Soooo .. . . I was in a relationship that, although it was brief, I thought was *the one*. He talked about marrying me. He swept me off my feet . . . and then . . . we found out I was pregnant after being together for only three months. It sounds naive now, I guess, but I truly was in love. He was supportive for about a week, and then he began pressuring me to have an abortion. I refused (we'd discussed my stance on the issue in one of our first dates), repeatedly. So, he broke up with me, saying that he was embarrassed of me and that I was the biggest mistake of life, and that we had created an even bigger mistake . . . That was in February, the last time I heard from him (he broke up over email).
I gave birth to my beautiful LO in September. I hadn't heard from him at all until the beginning of December, when, out of the blue, he emailed. He said that he felt that he should help with medical bills, and that he also felt that he should provide $300 a month for care (although he said he would be taking it out of his teenage kids' mouths). He never once mentioned "baby" in his letter, or his interest in visitation, and in fact said that he still didn't want anyone to know. I haven't replied because of my confusion.
I hadn't filed for support because my family scared me into thinking that he would try to take my LO from me if I requested support .. . but now that he's reached out? I don't know what to do. I do know that $300 doesn't even cover a month of health insurance ($465), and that he is a CFO of a successful company, making at least $100,000 a year.
I hate to make it sound so material and like a business exchange, but what should I do? Should I file for support? Should I let him know that I'm doing so first? I'm having an impossible time making ends meet. I don't think it's wise to do this "under the table" money stuff, but I don't want him to seek visitation purely out of a retaliatory stance. I actually think it would be positive to have a father figure in my baby's life, even if it makes my stomach hurt, but I want him to do it for the right reasons, and not because he's angry that he has to pay child support.
Any advice is welcomed/appreciated.