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having a break down.

Posted by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 10:34 PM
  • 13 Replies
I'm having a break down. I don't know if I can handle this anymore. He is off having a good time and I'm home alone with our sick child. He off at the movies with some girl and I'm watching real housewives. I miss him so much and I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel like my friends are annoyed with me. When I try to talk to them. How can I love someone so much and miss him like crazy and he doesn't even care.
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by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 10:34 PM
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Replies (1-10):
LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jan. 12, 2013 at 10:40 PM
Hugs mama it's tough but time to let go. You broke up for a reason and its not fair but unfortunately it's single motherhood. My sons "father" texts on his birthday and Christmas asking how he is hasn't seen him in 2 years probably couldn't pick him out in a crowd. But I'm lucky because I have a beautiful wonderful son because of this jerk and I may not be out partying and instead watching dragon tales but my life is better and I don't need a man to be there beating me down making me feel like I need one to be happy.
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momma1708
by Member on Jan. 12, 2013 at 10:40 PM

It is a hard thing to do and I promise you it will get better, it will take time, lots of time. Try to start doing things for you. Try not to worry about what he is doing, worry about what you could be doing. What can you do with you kid? Sometimes starting a journal is a great way to vent when it seems like no one wants to listen or you feel like you don't have the right kind of support. I have started keeping one just this month and I feel so much better. I am seeking therapy for depression and anxiety and I am taking a mood stabilizer. Between writing everything I feel down and the therapy, the medication is to help with my being bi-polar, I have been able to let go of a lot. While collecting my thoughts and feelings as I write them down I begin to realize how much I am letting these things effect me and how they are ruining my life because I am letting them control me. I was giving my ex way too much control over my life and he isn't even around. 

jmoore10
by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 11:20 PM
I'm trying to let go im trying. but it's like I take one step forward and ten backwards. But I am going to start seeing someone about all this. I have been writing. Like when I wanna send him a text or I have something to say to him I write it to myself in a text then I delete it. And that's been helping but today I found one of my favorite pictures of us today and it put me back. One of my friends told me to get rid of them. And I don't want to. Because I want my daughter to beable have those pictures when she gets older. I have all these goals and plans set in place but I just don't know. All I know I is I wish he would come home. Leave that girl and come home to me
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jmoore10
by on Jan. 13, 2013 at 4:20 AM
I just saw his picture on another girls Facebook in her room with her kid in the picture. Like really how could he do this. Yes I understand we are not getting back together but one he didn't even tell me he just stop talking to me, two have some respect and not post that stuff on Facebook. And three how can he be around her kid or whatever that kid is but not call his daughter.
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Ridingsolo
by Bronze Member on Jan. 13, 2013 at 6:13 AM
2 moms liked this


Quoting jmoore10:

I just saw his picture on another girls Facebook in her room with her kid in the picture. Like really how could he do this. Yes I understand we are not getting back together but one he didn't even tell me he just stop talking to me, two have some respect and not post that stuff on Facebook. And three how can he be around her kid or whatever that kid is but not call his daughter.


1)  You need to stop checking his fb.  It's not healthy for you to keep doing that!

2)  How could he not care?  How could he do this?  <----- I spent a year obsessively thinking like that about my ex.  I ended up missing out on a lot of the joy I should have felt about my pregnancy and first few months of my son's life.  I regret all that lost time now.

The answer to "how he could do this" is that HE DOES NOT CARE AND HAS NO REAL CONSCIENCE.  I'm sorry to sound harsh, but thinking like that makes it a lot easier.  Let him live his empty and meaningless life.  Make yours fulfilling! 

Hope this helps!  I spent a lot of days/nites feeling like I was having a breakdown as well, so I can understand how badly you must be hurting now.  *Hugs*

jmoore10
by on Jan. 13, 2013 at 10:57 AM
But checking Facebook is the only way I know he is ok. He stopped answering my texts and calls like two weeks ago. I know it's not healthy. But I can't help it. I know need to do all those things but I just can't. The fact that I still love him and miss him is holding me back.


Quoting Ridingsolo:



Quoting jmoore10:

I just saw his picture on another girls Facebook in her room with her kid in the picture. Like really how could he do this. Yes I understand we are not getting back together but one he didn't even tell me he just stop talking to me, two have some respect and not post that stuff on Facebook. And three how can he be around her kid or whatever that kid is but not call his daughter.


1)  You need to stop checking his fb.  It's not healthy for you to keep doing that!


2)  How could he not care?  How could he do this?  <----- I spent a year obsessively thinking like that about my ex.  I ended up missing out on a lot of the joy I should have felt about my pregnancy and first few months of my son's life.  I regret all that lost time now.


The answer to "how he could do this" is that HE DOES NOT CARE AND HAS NO REAL CONSCIENCE.  I'm sorry to sound harsh, but thinking like that makes it a lot easier.  Let him live his empty and meaningless life.  Make yours fulfilling! 


