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Sometimes I hate being a single Mom

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I know It's not fun saying but It's how I feel. I am 6 months pp and almost everyday is a struggle emotionally. Luckily I live with my parents and are helping me woth what theu can. But I can't help feeling like a prisoner. I find myself mourning mhavy old life. Last year I made the stupid decision of having sex with a guy I was just having sex with. Next thing I know I'm pregnant, I was going to abort, but couldn't. I wanted to place my son up for adoption but being Mexican, my mom and I had a bight fight about I kept the baby. Now I have a guy who wants to be part of my son's life and sadly mine...Sometimes I want to sever all contact but he helps me by giving me money. I honestly became the thing I always secretly bashed. No one understands how hard It is for me to be a single mom. I cry almost every night, some days are good and some are not so good. I cry because I feel I can't do anything....Can't go out...(I'm not a party person) but just being in the outside world...I'm still adjusting and I wish I did things differently....I feel my whole life I will have to explain how I became a single Mom to people and It sucks. Life became harder and lonelier...I feel no one understands me, and If I try explaining myself I just get judged or lectured. I always said IF I have a kid with someone I loved...but I screwed myself over. I love my son but sometimes I wish It was just me again.
by on Dec. 9, 2012 at 6:18 AM
Replies (11-15):
by on Dec. 10, 2012 at 3:08 AM
Thank you all. Well his dad was just a fling, after awhile he wanted to be more but honestly I don't love him. He's nice and all but I'm not attracted to him...(Ironic). Thi is when ppl tell me well why'd u sleep with him. I think i do need to go back on antidepressant pills and seek counseling.
by on Dec. 10, 2012 at 8:02 AM

Forgive yourself sweetie. You made a choice that has a permanent consequence but it does not have to be a life sentence. You have the power to make this a good thing in your life. You do not have to answer to anyone about how you became a single mom. It's none of their business. It's probably easier said than done but it's not an impossible situation. 

Look at your baby as a miracle and opportunity to love more than you have ever loved before. Accept the help from his father but be clear about how you feel. 

One thing I've learned is I don't have to explain or ask for permission to do anything because I am respoinsible for the consequences. That is a sign of maturity. 

Give yourself a break and find one positive thing today. You will be alright as long as you begin looking at the positive side of life.

Samantha Gregory
A veteran single mom - Ask me anything

by on Dec. 17, 2012 at 5:39 AM
Thank you. Last night his dad texted me he has feelings for me. I havr become clear ovet and over again, im thinking of erasing him out of life. It's annoying me and honestly I don't want to hurt his feelings.
by on Dec. 17, 2012 at 2:25 PM
1 mom liked this

Hi and welcome to the group.  It's normal to be depressed sometimes and be simply overwhelmed.  We are a great support group.  Take time out for yourself.  You need it.

by on Dec. 17, 2012 at 2:55 PM
1 mom liked this

I think you need to find someone outside your family and circle of friends to talk to, a professional that you can be honest with, that wont judge you and will help you learn to cope with some of what you are feeling. Being a single mom  is hard, being a mom period is hard even those who planned a child find themselve struggling to deal with the changes, seek out help and you may find that you feel better after you start unloading some of those feelings. 

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