Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

HOW IN THE WORLD DID I END UP HERE ?

Posted by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:18 AM
  • 9 Replies

I HAVE TWO CHILDREN. BOTH OUT OF WEDLOCK. MY FIRST CHILD FATHER IS A DOUCHE BAG THAT ROAMS MY MOTHER NEIGHBORHOOD AND DOSENT SUPPORT OUR CHILD AND ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM. MY SECOND CHILDS FATHER IS MARRIED. AND BECAME A DOUCHE BAG ONCE I DECICDED I DIDNT WANT TO BE HIS MISTRESS ANY LONGER. SINCE THEIR BIRTHS AND NOW A SINGLE MOTHER I HAVE ALWAYS ASKED MYSELF HOW IN THE WORLD DID I END UP HERE ? I HAVE BEEN BACK HOME FOR SOME TIME NOW. I THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE A GREAT OPPURTUNITY TO SAVE MONEY AND MOVE ON TO BIGGER AND BETTER FOR THE SAKE OF MY CHIDREN BUT THIS HAS BEEN A COMPLETE FAIL. MY LIVIVNG SUITUATION IS SO UNCOMFORTABLE. I CAN NOT FIND THE JOY IN THE BLESSING OF HAVING A ROOF OVER MY HEAD. I WANT BETTER I NEED BETTER. I SIMPLY WANT PRIVACY. THEIR ARE SO MANY THINGS THAT I WANT BUT I CANT FIGURE OUT FOR THE LIFE FOR ME HOW TO GET THEIR. IT IS LIKE AS SOON AS I ATTEMPT TO MAKE ANY EFFORT TO TRYING TO DO SOMETHING THEIR IS ALWAYS SOMETHING IN THE WAY BLOCKING. THEN I EVETUALLY THROW MY HAND UP IN THE AIR ANS SAY " FUCK IT ALL". PEOPLE LINES ARE BE PAITENT. BUT FOR HOW LONG WHEN WILL IT BE MY TIME ? I AM AT WITTS END. I AM NOT A DRINKER OR SMOKER, I DO NOT PARTY AND THESE PEOPLE THAT HAVE SOME KIND OF SOCIAL LIFE SEEM TO HAVE IT ALL UNDER CONTROL AT LEAST FOR THE MOMENT. I AM MENTALLY EXHAUSTED. MY BOYFRIEND HAS NO CLUE ON HOW TO HANDEL ANY THING. HE GIVES STUPID ADVICE OR MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I AM OVER EXTRAVATING. I AM NOT. MY PARENTS DICTATE HOW I SHOULD TAKE CARE OF MY CHILDREAN. I AM CONSTANLY PICKING UP EVERYONES MESS. I GUESS THEY FEEL LIKE THAT IS THE LEAST THAT I CAN DO NOW THAT I AM HERE. IT IS SO HARD MAKING IT OUT ON YOUR OWN LIVING IN THIS EXPESIVE CITY. GOOD LAWD HOW IN THE WORLD DID I END UP HERE ? 

by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:18 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-9):
stickyfingers
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:48 AM
1 mom liked this
change it then...what do you want? decide that and then start working toward it. i know its hard...i have four kids and am recently divorced...it sucks a lot but you can do it...if the boyfriend is stupid or whatever you said then you dont need him...maybe you should just focus on you and your kids right now until you get shit figured out...what about going back to school? you could probably get it free...
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
THEIRMOM718
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 2:03 AM

I AM SCHOOL TRAINING TO BE A ESTHETICIAN. I GRADUATE IN A FEW WEEKS. THAT I AM GRATEFUL. THAT IS A HUGE STEP IN MY LIFE TO DO SOMETHING THAT I ENJOY INSTEAD OF LETTING OTHER DICTATE WHAT I SHOULD DO. I HAVE BEEEN DIDECATED TO SCHOOL FOR 4 1/2 MONTHS NOW. TUES - SAT 9 -5PM EXTENSIVE TRAINING. I AM EXHAUSTED WHEN I GET HOME. I TRY TO TELL MY SELF THAT THIS IS ALMOST OVER AND I WILL HAVE TO=IME TO SPEND WITHT THE CHILDREAN ONCE THIS IS ALL OVER. THIS IS FOR THE BEST. MY FAMILY TRY TO BE SUPPORTIVE BUT THEY DICTATE WHAT I SHOULD AND SHOULDNT BE DOING OR HOW IT MUST BE DONE. MY BOY FREIND IS GREAT. HE TRYS REALLY HARD TO HELP OUT BUT AT TIMES HE DOSENT UNDERSTAND BECAUSE HE HAS NEVER EXPERINCE ANY THING LIKE THIS. AT TIMES HIS ADVICE IS SO STUPID. LIKE SLEEP WHEN THE KIDS ARE SLEEP. WHAT THE HECK. WHO IS GOING TO CLEAN THIS HOUSE AND PREPARE FOR THE NEXT DAY IF I AM SLEEPING. TIME IS MOVING SO FAST AND I AM TRYING TO KEEP UP I AM OVER WHELMED AT THIS MOMENT. I HAVENT A PLAN ON WHT I SHOULD DO ONCE THIS IS OVER I SIT AND WONDER AND DRAW OUT PLANS, THEN I LOOK TO THE LEFT AND SEE A PILE OF LAUNDRY THAT MUST BE ATTENDED TO. I AM TRYING TO PLEASE MYSELF AND FAMILY BUT I CANT FIND A BALANCE TO SAVE MY LIFE.

Lovingmyks
by Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 2:34 AM
1 mom liked this
Everything happens for a reason and God has a blessing in the making for you. I'm saying this because I know. I was just in the same situation. 2 kids (1.5 & 2.5) school, staying with granny and whoever else she let stay with her. On top of that my oldest has autism. So hang in there. Last month I didn't know when I was going to be able to move but in a week I paid my first months rent and deposit. No government housing or assistance all on my own.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
THEIRMOM718
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:06 AM

THANK YOU STICKYFINGERS AND LOVINMYKS YOU GUYS HELP ME OUT OF MY FUNK. I REALLY DO APPRECIATE YOU BOTH TAKING THE TIME OUT TO GIVE ME SUCK POSITIVE WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT. I NEEDED AFFRIMATION THAT I WILL BE OK. WELL ITS TIME TO KICK ANOTHER DAY BUTT IN THE ASS. AGAIN THATNK YOU.

KRIZZ25
by Platinum Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 6:37 AM
i as my self the same.7 years ago i had my own place ,nice job, husband,3 years old and twins babies. i could pay my bill and had what i needed.no i,m living wth family,no job .cant work do to a disablity .cant get ssi ..i,m so fucked.
brieri
by Platinum Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:45 PM

shoutinghow are you 

steviechick
by Gold Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:50 PM

Hello and welcome to the group.

Mommyto2LilMen
by Tina on Jan. 15, 2013 at 8:11 AM
Welcome!
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
victoriahearts
by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 11:17 AM

You need a major change that is obvious but you have to start with how you feel and how you view your life because if you can't change that and get  yourself motivated your life will never change. Have you tried talking to someone about everything so that you have an outlet for all the things going on? You may find that letting it all out will help you work through it all and let you put the best foot forward. After that you can start working on a list of things you want to do and figure out a way to get there, yes there going to be things on that road but that doesn't mean you can take around road to get where you are going. And if your boyfriends bring you down emotionally then maybe it's time for a break from each other until you feel like you are on your right path. You can get where you want to go but that you first have to start with taking care of yourself and coming up with a plan. 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)