Don't Call My Child "Spoiled Rotten" *Vent* (Kinda Long) (Updated)
So the guy I'm kinda dating has told me that my son is "spoiled rotten" a few times. He has a little girl who is about a year younger than my son. I almost feel like he compares our kids and that's how he's coming to that conclusion. But the truth of the matter is that their situations are NOTHING alike. In fact, her situation is tons better in my opinion. I'll give a couple examples of when he's said it and my argument against it.
I feel the same way about calling a child spoiled. It suggests that the parent(s) aren't doing a good job.
As far as how he is with is child, he's a great dad. He has her every other weekend and tries to see throughout the week when he can. I've only seen the two of them together once but he seems like he does a good job with her. He's been around me and my son together three times. Her temperament (from what I've seen) seems much different that my son's. She seems much more calm. Zion is more energetic. He does fuss about things... but he's two and acts very two. If you asked anyone, they'd say he's a pleasure to be around and is as sweet as pie.
Quoting quickbooksworm:
That behavior would be a deal breaker for me. I won't tolerate someone insulting me or my child. Spoiled isn't saying you provide enough or too much for him. It means a brat who throws a fit when he doesn't get his way. My son gets a lot of extras but is extremely well behaved so if someone told me I was spoiling and pointed every little thing out that was spoiling him, he'd be gone. I don't live under a parenting skills microscope.
Just curious, how is he with his child?
That's how I felt. I'm completely open to suggestions if you notice something that may need attention. But to say something like that is so inconsiderate.
Quoting lf1975:
I think your completely justified in the way you feel. If he cared about you he would offer suggestions and listen rather than calling your son a spoiled brat . To me that's disrespectful. If someone called my kids that I would be offended
Quoting naturALYme:I feel the same way about calling a child spoiled. It suggests that the parent(s) aren't doing a good job.
As far as how he is with is child, he's a great dad. He has her every other weekend and tries to see throughout the week when he can. I've only seen the two of them together once but he seems like he does a good job with her. He's been around me and my son together three times. Her temperament (from what I've seen) seems much different that my son's. She seems much more calm. Zion is more energetic. He does fuss about things... but he's two and acts very two. If you asked anyone, they'd say he's a pleasure to be around and is as sweet as pie.
Quoting quickbooksworm:
That behavior would be a deal breaker for me. I won't tolerate someone insulting me or my child. Spoiled isn't saying you provide enough or too much for him. It means a brat who throws a fit when he doesn't get his way. My son gets a lot of extras but is extremely well behaved so if someone told me I was spoiling and pointed every little thing out that was spoiling him, he'd be gone. I don't live under a parenting skills microscope.
Just curious, how is he with his child?
I probably should have said that he "seems like" a great dad. I actually think that's what I meant to say. And I know there's more to it than that. Since I haven't been around the two of them together much, all I could tell you is some of what I know. I didn't think I needed to go into a lot. But I know that he cares for her dearly. I know that he's not the type of dad to just pay child support and not help out otherwise. He's available and reliable if there's any reason his daughter's mom needs him (ex: if something comes up and she needs someone to keep their daughter). There very well could be more there but I don't know and may not ever know.
Quoting quickbooksworm:
I don't understand how you can say he's a great dad if you've only seen him WITH his daughter one time. There is a lot more to it than how often he sees his kid. And if he's saying stuff like he is, there is more there.
Quoting naturALYme:
I feel the same way about calling a child spoiled. It suggests that the parent(s) aren't doing a good job.
As far as how he is with is child, he's a great dad. He has her every other weekend and tries to see throughout the week when he can. I've only seen the two of them together once but he seems like he does a good job with her. He's been around me and my son together three times. Her temperament (from what I've seen) seems much different that my son's. She seems much more calm. Zion is more energetic. He does fuss about things... but he's two and acts very two. If you asked anyone, they'd say he's a pleasure to be around and is as sweet as pie.
Quoting quickbooksworm:
That behavior would be a deal breaker for me. I won't tolerate someone insulting me or my child. Spoiled isn't saying you provide enough or too much for him. It means a brat who throws a fit when he doesn't get his way. My son gets a lot of extras but is extremely well behaved so if someone told me I was spoiling and pointed every little thing out that was spoiling him, he'd be gone. I don't live under a parenting skills microscope.
Just curious, how is he with his child?
My kids r spoiled rotten, but u know what... They r mine to spoil rotten. If it bother u tell him how u feel.
Exactly! There's absolutely nothing similar about our situations as parents. (My situation is strange. I don't know any one personally who is in the same one as me.) So there's no way for him to truly understand.
Quoting Tish_Hughes:
I don't think you're wrong. It would make me mad if someone called my child spoiled. Especially a part time parent who doesn't even have their kid all of the time.
baby daddy advice.... how would you take this???
- naturALYme
on Jan. 19, 2013 at 8:38 PM