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Hey guys really need advice...

Posted by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 12:29 AM
  • 16 Replies
So I have been dating my SO for almost two years and he is amazing with my son and I live him to death. He had been working a retail job since we got together (not management just sales associate) and I've been trying to push him to get a better job for about a year. I am in college and working myself. He finally started really trying to get a job and for hired as a corrections officer (he has a high school diploma and military experience). He got the job just before thanksgiving and about a week ago he got jumpe while on duty. No major injury he was punched and had a minor bruise. I had been trying to get him to talk to me about it since them and he called me last night on his lunch break and broke down and started telling me how he just couldn't work there that it was too stressful and I calmed him down and said we would talk about it and figure something out. So he calls me tonight and tells me that he quit this morning. I am so angry, I'm angry he didn't talk to me about it first and angry he just gave up. I have to be in a relationship with someone who has a stable job and he quit with no backup plan. I don't even know how to begin to talk to him about it. Please help
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by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 12:29 AM
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Replies (1-10):
PumpkinSpice8
by Member on Dec. 19, 2012 at 12:41 AM
2 moms liked this
That's a difficult situation. I know it must be frustrating to have an SO without a current job. He definitely needs work that he's happy with and feels safe in and he needs a SO that is supportive of his decisions. Help him figure out something that he likes and help him work at it; as they say behind every successfully man is a strong woman. You will get through this rough patch before you know it. And in the mean time, enjoy Christmas and the blessings of having a family. :)
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Jers.
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 12:44 AM

Be supportive - it was obviously a diffilcult situation for him - and help him find something else.

mytrueloveS
by Lori on Dec. 19, 2012 at 1:50 AM

Agreed, be supportive.  If he's happy cleaning toilets for a living,  you let him.  In this life, we must do what makes us happy.  I would never push my bf to get a better job, he loves his job, and if he's happy I'm happy.  

strngenough
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 5:20 AM
Two years in is a little late to decide he needs to change. Especially if that means forcing him in to a dangerous job. It's not fair.
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happymommy1105
by Gold Member on Dec. 19, 2012 at 5:32 AM
this entire post I heard one thing...me, me, me.

where is he? where are his feelings?

he shouldn't have to discuss quitting a stressful and dangerous job with you. nor should you be angry about it.

his safety should come first.....
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Robsessed98
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 8:22 AM
I think youre being a bit unfair. I understand being upset about the loss of income, but give him a chance to find another job before getting so angry. You dont know how stressful that job is, or how traumatic that incident might have been for him. That job isnt for just anyone.
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Meglet1970
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 9:18 AM

Being a corrections officer is not for everyone.  That is a hard and dangerous job.  While it would be preferable to have a job before he left one, the job is clearly not for him.  If he liked retail, then suggest he work at getting a managerial position in one or find something else that he likes.

soulofsunmama
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 9:23 AM
I agree with everyone.
Why fix what's not broke?
He was happy, stable, and long term committed to his other job..that's says it all.
I think your being a little selfish and pretty controlling with this.
Now there's drama where there wasn't before.
I hope yall figure this out, and you can let him be him.
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lnrmom
by Bronze Member on Dec. 19, 2012 at 9:51 AM

He tried to talk to you.

That is not a job you can do if you get stressed out if you get jumped. He could get KILLED.

Tetiry92
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 9:51 AM
He hated the other job too.. He is currently living with his brother and his brothers wife for free and could barely pay his cellphone bill and car insurance. This is about him too before I always listened too him complain about never having money and how he wished he could get a better car (his wasn't even reliable) the only newer vehicle he could get was from his dad and the agreement was he would pay as he could towards $2000 that was six months ago and all he has been able to pay was $150. And I was and am supportive of him quitting that job but not with no backup plan. When I asked him what he was going to do his response was simply I don't know.
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