe in spanking. She said to put q tips in my son's ears and i cleaned them with a wash cloth. For differences like these, they would tell me that they could take my kids. They are used to their son doing what they ask without question. Disagreeing made them pretty furious. Even though her son is an absentee father, they are still convinced their parenting methods are 100% right.


Quoting Jennyanne322:

Why do they want you away from your children? Have you ever given them reason to feel you are an unfit mother?


brieri
by Platinum Member on Oct. 24, 2012 at 3:22 AM

 

Quoting ImaSoulMom:

Texas. Honestly, it's just a feeling. No matter how often i can prove i am a good mom and how much i love my little boys she does not care. Things have to be done her way. If i say i like the boys with long hair, she will shave it. When i took my pediatrician's word over hers "doctors don't know everything". It's exhausting but i hope one day we can at least get along for the boys.

 As long as the kids are in your care, probably the judge is never going to change the kids to him. Dk how your state works, but that's what happened to me.  I gave the children to him on a temp basis, and blew into a fully custody situation, and he caused it all, but yet everyone is looking at me like I am not a good mom. I am constantly being accused that I don't get along with others.  I simply have emotional problems because of it now and will be with me for the rest of my life. 

ImaSoulMom
by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 12:25 PM
I'm sorry you had to go through that. When people try to use your kids to hurt you and don't see how it affects our babies it can cause emotional damage that stays with you. Be strong! :)


Quoting brieri:

 


Quoting ImaSoulMom:

Texas. Honestly, it's just a feeling. No matter how often i can prove i am a good mom and how much i love my little boys she does not care. Things have to be done her way. If i say i like the boys with long hair, she will shave it. When i took my pediatrician's word over hers "doctors don't know everything". It's exhausting but i hope one day we can at least get along for the boys.

 As long as the kids are in your care, probably the judge is never going to change the kids to him. Dk how your state works, but that's what happened to me.  I gave the children to him on a temp basis, and blew into a fully custody situation, and he caused it all, but yet everyone is looking at me like I am not a good mom. I am constantly being accused that I don't get along with others.  I simply have emotional problems because of it now and will be with me for the rest of my life. 


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
ImaSoulMom
by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 12:28 PM
Ha ha! Not going to lie....i get the urge! ;)


Quoting sniklefritz:

God. they sound ignorant,,how do you keep from slapping the dog snot out of them??

Quoting ImaSoulMom:

This has been since my first son was born. When she said "spare the rod spoil the child" i told her i didn't believe in spanking. She said to put q tips in my son's ears and i cleaned them with a wash cloth. For differences like these, they would tell me that they could take my kids. They are used to their son doing what they ask without question. Disagreeing made them pretty furious. Even though her son is an absentee father, they are still convinced their parenting methods are 100% right.





Quoting Jennyanne322:

Why do they want you away from your children? Have you ever given them reason to feel you are an unfit mother?




Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
kim8934
by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 12:39 PM

be ready with a comment back next time.  Something like 'keep you comments to yourself or I will make sure you never see your grandkids again."  I think shock the shit out of her would work best, I had an ex-MIL like that.

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