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Single Moms Single Moms

What should i do?!

Posted by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 10:05 PM
  • 15 Replies
Hello my name is stephanie and im new to this. I have a situation with my daughters father. We have been broken up for almost two years and have never gone to court for the baby. I have a great job offer but its out of state. Im not sure if i can just leave without cusdoy or if i have to do it before i leave. Him and i have never been married but he is on her birth certificet and she has his last name. He doesn't see her much maybe two days out of the week. He causes a lot of problems between him and i. He never really provides for her. Im despreat for help in this because i have no idea what to do.
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by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 10:05 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Robsessed98
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 10:13 PM
In OK, if he's on the bc, he is the legal father and he can stop you from taking his child out of state. your state could be different so you need to contact an attorney. You need to file for custody immediately and work it out through the court. You dont want to take a chance on being charged with kidnapping your own child, but it could happen.
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cklamour
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 10:17 PM
I agree with this.

Sadly a man can leave the planet with no issues but SINGLE MOTHERS, we receive all kinds of bull that we have to jump through.

Good luck Hun!


Quoting Robsessed98:

In OK, if he's on the bc, he is the legal father and he can stop you from taking his child out of state. your state could be different so you need to contact an attorney. You need to file for custody immediately and work it out through the court. You dont want to take a chance on being charged with kidnapping your own child, but it could happen.
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WowzaMom
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 10:21 PM

Hi Stephanie. Ok-if I understand this then you are a single mom who has never been married to your daughters father. You are the primary caregiver and there are no custody orders currently in place. You should be able to leave the state without any legal repercussions. I would check with a family attorney who specializes in custody disputes just to be on the safe side b/c these laws vary from state to state - the consultation will probably run about $100, but it will be worth it for your peace of mind. 

Steffieloo
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 10:21 PM
I have read that as well in CO. I guess the best thing to do is file. Im just really scared he might win custody for some crazy reason. I just hope the court realizes that he isn't capable of taking care of a chiled mostly because of his TBI.
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LifeCafe42
by Nora on Nov. 28, 2012 at 11:43 PM
Welcome!
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easinpc
by Gold Member on Nov. 29, 2012 at 9:07 AM

Contact an attorney in your area to file the correct paperwork to make sure you can legally take your child.  I would hate for you to take her only to lose custody because it wasn't done properly.  Good luck!

steviechick
by Gold Member on Nov. 29, 2012 at 9:16 AM

I think the only problem you have is the removal of the child out of state.  Once you contact an atty and he checks things out the next step is to set-up child support.  I wouldn't worry about the father being able to gain full custody.  He's already proven he can't be a decent guardian to his own child.  You have already proven this AND are looking into the legal way of taking your daughter out of state.  This will go over positive in court.  ALL plusses on your side. 

easinpc
by Gold Member on Nov. 29, 2012 at 9:20 AM

i agree with this as well

Quoting Robsessed98:

In OK, if he's on the bc, he is the legal father and he can stop you from taking his child out of state. your state could be different so you need to contact an attorney. You need to file for custody immediately and work it out through the court. You dont want to take a chance on being charged with kidnapping your own child, but it could happen.


Steffieloo
by on Nov. 29, 2012 at 12:39 PM
Thank you all for your help.
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lizlaughlove
by on Nov. 29, 2012 at 1:13 PM

In order for me to get special medical care for my son, I had to have a court order saying that I had that authority. Without those court papers, he'd have been denied the mental health care he needed (which is no way related to being seperated from his father). I moved our children out of state too. 

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