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F&%K I wish I bought a bottle of wine or something.

Posted by on Dec. 31, 2012 at 11:21 PM
  • 16 Replies
1 mom liked this

My kid's been really testing me the past week. Ever since Christmas, he's been crying and whining, whining and crying, crying and holding his breath to try get his way, crossing his arms and rolling his eyes when I am calmly talking to him about him not getting his way when we're here at home.


He's been crying a LOT lately because he has more things for me to take away from him when he's being bad. I don't do time outs because they don't work anymore. I don't spank for defiant behavior, but I do spank if he's throwing shit around like it has no value. 


My parents are pissed because they swear he gets it from me, but when I am mad, I don't do it and when I tell them, they get upset as hell and ask me why I'm getting defensive if I'm innocent? Why? Because it's fucking annoying, getting yelled at and accused of shit you don't do! So my dad is not speaking to me because when my parents dropped us off at home Friday, I fucked up, forgot my house keys so they had to drive the 1hr1/2 all the way back to their place. I felt awful but my dad thought I was being rude or something.


But my kid. I don't know what else to do. I've taken his toys away and all he does is beg me and beg me cponstantly to the point where I want to fucking SCREAM my head off at him. I've locked myself in my room to play some games on the ipad while my kid's screaming at me on the other side of the door because he's scared, but I just tell him I need a break from him. He wants to be attached to my ass 24/7 even when I need a time out before I freak out on him. I'm not worried about me as so much as to what the fuck happened over the holidays with him and his damn ATTITUDE. We were good until Christmas came and fucked everything up!!!

by on Dec. 31, 2012 at 11:21 PM
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Replies (1-10):
BeachMommy07
by on Dec. 31, 2012 at 11:31 PM
1 mom liked this

How old is your child? Can he get therapy? It sounds like you are under tons of stress. (hugs)

mommyecr3
by Member on Dec. 31, 2012 at 11:36 PM

Oh, hun you seem so stressed out. Sorry. How old is your son? I don't suppose he naps, does he? I can tell your issues and feelings go a great deal deeper than this suggestion may help - but, if your son naps you must try to find SOME way to relax. Forget the laundry and the house for a day. Or occasionally is even fine because that will give you time for yourself and lessen your guilty feelings you have that make you feel like less of a mom than you know you really are/can be. Sometimes I sit at the computer and just type in random words to get some soothing quotes or feel-good phrases: just try typing "inspirational quotes" (or phrases) and see how many sites pop up. These little phrases/quotes are relaxing and fun, honestly! Best wishes for a great new year, dear!

Mocking.Jay
by on Dec. 31, 2012 at 11:48 PM

I am under a lot of stress. Luckily, it's just family/personal stuff. I'm alright with finances, my living situation, etc. 

I might have to look into therapy soon if this doesn't clear up before he starts grade 1. I'm currently moderatiing his behavior because his dad has ADHD and my son was showing signs at age 3 already. I just find him hard to control at times. I can't talk to our social worker because she's on holidays until the end of January. :(

Quoting BeachMommy07:

How old is your child? Can he get therapy? It sounds like you are under tons of stress. (hugs)


Mocking.Jay
by on Dec. 31, 2012 at 11:52 PM

Thanks. And no, he won't nap. Actually, he stopped napping just before his 5th birthday in July. Just out of nowhere, he stopped napping. :/

I now encourage what I call "quiet rest times" where I send him to his room to play or look at books since he can't really read yet. I am trying to teach him but in between 5 classes, studying/homework, and taking care of him and a new puppy, I just won't have time to magically teach him to read. Well, I knew some words before entering grade 1, but I am scared he's going to have way too much energy to focus on learning. I really need that one-on-one inclusion worker...I have to make sure I notify the school I'll be sending him to. Grades 1-4 are the most crucial grades for children in school. I don't want him missing out because he has more energy than most.

Quoting mommyecr3:

Oh, hun you seem so stressed out. Sorry. How old is your son? I don't suppose he naps, does he? I can tell your issues and feelings go a great deal deeper than this suggestion may help - but, if your son naps you must try to find SOME way to relax. Forget the laundry and the house for a day. Or occasionally is even fine because that will give you time for yourself and lessen your guilty feelings you have that make you feel like less of a mom than you know you really are/can be. Sometimes I sit at the computer and just type in random words to get some soothing quotes or feel-good phrases: just try typing "inspirational quotes" (or phrases) and see how many sites pop up. These little phrases/quotes are relaxing and fun, honestly! Best wishes for a great new year, dear!


GoldenLinds
by Member on Jan. 1, 2013 at 3:43 AM
2 moms liked this
It sounds like he's desperate for your attention. Do you follow a daily routine? Has the holiday mucked it all up? Is he missing school and unable to express it? These are just the questions I'd be asking if it were my child and I've been there. Try making things more inclusive for him maybe. If you need to do home work then set up at the table or on the couch but stay together, quiet the house and set him up with books or coloring books right there with you instead of trying to send him to play on his own. As far as routine I found it always helped to use the same key phrases the teaches used whether It was quiet time or circle time or whatever. Take time after lunch each day to really put everything down and give him your undivided attention for a while. I know its hard to put off all the agendas but itmakes things smoother for all. Good luck and get that bottle of wine! (Just don't drink it all at once despite the temptation;-))
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Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Jan. 1, 2013 at 6:47 AM
Hope things get better.
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MommysTimeOut5
by on Jan. 1, 2013 at 6:54 PM

Keep taking time for yourself is really all I can say. He sounds like a handful right now and I know what it is like to have an overactive child. My DD is active and busy from 7am-11pm and does not take naps and is attached to my hip. She is on meds for seizures and  the medicine makes her hyperactive and off the chain. You are not alone. I cant even take a piss without her banging on the door and she is 6!!!!!!

Robsessed98
by on Jan. 1, 2013 at 7:16 PM
Sounds just like my 5 y/o gs who does have adhd and probable odd. Its quite the struggle, but you cant let him see you give up or give in. Take breaks for yourself when youve had enough. Talk to his teacher and see how he behaves at school.
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LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jan. 1, 2013 at 7:29 PM

Take your breathing time and maybe he needs to pick some toys and take them down to a shelter to donate so he can see how fortunate he is.  Stay consistant. The holidays are rough for everyone good luck.

MeeshMom
by Platinum Member on Jan. 1, 2013 at 7:35 PM
My son is a lot like this too. Throwing major fits and disrespecting but is attached to my hip. What helps is I make him go to the bedroom and stay away from me until he is ready to show respectful behavior. If he hits or throws with an item then it gets taken away and he goes to the room until he's ready to change. I've locked him in the bedroom to calm him down cuz he will literally punch and kick. It helps when I am firm and don't give him an option. Then I can cool myself down and explain to him mommy loves you but we must be kind and respectful. We must take care of our things and our family. I don't like that shit. It's hard when a kid is defiant and angry all the time. But I know it's hard for him dealing with me working all the time to support us. He just craves attention.
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