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Should I....

Posted by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 10:52 AM
  • 15 Replies

I am dating the most amazing man ever.   We both have our own house but find ourselves spending time at my house during the week due to I have to work and his house on the weekends.   We both have children, his oldest is on his own and they younger one who is 13 lives w his mom and wants to come live w his dad in may.   I have two children, my youngest is 11 the oldest is 18.   My 18 plans to join the service in june and wont be home.   My youngest adores my s/o.   We keep talking about moving in together, save expenses.   His house is paid for and I have a house that is paid for but dont live there due to its to close to my exhubby.  I came from such a horriable marriage, that it tends to stick in your mind...I just dont know.   I am scared.   I keep asking and doubting myself.   If we do and something happens then what...I know I have a place to go and could easily find a place but I am still scared.   His son could really use the furnishings in my house so thats not an issue either.   Should I jump and move in with him?   We have an amazing relationship, never fuss or fight and if we do get upset about something we have the rule to talk about it when we are calm.   He is a dream come true in my life....PLease advise me as to what to do....

by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 10:52 AM
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Replies (1-10):
victoriahearts
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 10:59 AM
1 mom liked this

Life is always about taking chance even when they scare you, the fact is that you wont know how good or bad it is until you try it, the fact is that if he does workout it will be a step forward in an already good relationship and if it doesn't you have a secure and safe place to go. You can't gain anything if you don't take risk sometimes.

beach40
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 11:03 AM

Your very right.   I jumped when I left my ex-husband.   I guess I am just scared....mental abuse takes along time to heal.  

victoriahearts
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 11:06 AM

I can't relate or imagine how hard it must have been to endure mental abuse, but it seem like you are stronger now, you started dating, found a wonderful man, I would let things take it course and I know that if things don't go right you will be the first to see the signs.

SnapIt
by Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 11:07 AM
You never know until you do it
Perception is worse than the reality as they say

If both houses are paid for keep them both. Rent one out and make something from it and that way IF it doesnt work out who ever moved can go back to the house being rented

Dont sell it
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beach40
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 11:09 AM

I did rent it and use the income from it to cover the place I rent now.   I wanted to buy the place I am in but it needs so much work and this was before s/o got so serious.  I may do it after the first of the year.  

beach40
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 11:10 AM

Your very right.   Follow my instincts.   They never fail, I just chose to ignore them...

mamalena137
by Bronze Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 11:35 AM

After coming out of a bad relationship it's always hard to jump in without being scared. The thing is with having your own place you feel like if things don't work out you always have a way out. You just need to really sit and think this through. Hopefully the past can stop influencing your life and decisions. Best wishes.

strngenough
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 11:39 AM
The best decisions I made in life were the ones that were scary so I didn't over think it I just jumped. The ones I had to think about weren't good. I guess if I have to talk myself into it it's wrong.
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Robsessed98
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 11:48 AM
Im not seeing any reason for you to hesitate. Theres never a guarantee relationships will work out forever, but it certainly wont happen if you dont give it your best shot. Grab happiness where you find it and for you thats obviously with him.
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brieri
by Platinum Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 3:14 PM
1 mom liked this

 How long have you known him is the question to asnwer?  If it has been a short while, it may not be a good idea.  Since you say you own your own home, how about renting it out, if it doesn't work, you can always move back. 

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