Hope this helps!  I spent a lot of days/nites feeling like I was having a breakdown as well, so I can understand how badly you must be hurting now.  *Hugs*


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AMS29
by on Jan. 13, 2013 at 12:21 PM
I remember feeling this way...I'm so glad its over. Anyone can give you advise but you have to find your strength from within and decide when you have had enough. It took me over two years but I feel great now that I'm healed. He still tries to get me back but I am just over his bs. I stayed single and keep focused on moving up. Now he's hurt and I don't care
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PoplarGrove
by on Jan. 13, 2013 at 12:28 PM
1 mom liked this

If he hasn't called you or asked about his child in 2 weeks you don't need to be seeing if he's okay.  Block him as a friend on facebook.  then you won't see anything related to him.  He's not worth it.  

And if you haven't already go get the paperwork in order for child support.  They paying of child support typically ends a lot of the partying, lol.  

Quoting jmoore10:

But checking Facebook is the only way I know he is ok. He stopped answering my texts and calls like two weeks ago. I know it's not healthy. But I can't help it. I know need to do all those things but I just can't. The fact that I still love him and miss him is holding me back.


Quoting Ridingsolo:



Quoting jmoore10:

I just saw his picture on another girls Facebook in her room with her kid in the picture. Like really how could he do this. Yes I understand we are not getting back together but one he didn't even tell me he just stop talking to me, two have some respect and not post that stuff on Facebook. And three how can he be around her kid or whatever that kid is but not call his daughter.


1)  You need to stop checking his fb.  It's not healthy for you to keep doing that!


2)  How could he not care?  How could he do this?  <----- I spent a year obsessively thinking like that about my ex.  I ended up missing out on a lot of the joy I should have felt about my pregnancy and first few months of my son's life.  I regret all that lost time now.


The answer to "how he could do this" is that HE DOES NOT CARE AND HAS NO REAL CONSCIENCE.  I'm sorry to sound harsh, but thinking like that makes it a lot easier.  Let him live his empty and meaningless life.  Make yours fulfilling! 


Hope this helps!  I spent a lot of days/nites feeling like I was having a breakdown as well, so I can understand how badly you must be hurting now.  *Hugs*



jmoore10
by on Jan. 13, 2013 at 12:50 PM

i have the strenght to let go i know i do. but im not willing to let go. is my problem and its not for my daughter its me. i dont wanna let go of our relationship.

Quoting AMS29:

I remember feeling this way...I'm so glad its over. Anyone can give you advise but you have to find your strength from within and decide when you have had enough. It took me over two years but I feel great now that I'm healed. He still tries to get me back but I am just over his bs. I stayed single and keep focused on moving up. Now he's hurt and I don't care


jmoore10
by on Jan. 13, 2013 at 12:54 PM

i have all the paperwork. im just waiting for the free class at the court house to go and fill them out. i just wish he would realize how stupid he is and come back if not for me but for our daughter. she is amazing!!! yes all kids are amazing but with everything she has been though in her 4 short years of life she still has a smile on her face everyday and so cheerful and caring.

Quoting PoplarGrove:

If he hasn't called you or asked about his child in 2 weeks you don't need to be seeing if he's okay.  Block him as a friend on facebook.  then you won't see anything related to him.  He's not worth it.  

And if you haven't already go get the paperwork in order for child support.  They paying of child support typically ends a lot of the partying, lol.  

Quoting jmoore10:

But checking Facebook is the only way I know he is ok. He stopped answering my texts and calls like two weeks ago. I know it's not healthy. But I can't help it. I know need to do all those things but I just can't. The fact that I still love him and miss him is holding me back.


Quoting Ridingsolo:

 


Quoting jmoore10:

I just saw his picture on another girls Facebook in her room with her kid in the picture. Like really how could he do this. Yes I understand we are not getting back together but one he didn't even tell me he just stop talking to me, two have some respect and not post that stuff on Facebook. And three how can he be around her kid or whatever that kid is but not call his daughter.


1)  You need to stop checking his fb.  It's not healthy for you to keep doing that!


2)  How could he not care?  How could he do this?  <----- I spent a year obsessively thinking like that about my ex.  I ended up missing out on a lot of the joy I should have felt about my pregnancy and first few months of my son's life.  I regret all that lost time now.


The answer to "how he could do this" is that HE DOES NOT CARE AND HAS NO REAL CONSCIENCE.  I'm sorry to sound harsh, but thinking like that makes it a lot easier.  Let him live his empty and meaningless life.  Make yours fulfilling! 


Hope this helps!  I spent a lot of days/nites feeling like I was having a breakdown as well, so I can understand how badly you must be hurting now.  *Hugs*


 


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