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new to the custody world

Posted by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 1:56 AM
  • 7 Replies

 hi im new on here and i came here looking for some advice and to share about custody battles. i have a 4 year old daughter whos dad has been in and out for the last 2 and half years he was seeing her every weekend from fri-sun then she would come home and i had her during the week. well the last year her dad became more out then in he stoped calling texting to ask about her .i cant get him invovled what so ever. when he does have our daughter he spend more time on his phone texting his new girlfreind then he does talking to her so she gets frustrated. well finnaly after my daughter crying to not leave her at daddys and not wanting to talk to him i tried talkimg to him about it he calls me stupid and said i was being dumb. so my daughter has not stayed at her dad in while cause hes never home any way . i have started the custody process to protect my daughter . i was hopeing to here some advice on how to take on this battle because the only resson my daughters dad wants to have custody is to hurt me and thats not whats its about my daughter is very happy with were she is at and i plan to keep it that way but im scared this battle will go the wrong way and not in my favor so any advice i canget will help thanks alwasy worried and scred to go to court momma=(

by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 1:56 AM
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Replies (1-7):
Ridingsolo
by Bronze Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 5:49 AM

I'd be scared too!  Custody battles can get nasty.  My only advice is to document his lack of interest as best you can, and make sure you have a good lawyer!  Sometimes winning or losing can really be determined by who has the better attorney.  Good luck!

LifeCafe42
by Nora on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:56 AM
Document the no shows and go back for modification
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amonkeymom
by Gold Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 5:44 PM

Yep, document everything.... every time he doesn't show for visitation, every text and phone call, etc.

Quoting Ridingsolo:

I'd be scared too!  Custody battles can get nasty.  My only advice is to document his lack of interest as best you can, and make sure you have a good lawyer!  Sometimes winning or losing can really be determined by who has the better attorney.  Good luck!


sid1083
by Silver Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:03 PM
You can't make an adult do anything they don't want to do. That being said, when he asks for her, send her (looks better that you're not withholding) and document cancellations. The worst part in most custody cases is the fear of the unknown - take some time and just real if you can. True colors come out eventually anyway.
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steviechick
by Gold Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 2:59 PM

Documenting what is going on will help you in the end.  Your ex is showing he can't be a responsible parent.  He's seriously setting himself up for losing his visitation rights.  Continue to be a good mother and when you have enough 'ammo' get the atty involved and get a court date set up.  Your daughter deserves to be treated better than this.  Hugs, mama!

faerie75
by Ruby Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 3:16 PM

 focus on whats best for daughter and not villifying dad. make her available for vistation and be compromising but at the same time look for her best interest. its a balance.

faerie75
by Ruby Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 3:18 PM

 also... i think most attorneys just want the parents contentious so they can continue to have their hands in your pockets. my SO and his kids mom both were fighting tooth and nail and had a GAL, the works. the minute both of them could no longer afford their attorneys, all of a sudden they could agree and they are now civil, IMAGINE THAT!!!! if the dad is not endangering your kid, and is not likely to get an attorney himself, skip it.

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