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First baby. Mom to Be and Becoming a Single Mom

Posted by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 10:14 PM
  • 5 Replies

Hey everyone!! My name is Ada. Well I have and need a whole lot of advice. I was engaged to my fiance for about a year and he has a son which he never knew about until 7 months after our relationship began. I decided to stay and stick through because I loved him and he loved me deeply. However, some weeks before our one year anniversary I found out I was pregnant and shocking to me he wanted to get an abortion and do all these things. But i  am my own woman and didn't buy into it. He said if I don't get an abortion, we will break up. We have had hospital visits and everything with being sick and he never came or replied any of my messages when I informed him. I am turning 22 and will soon be a Physical Therapist and just wanted to get some information on how do I go about these next four months to make sure I have a good first year. I am happy I am giving birth into the summer so I can focus on her.


But emotionally, physcially I am really down. He doesnt do anything towars helping me. Rather he in the life of his first child more and disregards me. I have given ip on him and feel he isnt ready to settle and from his behaviro has moved on as he excercices his flirting and men behavior.


Would love some blunt yet uplifting Advice.

Thanks Ladies and Moms,

Ada.


by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 10:14 PM
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Replies (1-5):
RyderMomma09
by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 10:28 PM

Unfortunately you can't make him do anything until the baby is born and you get a DNA test. Considering he wanted to get an abortion I highly doubt he will want anything to do with the baby so prepare yourself for that...don't put too much faith in a guy like that. Go after him for child support for sure. I would get some legal advice in the mean time waiting for the baby to be born. Just keep yourself healthy and concentrate on the baby that's all you can do.  Try to avoid fighting with him if possible its not going to help anything in your situation. Good luck!

Chevys_Mommii
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 9:08 AM
Thank you! That's what I am doing until them making these 4 months good and getting ready to do this without him. And yes I will put him on child support but I don't want him in my daughters kids because he isn't a good example.
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amonkeymom
by Gold Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 3:45 PM

Welcome Ada!  It sounds like you've gotten rid of a man-child.  I know his behavior toward you hurts, but you'll get past that.  After all, you have a sweet little girl coming into your life soon. :)

Quoting Chevys_Mommii:

Hey everyone!! My name is Ada. Well I have and need a whole lot of advice. I was engaged to my fiance for about a year and he has a son which he never knew about until 7 months after our relationship began. I decided to stay and stick through because I loved him and he loved me deeply. However, some weeks before our one year anniversary I found out I was pregnant and shocking to me he wanted to get an abortion and do all these things. But i  am my own woman and didn't buy into it. He said if I don't get an abortion, we will break up. We have had hospital visits and everything with being sick and he never came or replied any of my messages when I informed him. I am turning 22 and will soon be a Physical Therapist and just wanted to get some information on how do I go about these next four months to make sure I have a good first year. I am happy I am giving birth into the summer so I can focus on her.


But emotionally, physcially I am really down. He doesnt do anything towars helping me. Rather he in the life of his first child more and disregards me. I have given ip on him and feel he isnt ready to settle and from his behaviro has moved on as he excercices his flirting and men behavior.


Would love some blunt yet uplifting Advice.

Thanks Ladies and Moms,

Ada.



kidlover2
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 4:17 PM
How much do you want him involved in your child's life? Visitation and all that... imho if I had the chance I'd rather live without the child support and have him sign away his rights so I could do.it on my own and live wherever I wanted. My ex-husband is always getting in to my dating life and business through my children and it drives me nuts.
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Emiliush
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 4:38 PM

haa i feel you. i was 18... and his "father" never did ANYTHING!!!!!!! it's hardddddd.. try to get supportive team!! =] they would love to help.. and you will always get alot of respect from manyyyy ppl!!!!!!!!!!  scedhule times that will work for other ppl that will help you babysit. =]

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