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pissed off. I think im doing whats best?

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im kayla. im 20. i have 2 children my son will be 2 in febuary and my daughter just turned 5 months. they have the same dad. we were on and off for 4 years(abusive relationship). we split when i was about 2-3 months pregnant with my daughter because we were fighting that hed rather waste his money on his boys and fetting high then taking me to the doctor well he got mad and i was holding my son and threw me into a wall. i was still holding my son. i left a week later. as soon as i could. then when i was about 6-7 months preganant we were trying to make it work. he was not there my whole pregnancy with my daughter was not there when i delivered or anything. so about 7 months ago i quit hearing from him. i was told once my daughter was born there had to be 6 months no contact to get his rights removed. well today he texted me! he said. "hey its sonny. how are you? how are our beautiful children? i bet Damian is huge and i bet our daughter is beautiful. what is her name?" i replied "MY children are beautiful and doing amazing no thanks to you. bye"  i mean should i try and talk to him? im mad he even contacted me! he has done nothing not even bought one box of wipes since my son was 8 months!!!! he knew my due date, my daughter is 5 months and just now contacting me like he cares! i mean im just to the point now i no longer miss him or feel i need him! hes never offered to even help financially nor has he seen them. i think he expects me to run back to him. but for what? for him to beat me? to controll me? possibly hurt my kids?

 

 

 

also how do i go about filing for abandonment, full custody, rights removal, child support?

by on Dec. 7, 2012 at 8:13 PM
Replies (11-20):
Jennyanne322
by Bronze Member on Dec. 8, 2012 at 2:49 AM
1 mom liked this
Talk to lawyer. Your children are adorable. Please make your sons chest clip higher. It's suppose to be nipple level, not belly button level. He can go flying out if in a wreck.
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2DsMommy1112
by on Dec. 8, 2012 at 2:57 AM

we dont drive like that. he just buckles it low. idk why but he has to do it himself. but we do push it up

Phillymama123
by on Dec. 8, 2012 at 7:45 AM
1 mom liked this
I know little about this. But I know lawyers would. And social workers at women's shelters would. nd they would have resources. All I know for sure is your kids are so stinking adorable!
Robsessed98
by on Dec. 8, 2012 at 11:53 AM
2 moms liked this
Welcome to the group. You need to find a family attorney. Laws are different in other states.
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LauraMH
by on Dec. 8, 2012 at 11:27 PM

I am sorry you are going through this but understand the feelings completely. I remember getting thrown into a wall holding my son too. I left and keep going back and things never changed. I finally left him in January after almost 9 years together and we got divorced. It was a very difficult process. Courts don't always look at DV as a serious issue and most the people that work in the court are honestly so ignorant about the subject that they do more harm than good. I had previous restraining orders, he had been to prison 3 times for drug related charges, drives without a license and wile under the influence. He threatened to shoot a prefect stranger in font of the kids while our divorce was pending causing the police to be involved and so much more shit that I could name. Yet none of it was taken into consideration by our lawyers, GAL or judge. Not even his treat to kill me that he publicly put on fb. These men are unbelievably good at manipulating anyone and any situation.

Hopefully since he has been out of the picture so long and the state has charges against him it will go much better for you. I don't want this to discourage you, every situation is different, I just want you to be prepared for anything. I wasn't and I wish someone had warned me first. I do suggest filing for sole custody and child support. I don't know about termination of rights though. I did get sole custody in the end, it was just a very difficult battle and he gets a LOT of unsupervised visitation. Good luck to you. Your babies are beautiful.

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Dec. 8, 2012 at 11:28 PM

Welcome!

kagegirl
by on Dec. 9, 2012 at 2:26 AM

If you move for removal of parental rights, that severes your right to child support.

witchybabymomma
by on Dec. 9, 2012 at 2:37 PM

 Best bet for custody is to speak to a good attorney. As far as child support FSD can and should help you with that.

conniejo75
by Bronze Member on Dec. 9, 2012 at 2:40 PM
Not in every state. Otherwise dead beat Dads would just give up rights.


Quoting kagegirl:

If you move for removal of parental rights, that severes your right to child support.


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kagegirl
by on Dec. 10, 2012 at 12:05 AM

True, not every state. But they aren't friggin paying any way. And by not giving parental rights, and the mere fact that non payment of child support really carries no consequences, this usually means they have carte blanche to just fuck with the mom anytime they want.

Quoting conniejo75:

Not in every state. Otherwise dead beat Dads would just give up rights.


Quoting kagegirl:

If you move for removal of parental rights, that severes your right to child support.




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