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when you hit rock bottom... and then fall off a cliff

Posted by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 9:11 PM
  • 27 Replies


when you hit rock bottom, start to think you can make it out... and then suddenly start falling off a cliff that you didn't even know was there... yeah... that's about how i feel right now- the worst part is, it's all my own damn fault.

okay- no bashers please, because i already feel like the worst mother in the whole freaking planet.


i'm a single mom going to school full time for nursing. i do not receive child support.

in december i got paperwork from DHS asking me to renew my food stamps. this was the week before my CNA final and for whatever reason i read on the DHS paperwork that my FS renewal wasn't due until the end of the month. so i didn't turn it in until the 21st.

Of course... stupid, stupid me... read it wrong. it was due between the 1st-10th. I went in and talked to them in person, they can't even give me a date of when i'll start receiving FS again.

i have had a lot of other crappy things happen this month- the CNA job i really, really wanted fell through, the state is contacting the biological father of my son against my wishes. (he's violent and twice my size, but no police reports means nothing happened- awesome.)

i just, i don't know how much more i can take. all of this feels like it's my fault for missing stuff i SHOULD have known- this isn't my first year reapplying for food stamps, and now that i'm on break and thinking about it, i've ALWAYS had to turn in my FS before the 10th. WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING?? i had to take animal crackers out of my 2 y/o ds hands tonight and watch him cry and ask why the food is all gone.

because your mom is an idiot kid. a freakin idiot.

i feel like maybe i should've given him up for adoption to a family who could provide all of his financial needs, maybe love isn't enough. i'm feeling really low so if you are in a self-righteous vindictive mood, please share it with someone else... otherwise i may go all crazy irish girl on your ass!

anyone else ever messed up this big? i'm feeling pretty small right now.

by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 9:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
kkat117
by Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 9:18 PM
1 mom liked this
I have made similar mistakes although the results werent as bad because my dad helps a lot financially. You arent an idiot...everyone makes mistakes....especially when you are working as hard as you are and going through so much. You will get through this rough patch eventually...falling off the cliff just means you will have to climb up a mountain to get out....it will be tough, but somewhere there is a way up
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MeeshMom
by Platinum Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 9:49 PM
4 moms liked this
We all make mistakes. Look up local food banks and hit up a couple. They are there for a reason. It'll be ok.
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Mama_Gillogley
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 9:53 PM
5 moms liked this

that is the plan- i have a list of them already. my family will help with fresh produce for my son, and i can get the rest from food banks. it's not the end of the world... just really, really crappy. my family has been so helpful and supportive these last two years... i am really lucky to have them- my dad sent me home tonight with a ton of food out of his pantry and he gave me some cash... it may suck but i need to remember to be thankful for these people- idk where i'd be without them. and thanks for replying ladies. :)

Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Jan. 3, 2013 at 10:34 PM
1 mom liked this

I agree *HUGS*

Quoting MeeshMom:

We all make mistakes. Look up local food banks and hit up a couple. They are there for a reason. It'll be ok.


____________________________



Mama_Gillogley
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 11:00 PM

thanks, i realize now that it isn't the end of the world- just kinda felt like it at the moment. it's just one month, i will survive!

indepedentk
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 11:25 PM

A few months back did the same thing forget to do my recert it happens sometimes stop being so hard on yourself It won't rain forever it normally take a week before they process your case. Just because they contact the father doesn't not mean that he has to know where you live that can be with held. HOLD YOUR HEAD UP BETTER DAYS ARE COMING

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jan. 4, 2013 at 2:14 AM
1 mom liked this
Hugs mama contact food banks it'll work out it won't be easy but you will make it
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stillstandin246
by on Jan. 4, 2013 at 12:12 PM
1 mom liked this

 Don't be so hard on yourself.  I know that's easier said than done when we are moms who do it all, we hold ourselves to really high standards.  I do it too.  I hate it when I miss something that I should have caught.  But you can't change it now, you've figured out what to do in the meantime and that's what's important.  As for the state contacting the father of your child, they can do that.  But they can't tell him where you are, so make sure of that.  Deep breath, you will get through it and be ready for the next thing. 

easinpc
by Gold Member on Jan. 4, 2013 at 12:20 PM

Hugs!!

arimaur
by Member on Jan. 4, 2013 at 12:42 PM
1 mom liked this

 i know how you feel, it's a really ugly feeling.  you'll pull through.  just keep your head up and keep loving on your ds, that is definitely something that doesn't have a deadline to renew! big hug momma!

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