Stbxh and only recently split. About a month ago. I was a SAHM so we are still living together until I get work and an apartment. Well we fooled around a couple times in the past month. He was acting like old times and I fell for it and thought he'd change his mind.... When he didn't it hurt so bad...:( I picked myself up again and told him it wasn't going to happen again unless we got back together...
Well tonight I fell for it again!!! Ugh!! I'm hating myself right now!! We were goofing around like old times again and one thing led to another and I had to stop him. I told him I couldn't and he said sorry and went in the other room where he's sleeping... Now I'm crying and alone in my bed. Hurt all over...:( when will it stop??
Don't feel bad - it happens. My daughters dad and I had that happen at Christmas, and we haven't been together for 3.5 years! It is hard to remove the attraction and feelings, even when you know it is best to move on. I hope you both can handle the living arrangement while you sort out your future. Is there really no hope of repairing the relationship?
I wasnt falling for that
Men will usually be the first to initiate sex if they dont have anyone else to get if from. Its safer and quicker to get it from you then to go out and take a chance from a stranger.
Being you are under the same roof they think its ok.
You just have to be stronger and say no. If they know its there, they will try to get it.
At this point you need to stop falling for it and stop making it easy for him.
I'm in the situation with my bd. Its hard but everyday gets better. Just grow and learn from the situation.
I to was in this situation, although when we were separated we did not live together, it still happens. I can only imagine how hard it is for you to live in the same house now. I did allow him to stay in my home on a night per night basis and thought that I was doing the right thing for our child by letting his dad stay to have more time with him, in the end though it done more harm then good for all involved. My issues with him got deeper, his attachments to me got more suffacating and my child seemed to think it was just a play date and sleep over. So be strong and know you are worth more then a booty call for him, I know the road gets lonely especially when someone you shared such a imtimate time with is so close, but find other things to occupy your time and if you really have to find a great support system with your friends/family and see about working out an agreement since your tight on money. I have had friends in similar situations and I may not have had a room just for them, but we made do until it worked (They would babysit, clean house, cook in exchange for free R/B & a helping hand with child/ren while they job hunted).
I'm sorry that really has to be a difficult situation but that cycle will continue to happen until you put some space between in each other. I hope for your sake you find employment soon so that you can put some boundaries and space between the two of you.
It happens because you still love him, and you will always love him. but it wont end until you realize that you are worth more then that and you deserve more then that. Focus on you and stop spending so much time with him. People feed off what you feel and think about you, he can read you still love him and he still loves you but you have to love you and learn that this isnt good for you.
Good news, im so excited!
- blueeyedpixie
on Jan. 7, 2013 at 1:03 AM