am i wrong for defending my 19 yr old?

[arango]

so shes a good student a terrific person and an awesome mommy. ツ her dad and i have been seperated for many years but he still is involved in our lifes. Heres the thing, hes mad cause she has a boyfriend. Well i approve of him. He's nice,respectful ,he buys her and the baby stuff ,hes supportive,has a job and is just all around a good man for her. But dad wont even talk to her any more:( i mean he hasent said or seen her in seriously over a month now. I feel like hes beeing unfare and ugly twords her.she tries to reach out but he wont have it. So now i done got involved and cussed him out! I want to go straight to his house and black out on him but i feel like maybe i should just stay out of it. Im sooo confussed??? i wana have her back but she IS 19.

[Cooperfamily]

No u are not wrong, a parent is suppose to love their child no matter what, u are defending ur child, u are not wrong...u are being a mother...

[brieri]

Hi and welcome to the group.

Sounds like dad has issues of his own.  She's old enough to talk to him if she wants to contact him, she should find out why he doesn't want to be involved in her life. 

[mytrueloveS]

I would stay out of it now, she's old enough to have a talk with her father.  

[conniejo75]

This. She needs to sort out her own relationship(s) now. She is an adult and a mom.

Quoting mytrueloveS:

I would stay out of it now, she's old enough to have a talk with her father.  

[Musiq_Junkie]

This. I'm 22 & when I found out my ex chose 2 spend Christmas with his g/f rather than our 9 month old daughter, I was livid!I told her what happened and she went IN on his behind!!!She did it not only b/c he lied as to why he couldn't come, but how torn she could tell I was about the situation...and who wants their child hurt?(even of they are grown)

Quoting Cooperfamily:

No u are not wrong, a parent is suppose to love their child no matter what, u are defending ur child, u are not wrong...u are being a mother...

[LADYxGHOST]

Wrong? No.  Appropriate? Maybe not.  Having a discussion to address why he is behaving the way he is would be better.  Going off on him proabably ddin't help your dd any.  But as mom, sometimes it is difficult to see someone hurting our child and not go off.  She needs her dad and he is checking out.  You where being her mom, more than he can say.

[arango]

yea i guess i didnt help the situation by getting on his helmet but my daughter is so passive and so sweet i cant help but to wanna take charge for her. Thanks momsツ

[misslady80013]

Not wrong at all. I would have done the same thing. Even though she is legally grown, she will always be your baby. No mother wants to see her child hurting. I am a mama bear for sure. If you hurt my son, you will have to deal with me so I totally understand.

[arango]

yes! thats exactly how i feel. I know that alot of the moms advice say to let her handle it because shes grown. And i can appreciate that ,But i cant help it its just a natural instinct to protect. And my daughter really is a good daughter to him .I see every day how much it hurts her not to have him on her side when shes so happy. Uggh it kills me just thinking about how his absence and silence twords her kills her joy.

Quoting misslady80013:

Not wrong at all. I would have done the same thing. Even though she is legally grown, she will always be your baby. No mother wants to see her child hurting. I am a mama bear for sure. If you hurt my son, you will have to deal with me so I totally understand.

[misslady80013]

I hope he comes around soon. She can possibly start to resent him if he keeps it up. Good luck with this situation.

Quoting arango:

yes! thats exactly how i feel. I know that alot of the moms advice say to let her handle it because shes grown. And i can appreciate that ,But i cant help it its just a natural instinct to protect. And my daughter really is a good daughter to him .I see every day how much it hurts her not to have him on her side when shes so happy. Uggh it kills me just thinking about how his absence and silence twords her kills her joy.

Quoting misslady80013:

Not wrong at all. I would have done the same thing. Even though she is legally grown, she will always be your baby. No mother wants to see her child hurting. I am a mama bear for sure. If you hurt my son, you will have to deal with me so I totally understand.