I'm hoping someone can help me on my situation. I live in Arkansas and have been separated from my children's father for close to 4 years now. He is out of state and I don't have his address. I am not receiving any support from him and when he offers it, it's with a condition that he speaks to the kids. I stopped all communication between him and the children shortly after he left because while we were together he emotionally and physically abused the kids. Then even being 500 miles apart every time he would get on the phone with them they would be back in the emotional state as if he were there for days afterwards. There is no amount of money that would ever convince me to put my children in that spot again. So the situation is I need support I do not have the money it is going to take to hire a lawyer (required in my county for divorce with children) or to start a child support case. I am not receiving any benefits from the state and I'm just at a loss. He has left me with over $12,000 in debt from hot checks he wrote on our joint account (to which I've paid down to $2500 now) and with 4 kids to support on my own and no state assistance I feel very alone and stressed! I'm trying to go to school so I can make more money to support my kids but this seems to consume my every thought. Please if anyone can offer some advice on where to turn I would much appreciate it! Thanks!!
I was married to the same man you were married to. So, I feel your pain. My ex left me with a bunch of debt, too. We signed a settlement agreement but so far he's declared a Chap 7 thus trying to dismiss the money he owes me. Not going to work as you can't dismiss a divorce settlement in court. Ex is very verbally abusive to our DD. She can't even talk to him without him going extreme on her. So, she won't take his phone calls or text him. Really, sad for all of our kids. They deserve better fathers.
My advice is to look for legal aid like the poster mentioned. There has to be free aid for mothers in need. Once you get that aid seek cs ASAP. Also, try and seek temporary restraining order on the ex. Since he has a history of being abusive you don't want your kids to be exposed to that anymore. CS has to be paid no matter the circumstances in a divorce. You have the ex's address and current employer? I would send the employer contempt of court charges once they are in place. They have to adhere to that and then start payments. Good luck. Oh, and welcome to the group!
Quoting a06z08mama:
I live in Iowa and they have Iowa Legal Aid. Do they offer something like that? They give help to low income families or women in need of help. Or maybe contact a law school to see if they offer low cost help to women in situations like yours.
Quoting steviechick:I was married to the same man you were married to. So, I feel your pain. My ex left me with a bunch of debt, too. We signed a settlement agreement but so far he's declared a Chap 7 thus trying to dismiss the money he owes me. Not going to work as you can't dismiss a divorce settlement in court. Ex is very verbally abusive to our DD. She can't even talk to him without him going extreme on her. So, she won't take his phone calls or text him. Really, sad for all of our kids. They deserve better fathers.
My advice is to look for legal aid like the poster mentioned. There has to be free aid for mothers in need. Once you get that aid seek cs ASAP. Also, try and seek temporary restraining order on the ex. Since he has a history of being abusive you don't want your kids to be exposed to that anymore. CS has to be paid no matter the circumstances in a divorce. You have the ex's address and current employer? I would send the employer contempt of court charges once they are in place. They have to adhere to that and then start payments. Good luck. Oh, and welcome to the group!
Quoting Missjenn0829:
They do have that here but it's for those on public aid. TEA and you have to make less than $240 per month to receive that.
Quoting a06z08mama:
I live in Iowa and they have Iowa Legal Aid. Do they offer something like that? They give help to low income families or women in need of help. Or maybe contact a law school to see if they offer low cost help to women in situations like yours.
Quoting a06z08mama:
Oh. That's crap. I know in Iowa Drake university their legal department offers programs to women who need legal assistance. Maybe call around to different universities to see. Not all hopes are lost. Maybe call women shelters to see what advice they can give you as far who to call for legal help.
Quoting Missjenn0829:
They do have that here but it's for those on public aid. TEA and you have to make less than $240 per month to receive that.
Quoting a06z08mama:
I live in Iowa and they have Iowa Legal Aid. Do they offer something like that? They give help to low income families or women in need of help. Or maybe contact a law school to see if they offer low cost help to women in situations like yours.
Are there any churches that could advise you? Help you out in some way?
Abortion
- Missjenn0829
on Dec. 6, 2012 at 10:20 AM