Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

would you go?

Posted by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 11:03 PM
  • 28 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Would you go?

Options:

yes

no


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 20

View Results

 Quick back story.  My father has done many things to hurt me emotionally.  This last one was during christmas.  He said he was coming to our annual christmas party at my brother and his wife's house. But cancelled last minute because he needed to be with his gf, whom he lives with. this is not the 1st time he bailed or not shown up due to his gf. she is very insecure and has yelled at him for talking on the phone with me.  i am just tired of all the hurt he is causing and now he is hurting his grandkids. he expects me to be happy for the life he has with his gf and forget about all the hurt he has caused.

He wants to have a gathering at his new house and i dont know if i want to go and he said if i dont go he said he is not going to have the gathering and cancel on everyone else. i cant go over there and pretend like everything is ok, but i dont want to disapoint by not going. i have tried talking to him and it doesnt do any good.

What would you do? Would you go? thanks for any responses or suggestions.

by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 11:03 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
tyfry7496
by Janet on Jan. 2, 2013 at 11:09 PM
2 moms liked this
Why keep being emotionally abused? He's trying to control you. If you don't go he's canceling the entire party? He needs to growup.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
mytrueloveS
by Lori on Jan. 3, 2013 at 1:14 AM

I wouldn't go.  Your father needs to step up and be a father, he's old enough to grow up and treat you with the respect you deserve.  

Ridingsolo
by Bronze Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 8:56 AM


Quoting tyfry7496:

Why keep being emotionally abused? He's trying to control you. If you don't go he's canceling the entire party? He needs to growup.

This!

Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Jan. 3, 2013 at 8:56 AM
1 mom liked this
I wouldn't go. Sounds like you've been hurt enough.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
deltathree
by Gold Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 11:03 AM
1 mom liked this

I wouldn't go - it's a toxic relationship. 

raeann1984
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 11:38 AM

i said yes. BUT i tend to be very forgiving. honestly my dad sounds like yours. he also makes plans and simply does not show up. no phone call no notice no nothing. he's dissappearred the last year  - the entire year!! on me and MY CHILD! and he did not pop back up ti lmy mom died and funeral plans were to be made. also, he promised to give me some insurance money, his idea, to help me care for my children and never did... but.. he is my father and i make every attempt to have a relationship with him since he is my only parent. so yes, id personally go. gl

stillstandin246
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 3:21 PM

 No.  I would be done putting myself in situations for him to keep doing what he's doing.  It sounds like maybe he wants to see you but can't man up to his girlfriend and do it so he's devising this.  Then he's guilt tripping you for saying he will cancel the whole thing if you don't go, thereby putting it all on you.  That's just nasty selfish behavior and I think you should just tell him you can't attend.

easinpc
by Gold Member on Jan. 4, 2013 at 2:22 PM
1 mom liked this

I agree.  I would not go and would also consider cutting ties with him.  Hugs!!

Quoting stillstandin246:

 No.  I would be done putting myself in situations for him to keep doing what he's doing.  It sounds like maybe he wants to see you but can't man up to his girlfriend and do it so he's devising this.  Then he's guilt tripping you for saying he will cancel the whole thing if you don't go, thereby putting it all on you.  That's just nasty selfish behavior and I think you should just tell him you can't attend.


MeeshMom
by Platinum Member on Jan. 4, 2013 at 3:01 PM
1 mom liked this
I wouldn't have contact with him anymore. Tell him go ahead and cancel his party because you prefer to be treated like a human being. Bye bye.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Stephd710
by Bronze Member on Jan. 4, 2013 at 4:29 PM

Say you're going and then just not show up.  Then call and say something came up.  LOL!

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)