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I do not get it

Posted by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 10:24 AM
  • 10 Replies
How the heck can these guys not care about their kids at all?
I last spoke to my ex about 2 years ago (i was 2 months pregnant). I left him and he went and got married and had another kid. Not a single word since.
Why don't they care?
In my case I am happy he doesn't because he was an abusive ass but what about all the other guys who seem like good people? How can they just leave their kid.
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by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 10:24 AM
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Replies (1-10):
PoplarGrove
by Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 10:59 AM

I don't know.  My ex left in June, leaving me with a 12, 9,6 and 4 year old.  At first he'd see them every two weeks, then every month and now it's been 2 months since he's spent any real time with them (he came and took them to dinner for an hour a few weeks ago but that was it).  I foresee that by next year it'll be every 3 months or more if I don't continue bugging him to see them.  When he's with them he plays the doting devoted father but you need to actually see your kids to be devoted to them.  

tyfry7496
by Janet on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:00 PM
How can a mother walk away from her child? It's not just men. That's a question that will never get an answer.
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CaptainCookie
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:44 PM

 My soon to be ex is the same way. I had to move in with my sister. He knows where she lives. Its only been a month and a half since my daughter and I have moved away from him but he hasn't visited her at all since we left. And has only spoke to her on the phone once because I made him. Yet I get countless messages from him on facebook about how much he misses her and "tell her I love her." Well, if you miss and love her so much then why the hell haven't you seen her? Why did it take me making you talk to her on the phone for you to actually do it?

Not to mention he was supposed to have lunch with her at school on monday and tuesday of this week. He never showed either day.

Yep. You sure do love her and miss her, don't you? Douche bag!

strngenough
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 1:22 PM
The answers I've been told by men when I asked why this happens:

Can't deal with the ex/ex makes it too hard

It hurts too much to only see them every once in awhile. Guys don't deal with pain well so it's easier to block the whole situation and start over.

Didn't want to have a kid.

And the kid is not being raised/acting/living how they want their kid too and two weekends a month isn't enough to fix it.
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ms-superwoman
by Bronze Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 1:24 PM
a06z08mama
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 1:26 PM
Very true!! My ex has a gf that signed away her two daughters like it was nothing to her. My own "mother" did the same thing to me and my sister. She chose her hub over us.


Quoting tyfry7496:

How can a mother walk away from her child? It's not just men. That's a question that will never get an answer.

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Youngmother456
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 4:03 PM
Wow I am sorry.


Quoting PoplarGrove:

I don't know.  My ex left in June, leaving me with a 12, 9,6 and 4 year old.  At first he'd see them every two weeks, then every month and now it's been 2 months since he's spent any real time with them (he came and took them to dinner for an hour a few weeks ago but that was it).  I foresee that by next year it'll be every 3 months or more if I don't continue bugging him to see them.  When he's with them he plays the doting devoted father but you need to actually see your kids to be devoted to them.  


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Youngmother456
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 4:04 PM
I know it is not just men IMO the women who do it are worse than the men


Quoting tyfry7496:

How can a mother walk away from her child? It's not just men. That's a question that will never get an answer.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Youngmother456
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 4:06 PM
Wow that is really shitty to let her down like that.


Quoting CaptainCookie:

 My soon to be ex is the same way. I had to move in with my sister. He knows where she lives. Its only been a month and a half since my daughter and I have moved away from him but he hasn't visited her at all since we left. And has only spoke to her on the phone once because I made him. Yet I get countless messages from him on facebook about how much he misses her and "tell her I love her." Well, if you miss and love her so much then why the hell haven't you seen her? Why did it take me making you talk to her on the phone for you to actually do it?


Not to mention he was supposed to have lunch with her at school on monday and tuesday of this week. He never showed either day.


Yep. You sure do love her and miss her, don't you? Douche bag!


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Robsessed98
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 9:18 PM
3 moms liked this
Some people are just wired that way. Out of sight out of mind. Its sad, but thats just how it is and the child is the one who suffers for it.
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