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If someone lives with their child's father but is unmarried and decides to leave how do you go about establishing custody?
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Dec. 31, 2012 at 10:11 AM
Replies (21-26):
Serenitymom
by Bronze Member on Dec. 31, 2012 at 4:38 PM

Where I live the paperwork costs you. Even with legal aid, you still have to pay a few hundred, cant get nothing free here. So I guess that too depends on the state. But then again if you live where I'm at,  technically if there is no custody agreement, the parent that has the child has legal rights to it. Meaning if she took off with her child, then it would take him going to court to get her back because he doesn't have legal right otherwise, but then again if the mother were at work and the father picked the child up and took off with the child, yet again it would take the mother going to court to get the child back because there are no legal rights established. So where I'm at, yeah its joint but also whoever has the child has majority right until there is a court order established. But that also could vary between states and what not.

Quoting MommyTo5Boys:

 I have never known of any family court to charge any sort of fees filing or otherwise.

 Yes social services will go after the other parent for payment if a parent applies and lists the other parent on the application, but even if welfare does go after the other parent for reimbursement that in no way gives that parent any sort of custody or rights regarding that child.

Quoting brieri:

 Family court is free?  The paperwork is what costs you to file.  Find out what that fee is.

Mom or dad doesn't have to be on the B/C, but if mom or dad has child and applies for some type of assistance - welfare, food stamps, etc, then they may request to know who the mom or dad is and they will go after the parent for payment.

Quoting MommyTo5Boys:

 Go to court and file for custody. You do not need a lawyer for this, and family court is free.

 If mom and dad were never married and bio dad is not on the BC or never signed an acknowledgement of paternity then Mom has full custody until dad files for custody in court.

 

 

 


monica1830
by on Dec. 31, 2012 at 4:39 PM

where i live the mother has custody when the parents is not even married n the father has no rights less he takes her to court for visits even if hes on the birth certficate but  the also have to do a dna on the baby if the parents are not married thats the new law even if he is the babys father n is on birth cerficate

MommyTo5Boys
by on Dec. 31, 2012 at 4:52 PM

 That is true, laws do very greatly from state to state.
 FYI, I am in NY

Quoting Serenitymom:

Where I live the paperwork costs you. Even with legal aid, you still have to pay a few hundred, cant get nothing free here. So I guess that too depends on the state. But then again if you live where I'm at,  technically if there is no custody agreement, the parent that has the child has legal rights to it. Meaning if she took off with her child, then it would take him going to court to get her back because he doesn't have legal right otherwise, but then again if the mother were at work and the father picked the child up and took off with the child, yet again it would take the mother going to court to get the child back because there are no legal rights established. So where I'm at, yeah its joint but also whoever has the child has majority right until there is a court order established. But that also could vary between states and what not.

Quoting MommyTo5Boys:

 I have never known of any family court to charge any sort of fees filing or otherwise.

 Yes social services will go after the other parent for payment if a parent applies and lists the other parent on the application, but even if welfare does go after the other parent for reimbursement that in no way gives that parent any sort of custody or rights regarding that child.

Quoting brieri:

 Family court is free?  The paperwork is what costs you to file.  Find out what that fee is.

Mom or dad doesn't have to be on the B/C, but if mom or dad has child and applies for some type of assistance - welfare, food stamps, etc, then they may request to know who the mom or dad is and they will go after the parent for payment.

Quoting MommyTo5Boys:

 Go to court and file for custody. You do not need a lawyer for this, and family court is free.

 If mom and dad were never married and bio dad is not on the BC or never signed an acknowledgement of paternity then Mom has full custody until dad files for custody in court.

 

 

 


 

GI_Jane230
by on Dec. 31, 2012 at 10:20 PM

She has every right to leave with her child, but custody will need to be established in court.  But  be careful.  He has every right to do the same thing.

Armygirl2299703
by on Jan. 1, 2013 at 11:37 PM

Before I left my daughters dad I filed the custody papers, had the courts serve him, which meant I had a few days to a week to get out. I'd been planning it for weeks and slowly moving the most important stuff of ours out and then one day he went to work, came home and we weren't there. He cared soooo much that it took him 3 days to call my cell to see if I was ok. Never even tried to call my mom.

I didn't use a lawyer. Did it all myself from start to finish.

Armygirl2299703
by on Jan. 1, 2013 at 11:40 PM

I am in AK and we have to pay to file in family court. Though they do have hardship type papers you can request to have fees waved. You just ask the clerk for it, explain your situation a little, fill out the papers and they still take a file the papers while you wait for a judge to determine if your fees will be waived. If not then you just go back in and pay whatever the judge says you need to.

Quoting MommyTo5Boys:

 That is true, laws do very greatly from state to state.
 FYI, I am in NY

Quoting Serenitymom:

Where I live the paperwork costs you. Even with legal aid, you still have to pay a few hundred, cant get nothing free here. So I guess that too depends on the state. But then again if you live where I'm at,  technically if there is no custody agreement, the parent that has the child has legal rights to it. Meaning if she took off with her child, then it would take him going to court to get her back because he doesn't have legal right otherwise, but then again if the mother were at work and the father picked the child up and took off with the child, yet again it would take the mother going to court to get the child back because there are no legal rights established. So where I'm at, yeah its joint but also whoever has the child has majority right until there is a court order established. But that also could vary between states and what not.

Quoting MommyTo5Boys:

 I have never known of any family court to charge any sort of fees filing or otherwise.

 Yes social services will go after the other parent for payment if a parent applies and lists the other parent on the application, but even if welfare does go after the other parent for reimbursement that in no way gives that parent any sort of custody or rights regarding that child.

Quoting brieri:

 Family court is free?  The paperwork is what costs you to file.  Find out what that fee is.

Mom or dad doesn't have to be on the B/C, but if mom or dad has child and applies for some type of assistance - welfare, food stamps, etc, then they may request to know who the mom or dad is and they will go after the parent for payment.

Quoting MommyTo5Boys:

 Go to court and file for custody. You do not need a lawyer for this, and family court is free.

 If mom and dad were never married and bio dad is not on the BC or never signed an acknowledgement of paternity then Mom has full custody until dad files for custody in court.

 

 

 


 


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