Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

Dating with a daughter???

Posted by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 9:36 PM
  • 12 Replies

Hey, I'm new to the group and I just in a bind. My daughter's father and I split when she was 2 months old. I want to start dating again, but I don't know if I can do it. It's not that I want to get back together with him, because that will never be an option even if he asked. It's just that I work in the criminal justice system and I see alot of crimes committed by the mother's boyfriend and I just can't imagine taking that risk with my daughter's safety. My friends and family are starting to pressure me about it because they don't like seeing me alone, but they don't understand my fears. I was just wondering if anyone else has this problem?

by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 9:36 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Barblicious
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 9:44 PM
1 mom liked this

I am highly protective of my daughter. I don't bring her into my dating life (LOL it isn't much of one) and frankly can't see myself getting close enough to any man in the future - so any dates I go on - they don't come around my kid. 

My friends and fmaily did pressure me, "Oh you must be so lonely...blah blah" it is such bullshit. I am the happinest I have ever been - as a single woman, who yes happens to also be a mother. If I was not a mother I sometimes wonder if they would pressure me more or less?

Barblicious
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 9:45 PM
1 mom liked this

Oh and on the flip side, my daughter's dad has his on-and-off dyfunctional girlfriend sleep in the same bed with him and my kid. It makes me sick. HOW WOULD HE FEEL IF I DID THAT? Yah. Thought so.

brieri
by Platinum Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 10:19 PM

 Fears? that's just it.. fears.  If you want to date again go for it.  It may be different experience because you have a child now to think about.

achavez219
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 10:30 PM
1 mom liked this

 I know the feeling.  I've got 2 dd's & everyone is asking why I don't get out there and date.  It's hard.  I was with their father (dh) for 10yrs until he passed last year.  Just the thought of bringing some guy even after dating for awhile is hard with daughters.  =/

Good luck & welcome to the group! =)

mytrueloveS
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 2:07 AM

I think it all has to do with trust.  You just never know, but fear should not stop you, I say just be extra careful.

Misha1204
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 2:14 AM
1 mom liked this
So, do you plan to be single forever? The same type of people will always be around.
Just got to be careful.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
lovejessierae
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 2:27 AM

i take it slow he wouldnt meet my son till i felt ready for it, the guy im with now already knew my son beffore we got together because he was friends with my baby daddy

strngenough
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 2:28 AM
I think the best idea is to go with your gut not your heart. My mom dated lira of terrible guys because she didn't want to be alone. She put them above us. If you date good men and keep your daughters interest at heart I don't see a problem?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
easinpc
by Gold Member on Dec. 19, 2012 at 10:16 AM
1 mom liked this

Honestly if you do not feel that you are ready I would not do it.  Do not let others pressure you into doing something you are not comfortable with.  Hugs!

Mommyandme878
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 10:31 AM

I had the same fears when my son was really young. But I made the decision to try again and trust someone and I found an amazing guy. Yes there are some terrible people out there but there are also really caring men too. I think you should give yourself time to get comforable with the idea of dating and having another man around your daughter, and THEN try. (IF you're comfortable). 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN